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Published: December 10th 2015
Senses - Tom Odell
It is kind of foolish to think that the stars have anything to do with our life stories.
But aren't they mesmerising?
As our human lives go back and forth on random patterns driven by our emotional will, they stare and shine without any alteration possible from our part.
The obsession by the untouched and the grand makes me wonder why we don't celebrate the micro world as we pray to the eternal.
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Strong minded people have populated my world since I was born. It is important to me to make the distinction between what people say and how they actually behave.
Being strong headed, having a big personality makes people interesting, energizing. They bite in life like there is no tomorrow and advocate for their doings and sayings without withholding any information. They do not doubt. Having their own reflexions on the world and selling nothing but pure righteousness; it’s the only way they know, the only way to go.
But being so true and alive as they are, you live and lie in the moment. Reacting to actual feelings, gathering information on the moment and heading straight to the wall because that is what your gut are telling you to do. Not that they are blindfolded or unable to learn, simply that they act and talk without any kind of restriction or inhibition. This can lead to great adventures, heart to heart conversation and nothing else but pure will to live and pursue dreams. It is a unique beauty coloured by cultural differences and personalities, but flawed in it’s own dependance on emotions and need for action.
I tend to befriend such persons because of their lively shine, their tendency to laugh out loud not giving a damn about weird gazing strangers and drawing their own path leaded by what they feel to be right, never what they are told to believe.
But being so unstable and driven as its downsides too.
I have come to a point in my life where I do understand that all of us have different priorities and hurts. To embrace and understand mine is what I try to do. The thing is: you have to gain full understanding of a situation before you take any decisions. When you strive to live in the moment and push every living second to its limits; some people tend to get lost in emotions. I would be lying if I said I always think before I act. But whenever it comes to others; if ever I feel that my actions will impact someone’s life or are inspired by estranged words, I will think twice. The roots of my awkwardness are feeding deep into my love for my fellow humans and my interests in their well-being. I do not want to shock without purpose, I never wish to inspire hope and affection that I can not withhold, I long to reassure wondering minds and warm lonely hearts. But I learned that on the road.
Hotheaded people will on some occasions point to you and yell their own mistakes. They cry in despair at misunderstandings they have never cared to explain to another. They’ll lay on shoulders the weight they are scared of, never having gotten used to the long term kind of feels.
Where I would have usually responded yelling to yelling, hurts to tears and anger to insults; I have lately surprised myself with… Patience and boredom.
I see where it comes from, I know the sudden screams are not directed at me, but are in response of an unknown feeling, an unplanned reaction or a loss of control. I now see that there is nothing but waiting that helps such a situation with this particular kind of people. I will nod and accept, offer my shoulders to cary the weight unwanted for a short time, knowing that their love for me will have them consider the situation once again; if you do not duplicate their ways, they will eventually ask questions, seek an answer and see the options.
I am trying to teach myself patience and self-respect. That is what I am aiming to tight now. To see that I do not have to cary the burden of everyone’s unhappiness is a new thing to me. There is just so much I can do, I accept my responsibilities and apologize for my mistakes and sometimes lack of reflexion; but I am no hero.
As they are, you are and I am; we only struggle for living.
To be patient and reasonable is to open the door at learning and teaching.
No place to fall - Steve Earle
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D MJ Binkley
Dave and Merry Jo Binkley
Just be nice
I loved reading this thoughtful blog. No matter how much passion someone has you must go to your quiet place and determine what is best for you. Each of us has different needs, we are in a different space. it sounds like you are doing a lot of contemplation.