What I know for sure

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As my mom will tell you, there are a vast number of things that I don't know for sure. "Can you use vegetable oil when the recipe calls for canola oil?" or "Is it ok if I bake zucchini bread with a glass pan? Why did you always use metal pans?" and still "Pecans or Almonds, or wait, what about walnuts, which one should I use?" and that is just in one evening whilst trying, slightly successfully to bake a loaf of bread that I have watched her bake over 100 times. It seems that as I get older, the things the I know still vastly are overshadowed but what I don't know.

I don't know how to make a relationship work, even if i really want it too. I don't know how to get my students to listen, to stay awake, or to truly understand "the enlightenment." I don't know how to balance my checkbook. I don't know what to wear to school tomorrow. I don't know how to tell my 50+ old single male unemployed neighbor that I am never interested in getting a drink even if he is paying. I don't know how to get my apartment clean and organized. I don't know so much.

So when it comes down to it my list of what i know for sure is quite small (compared to Oprah, who seems to know something for sure every month). My list gets changed, rearranged and challenged quite often, but here are the finalists

5. Teaching is the best profession. Sorry doctors, lawyers, and those engineers out there. The reason can be summed up in two simple words. Summer vacation. But the kids are pretty great too. A older teacher stopped me in the hall a few weeks back and gave me the best compliment. He said, " when I passed your room, I heard laughter." "That", he said, "is what good teaching makes."

4. Fall is the most reflective and refreshing season. It's pumpkin spice lattes' of starbucks and the tom waits record on the cd player. Its new episodes of your favorite old tv shows. Fall lacks the pressure of summer, the captivity of winter and unpredictability of spring. The trees are always beautiful in the fall. Sweaters always feel comforting in the fall. I have had an excess of pumpkin flavoring and am savoring every bite/sip.

3. One day a week must be dedicated to yourself. A wise person once taught me this. Whether it is a Saturday morning bike ride or grocery shopping without an agenda or a time limit. Whether it is a whole one day or a combination of hours that make a day. Say yes to dinner with an old friend at a new restaurant.. Go on a walk before it gets dark. Leave the cleaning till tomorrow. It is so refreshing to be refreshed.

2. I don't make wrong choices. Maybe some wrong decisions (those boots were probably not necessary). But to me, choices are bigger. And I am a firm believer that we don't make wrong choices, we just choose certain paths. That just might be my justification for this and for that, but it gives me peace. We live in a world of so many possibilities and so many opportunities and I just can't believe that there is just one profession, one location, or one person for me.

1. I'll know more tomorrow.

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Photos

A night out on the town
My dear friend Amy and I lighting up the nightlife in Cleveland

Amy turns 21...or something close to that.
After 21, birthdays seem to have less build-up and less explosion. Thank god.

playing with the big leagues
It took me 2 buses and over 14 hours to make it to Mary....but I did it and Minneapolis did not disappoint.

The Ahrens family
Mom and dad and the foster kittens.

The foster kittens
ahh, responsibility!

Friends.
Stella with parents, Brandon and Milissa.

playtime at the beach
Grandma and Meredith. Fast friends