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Published: March 12th 2019
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The joke goes: What do you call a driver in Dubai who uses their turn signal? … A Tourist!
The only good thing about driving on the roads of Dubai is…they are new…that’s about it. If you can travel in the New Jersey/New York City area, you can pretty much navigate in Dubai. There are LOTS of circles (or rotary’s or round-abouts – whatever you want to call them), speeds bumps, speed humps (there is a difference), and U-Turns. Unless you are at a traffic light, it is rare that you will find a left-hand turn. In this country they have tried to make driving idiot proof while there are lots of chances (and people) to be a complete idiots. When you come to a four-way intersection with a light, one way is allowed a green at a time. This makes for extremely long red lights…especially if you get there as the light is changing. With that said, you have to be in the mindset that you can’t be in a hurry to go anywhere in this town. Without traffic, everything is about 20 minutes away. Unless of course there is traffic…and yes there is LOTS of traffic around here.
Here are things you can expect to happen while you are driving in Dubai: You will be cut off, the right lane with end at some point, people will drive off the road or park on a sidewalk if it involves dropping a child off at school, you will suddenly encounter a speed bump for no known reason, and you will see speed cameras nearly every 1/4 mile on main roads. Within 6 of the 7 emirates you are allowed to go 20km over the posted speed limit. The one exception is Abu Dhabi. If you are clocked 1km over, you will be ticketed. Oh, and tickets are all digital. If you don’t check, you won’t know you have a ticket (or tickets) until you go to register your car for the year. They need to be paid at that time. If you are lucky, the Crown Prince may waive or reduce all tickets on National Day, which is in November. Needless to say, I will be waiting for that to pay mine… which, unfortunately, was NOT for speeding but for cutting a lane to go straight when I was supposed to veer right.
Waze is a very convenient app in this country…we use it all the time. While everything here is in kilometers, I refuse to change it from miles. It’s the “American” in me. That being said, the app works great but you really need to pay attention. Exit ramps can split two or three times in a short amount of time and the app can be delayed. The good thing is that it works is parking lots. You may say, “who needs a GPS app in a parking lot”? Trust me! The exit out of the parking lot you take can make the different in 10-20 minutes of you arriving at your destination. As well, when you are saying, “where the hell is the exit”, the app helps in getting you there.
I’m pretty sure the expression “You can’t get there from here” was started in this country. You can see it, but damned if you can figure out how to get there. And if you miss the turn or pass the building for where you are trying to get, you are totally screwed. The chances that you could just turn around are slim to none. The chances that you could just go around the block are pretty much non-existent. This is when Waze kicks in the best and re-routes you.
Now let’s talk about gas. I’m not referring to flatulence but petrol or gasoline. These aren’t the Exxon, Mobile, or Shell’s of the world. The government owns all gas stations. They don’t post signs with prices as you don’t have any options for competitiveness and there aren’t enough stations around. Nine times out of ten you will have to wait in a line to get gas. Some days are worse than others and you just have to learn where to go and when. Some times, you don’t have a choice so you just suck it up. Many people ask me how much gas costs. First off gas is in liters…add to that the price per liter is in Dirhams so it’s a lot for my little brain. To sit down and do the math, it is equal to about $1.95/gallon as of the last time I filled up. And living in Dubai is just like living in New Jersey. There is a laborer who pumps your gas, washes your windows, and tries to upsell you on fuel additives. Additionally, it is not uncommon to tip the guy a few Dirhams for going above and beyond. There is however, a very cool app that they have here. You log in and it detects through GPS that you are at a gas station, you indicate which pump you are using, and when finished pumping you can pay and charge it to your credit card. Totally eliminates contact or communication with another human being other than saying “Fill it up with Special.” That’s the way I like it.
Occasionally, you will find a carwash at the gas station. In my one experience using that service, it sucked. Your car gets dirty pretty quickly here and it’s from sand. Especially after it rains, which is rare, your car will get filthy. It appears to pick up all the sand particulate in the air and deposit it on your car. Technically, you can get fined if your car is too dirty. For that reason we have it cleaned every 2-3 weeks. These “washes” typically take place in a parking garage at a mall or work and there are some instances that your parking garage at home will have someone. Our apartment has someone in the garage but he wants you to pay him monthly and he will clean the car 3 days a week. Way too much…as in too many times. We usually get it done when we are going somewhere. They typically approach you after parking while they haul around their little cleaning cart. You ask how much and give them a bit more for a tip. You come back to your car and WHALA…it’s clean. I have no idea what they do, but it’s shiny as new.
Speaking of cars, this is definitely the place to find expensive and fancy cars. A BMW or a Lexus are considered passé. In fact, there is an Uber type service here called Careem. They only use Lexus sedans to pick you up. Coming out of our garage, I will pass a number of Bentley’s, Maserati’s, Porsche’s, Rolls Royce’s and at the exit, which is where the good spots are, they line up the Ferrari’s, Lotus’, and Lamborghini’s. Funny side note, I was driving out the exit and caught the car washer taking a selfie with the fancy sports cars after he had washed them.
Finally, let’s address the speed limit in Dubai. Sheik Zayed Road (or The Z as I like to call it) is the main highway through town. In Dubai the speed limit is 100km/hr. While going through neighborhoods, the speed limit is 40km/hour and then side roads are anywhere in between (typically 60, 80 or 90km/hour). Heading south to Abu Dhabi, the speed limit will increase to 120 and finally 140km/hour when you enter that Emirate. Luckily, Waze includes all of the speed cameras so you need to pay attention.
The best way to understand driving in Dubai is to come visit. You can then experience the adventure and return home with some good stories.
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