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Bikes. Everywhere. Amsterdam will be remembered for the bicycles…
Except that unlike in Italy, these ones are not noisy Vespas that go hurtling past, rather, they are of the pedal variety. They are literally everywhere, chained to anything that’s solid, ranging from fences to trees to benches to rubbish bins. Apparently, tens of thousands of them get stolen each year, which is surprising given that there appears to be three for every resident. And if they aren’t chained to something solid, they will end up in the canals as a drunken late night joke. Thousands are pulled from the canals each year, according to the tour guide.
If they aren’t chained to something, they are being ridden flat-out by students, mums and delivery men, apparently obeying some road rules, but I was unable to work out what they were. The Dutch appear to have taken lessons from the stunt drivers we used to see at shows, as they criss-cross each others paths with unblinking faith and speed, usually chatting away with a mobile phone held to one ear. They will ring their bells furiously at you if you happen to find yourself wandering along their bike paths.
They also seem to like playing chicken with tourists, as they don’t stop for you if you have to cross their path. I’m pretty sure that bikes give way to pedestrians in most parts of the world, but here they rule supreme. They expect you to know that they are there, or are about to be!
It was surprising to see how low-tech they were, with single gears and drum brakes, and yet still for sale for 300 euros. Then there were the variations on a theme bikes. I saw one with two extra kiddy seats behind the main seat and a basket holder out the front. (I wonder if it was called a Volvo station wagon?) Then there were plenty of delivery bikes, with a large basket or box in front of the rider, and what would have been remote steering, as the front steering wheel was far from the handlebars. Very innovative.
OK enough about the bikes. Amsterdam is a city that is based around a huge canal system. It felt like a (just) slightly more modern and planned out version of Venice, with lots of cobblestoned streets and lanes, and buildings of all
shapes and sizes all jammed in side by side. Actually there were many buildings that had a pronounced lean to them. The laneways got narrower as you looked upwards, not because of perspective, but because the top of the buildings front wall was hanging out over it’s feet by at least a foot or two. At the top of each building, there was also a beam with a hook. This system is used to hang a block and tackle, for those times that you want to move your new couch in. The internal stairs are horribly steep and narrow, so removalists bring the furniture in and out the front windows. Apparently the buildings were designed with a lean on them to help with this. I’m not sure why they didn’t just make the beam longer, so the rope was further out from the wall, because it looks like dodgy workmanship to me! It honestly looks like half of the buildings will fall into the street one day.
There were many buildings that did have actual structural issues. I saw a few that had beefy frames constructed out the front of them, made of wood bigger than power poles.
"Lean on me..."
What else are neighbours for? Expensive stuff to restump a house that’s sitting on a swamp! Then there were others that had obviously sunk in one corner, but the windows and doors had just been shaved to suit. There were also other buildings that heavily relied on their neighbours to justify their continued existence. I wonder how the Venetians got it right?
One thing that Amsterdam is famous for is coffee shops , although these are under threat. Amsterdam is trying to clean up it’s image. The coffee shops apparently now have to provide a non-smokers area, which kind of defeats the purpose of going to a coffee shop in the first place… I can’t say I’d know all the details, as I don’t smoke and I don’t drink coffee!
The red light district is the other thing that Amsterdam is famous for, and is also under the spotlight, so to speak. Here, members of the worlds oldest profession come and stand in small shop front windows, in little more than bikinis (little, little bikinis), with a room “out the back”. If the shop front curtain is closed, don’t bother knocking! About a third of the windows are already disused, with
art displays in them instead. A window costs around 120-150 euro to hire per eight hour shift, which the girls make in the first hour or two. There’s lots of money being spent and made here. The plan is to have them all closed within a few years, but I’m not sure how they’ll do it. No photos of this one, as I like my camera and face just the way they are…
It was explained to us on the walking tour that the Dutch have lots of laws, but many are able to be overlooked or creatively bent, as long as three golden rules weren’t broken. 1; You do it discreetly, 2; no-one complains or gets hurt, and 3; if it’s good for business. The double standards have been going on for centuries. A recent example was that it’s illegal to have topless waitresses in bars. (Given what’s on display outside in the street, that’s a strange one). Apparently, a bar (the Banana Bar) has gotten around that one by not “serving alcohol”, but rather selling you a glass, into which the waitresses will pour various drinks for you to “taste” over the course of an hour
or two. The old example was the churches that were built around the red light district hundreds of years ago. The good catholic sailors who had been at sea for months would come and spend their money with the ladies, and then go and admonish their sins at the church, for a fee of course… And, if you were sailing the next day, you could also admonish your sins in advance, for a fee as well! Gotta love the church…
And, surprisingly, cannabis is actually illegal there, but the whole scene meets the golden rules, so it’s tolerated. Perhaps all the cannabis and the “blind eyes” that they have been turning can explain the crooked buildings too!
Another nice city to visit. I took a bunch of photos again, but again I don’t think I captured the essence of Amsterdam as well as I’d hoped to. I had planned, but didn’t get time to, hire a bike and go for a decent ride further out of the main city. I’d be like a local and have fun hunting down tourist pedestrians, except that my camera might blow my cover…
Next time.
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heraclio
Hans Klausmann
My City
Very detailed desciption of my city, good read and very narative, like the pics too. Hans from Amsterdam aka on this site heraclio