Les Roches des Condrieu/Condrieu

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The next day we went off exploring. We could see a vineyard all up a big hill opposite and the little guide book the guy in the marina office had given us said there was a woodland walk to a wine producers. We set off to do that. It was a lovely walk through woods, past streams and vineyards and amongst nature. It was almost all uphill so was a good way to blow out the cobwebs from the night before! We picked fresh mint we found growing along the way as fred had suggested we make mojitos later.
When we finally arrived at the Chateau itself we found it closed. We couldn't taste wine after all. Gutted. Still the walk had been nice and we could see out over the town from the top of the hill. We were all tickled by the unicorn door knockers (it will make sense if you've seen Jimmy Carr's DVD – it has a tasteless but hilarious joke about a unicorn in it). We headed back down to the town. The walk down was slippery and Becky and I hadn't really come prepared for it. I wore bejewelled sandals with no grip and Becks wore pumps. We came to a slope covered with smooth rock. Mike slipped as he went down it (he'd worn flip flops – none of us really thought through the footwear situation) and very nearly knocked Fred over. Whilst pissing herself at Mike's mishap, Becky slipped and nearly knocked me over. We decided to penguin walk the rest of the slope to minimise the risk of further damage.
Back at the bottom we went to a little merchant selling the wine made at the vineyards we'd visited. We tasted a few different ones and bought a couple bottles of a gorgeous fruity white. We then walked a few more miles to the supermarket to buy dinner for later. Fred suggested we have a different cocktail every night while they were 'on holiday' with us, so we bought the ingredients for mojitos and bellinis, some steaks, potatoes, baguettes, salad, more of his favourite 'crack crisps' and other stuff.
That night we ate chicken and salad with my homemade potato salad and drank the delicious local white wine. After dinner Mike rustled up some mojitos- bright green due to the mint syrup he'd used. They were awesome. Chris and Phil were on board Amy and we poured them some mojitos too. They joined us for another night of cocktails and conversation.
The strikes were still on, and the capitain came to the boat the following morning to advise us not to go as we would not get far. He offered us an additional night free of charge, which we took him up on. Chris and Phil were staying aboard Amy that day as they were having something delivered to them so we asked them to keep our place on the pontoon while we went off fishing. The sun was out and we wanted to make the most of it. We untied our dinghy and passed the rope to them so they could tie it in out berth as we left.
We spent the afternoon relaxing in the sun, chatting, trying to fish (Mike and Fred tried all sorts of bait from Roquefort, to crisps, to pancetta, and even fruit chews, but to no avail – despite there being a constant stream of fish on our fishfinder all day! Mike thinks it's scaring them off) eating steak sandwiches and sipping beer and a couple bellinis. Fred looked uber gay in the drivers seat with his fishing rod balanced between his legs and his shirt open. When I told him his response was to tweak his nipples and pull an even more camp face. Brilliant.
When the sun went in later that afternoon we returned to the marina, got showered and had some pink champagne. When it got dark we went off to find a restaurant to eat at. As we left I asked Mike to “Pass my wallet … and put your money in it.” Fred choked on his champagne laughing and leaned in for a high five. “That's brilliant! 'Pass my wallet and put your money in it', I'm definitely using that in future.” Becky gave him a smile and a look that said 'No you're not mate.' Mike passed my wallet, with his money in it. Ask and ye shall receive.
There were two restaurants close by. We walked through a dark holiday park to the first restaurant. It looked closed. A guy was sitting in there though so I knocked on the door. He opened it and was instantly confused as Fred waved cheerfully and said “Au revoir!”. Poor French bloke. I ignored Fred, tried not to laugh and asked the guy when they were open. It turned out tonight was the only night they were closed, but he recommended the Bellevue, overlooking the marina. I thanked him and said goodbye. As soon as he had gone we all cracked up at Fred's mistake. He'd meant to say “Bon Soir” and hadn't actually realised he'd said goodbye until we laughed at him. Bless. Fred's French makes Del-Boy look fluent.
The Bellevue was awesome. It's got a michelin star so we were expecting hefty prices, but it was actually really reasonable. We had set menus with delicious palate cleansers in between and amuse bouches beforehand. Every mouthful was delicious. Fred commented that he had never heard anyone make sex noises about food before eating with me. Before long everyone was making Mmmm noises as the food was all just amazing. The presentation was brilliant as well and it made you sad to destroy such art as you ate!
After dinner we paid up and went home absolutely stuffed full of amazing food to polish off our bellinis. Tomorrow we were heading down river.

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