Big Ass Hole

---

So it really is a big ass hole in the ground, cool place to see, the Swedes had to admit it was cool. The Swedes are such giving people at one point I look at Olof who is eating a melted Snickers bar and I inquire how it got so melted and he tells me it’s been in his pocket the whole trip and then asks if I want some, what would you say to such an offer, I politely declined Olofs generous offer. Now we venture into the desolate shithole called the desert with its wonderful moonscape and depressed Reservations. On a positive note we had Navajo tacos at a reservation trading post(thanks for the idea Mehens), like a page out of an Anthony Bourdain novel we attempted to eat the entire hubcap sized fried bread with meat and beans(reference attached photo). Cool safety note when Tom looks at you about 2 hours later and just plainly states “the beans” you are probably in for trouble. Even our best attempts only had us finish half and that was good enough, what a taco! Now we drive thru some of the most depressing areas with its poverty and lack of anything, thank god its winter and nice out. So we roll into Moab about 8ish and clean up in hopes of getting a good beer at the local pub, guess what they all close around 9 pm. Ok let’s cancel the NATO strike on the Swedes and just target Mormons instead. So we end up in Woody’s tavern for a beer and the Swedes needed to eat again I couldn’t even think of food but these human locust needed to eat because it had been 3 hours since our aborted attempt to eat 5 pounds of flat bread/beans/meat/cheese and lettuce. So here is the Utah deal, the good Mormon church I mean the state of Utah doesn’t allow bars just private clubs that serve 3.2 low alcohol beer, I guess they want to curb drinking at least that’s the way it would seem on the surface. Well the Swedes weren’t fooled by this stupid system that makes you buy a pass to the private club, only allows 3.2 beers but also allows them to serve hard liquor. Let me see if I can rationalize it in different terms, the state wants to curb chocolate consumption so you have to go to a private club that includes a membership fee and then we only serve a light version of chocolate but you can also get double double chocolate in the same place. So what is it we accomplished we’ve made a shitty chocolate that is only going to drive folks to the hard chocolate and they have to pay a yearly membership fee…………..nice target the F*&%%$$ Mormons how F#*&^^ stupid. I have started to feel symptoms of the Swedish flu coming on and in Olof’s defense Tom was the first carrier of the malady. Stay tuned for our last day in Arches NP

---