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Published: February 18th 2011
Try not. Do or do not. There is no try.
-Yoda
Wise words indeed. Welcome back faithful reader to the great mystery/science fiction/comedy/broadway musical that is my life. Yes, we've laughed and cried together, waited impatiently for the next blog and been inndated by whimsical nonsence, we've won awards and had to hide from the paparazzi, we've...
Well, that's not really true. But maybe you've enjoyed it nonetheless. In the classic form of presentations (note, if you will, that for the purposes of this sentence I'm pronouncing that word "preeeeeeeeeeeeeezintashins" and imagining myself wearing a monacle - not 100%!s(MISSING)ure why), I plan on telling you what I'm going to tell you, then telling you, then telling you what I just told you. Shall we begin? Of course we... shall.
What I'm going to tell you:
Had a trip and made some goals for life. I'll tell you about the latter, and save the former for later. (That sentence makes me smile a bit).
Now I'm telling you:
For the majority of January and a bit of February, I was lucky enough to get to spend some time teaching folks to sea kayak in the fjords of Patagonia. This sounds like a super neat tale with lots of interesting parts, and it surely is, but that particular bit will have to wait for another time, probably next week. Merely for brief context, I will say that I was working for NOLS, and one of my co-instructors had the same birthday as me, and both of us were going to be in the field on that day. She (Anne) was turning 29 and I was turning 26, which is relevant for reasons that I will explain later. For the purposes of that statement, "later" is "now", fyi. Anne told me several days before our shared birthday that I had some homework to do. Curious, I asked her to ellaborate. She explained that in order to properly celebrate one's birthday, one must create a list of things to do that year. She was writing 29 things to do in her 29th year and I should right 26 things to do in my 26th year. I agreed.
Shortly after beginning, I quickly deduced that there was an error in Anne's logic. This wasn't going to be my 26th year, it was going to be my 27th year because by turning 26 I was in fact ending my 26th year. By default, this became her 30th year, instead of the 29th like she thought. Believe it or not, Anne and I are still friends after my logic proved her to actually have the number 30 somewhere in her age, but it did take some chocolate to make that so.
At first I felt like this goal task was more in the realm of supportive friendship than personal growth. "It's kind of like dieting," I thought. "More people doing it makes it easier to do." However, much to my amusement, I soon found myself getting quite invested in this project. 27 goals to accomplish is quite a few, so they had to be relatively small. I teach goal-setting, so in order to avoid hypocrisy, they all had to be SMART. (If you don't know what that stands for, make it a goal to find out within a week. If you do know what that stands for, that last sentence should make you chuckle.) As it turns out, setting yearly goals based on the anniversary of my birth seemed to resonate within me much moreso than with New Year's Resolutions. New Year's doesn't really mean anything if you think about it. Somebody somewhere said, "It's cold, I like alcohol and acting like an asshole, and I'm really damn tired of writing the same number for the year." Solution? New Years. Needless to say, I wasn't consulted, although I almost certainly would have agreed with the logic. Anywho, my birthday is much more relevant. My 27th year is a real thing. This is the beginning of the 27th time that my body has gone around the sun. That's kind of neat anyway. So without further ado, and in no particular order, here is my list:
My List
- Get my body to weigh less than 210 lbs (without losing any limbs or organs), and maintain that weight for at least 6 months.
- Kiss somebody new - and not get slapped.
- Learn the 20 minute Tai Chi form.
- Finish designing and get my new tattoo.
- Learn to roll a kayak.
- Race in a 12 hour adventure race.
- Go on at least one "get-to-know-my-future-sister-in-law" outing with Helen. Dan, you're not invited. Sorry bro! 😉
- Cultivate a habit for the beverage "Mate", doing it as correctly as I am able.
- Climb at least 5 tall trees.
- Spend at least 5 hours a week (on average) walking or training Sierra.
- Learn to tie a "Monkey's Fist"
- Swim 1 mile in one go.
- Save at least $5000 more than what I have.
- Learn to meditate for at least 1 hour.
- Run 27 miles in a row.
- Learn something about different cigars, and develop a favorite (and be able to back up that choice with some sort of logic).
- Successfully build a friction fire at least 3 times.
- Read a whole book in Spanish, minimum of 40 pages. (And if anybody out there knows of a good kids' book that is generally around 40 pages long that I can order in Spanish, I'd be much obliged.)
- Participate in a whitewater hardshell class or seminar.
- Participate in a motorcycle class.
- Learn to do a cartwheel.
- Learn to cook something that I can't pronounce.
- Eat something that I'm pretty sure I won't like.
- Travel to at least 5 new places.
- Buy some throwing axes and practice with them at least 5 times.
- Kill, dress, and eat an animal. A fish doesn't count.
- Go somewhere recreationally wearing a suit and tie. Weddings and other such events don't count.
What I just told you:
So that's my list. If anybody wants to help me with any of those, I'd love to get some assistance. The deadline for all of these is 11:59 PM on February 7th, 2012. Let the fun begin!
Oh, and I'll talk about Patagonia sometime that isn't right now. Fun stories for sure, but not one's that I have time for at this specific moment. This is Soarpheat (now in my glorious 27th year!), signing off. G'night and happy trails!
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Dad
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Chris - Quite an impressive list. Once you get the cigar identified, let me know and we can discuss it's merits. And motorcycle only has one "e". Love ya - Dad