My Epiphany and the Return of the Eel.

---

Salut World!!!!

(I have been in a quandary about what to do with this entry - i started writing it last weekend and stopped only to go and pick Ed up from the airport. Unfortunately my mindset has changed a bit since then, had a bit of a nasty surprise which i can't quite laugh about yet. I thought it better to post it now anyway and I will write a small, more current, entry soonish letting everyone know how i'm doing. When i feel more up to it. Especially as I promised myself that i would record my year as truthfully as possible. However we can't have two depressing entries in a row. Hope this makes you all laugh - send me love, need it at the minute.)

Im sure you will all be glad to know that the theme today is less mildly depressing than the last time. Am aiming for uplifting on this occasion haha.

This change in attitude can mainly be attributed to my realisation yesterday that i don't actually mind being on my own. This errant thought first occurred to me during my first ever descent of the Dune's other side. This other side is the one closest to the sea - it is much less steep and much longer and leads directly to a lovely little beach. I was wearing a red sarong and my bikini, my chic sunglasses were perched on my nose and the wind provided a refreshing relief from the heat. The same wind was playing carelessly with tendrils of my hair and there was a gorgeous view. All in all i felt very arty, quite attractive and although i'm sure this mental image of mine differs drastically from the rather banal reality - i felt very at home in my skin, just content that it was such a nice day and i got to enjoy it. It made me realise i was incredibly lucky to have an entire year ahead of me which would be filled with similar moments. A year just for me and no-one else. It made me feel a bit special.

This all sounds a bit airy fairy now but basically i stopped being sad that i wasn't with all my loved ones and that i was missing out on stuff in England and started to really enjoy my year instead. Am trying to take to heart this peice of advice recently given to me by a veteran traveller from the land of Aus, (aka Emma Dorph) "There's no point missing home because everything will be exactly the same when you come back. Everyone should be jealous of you not the other way around. "

However my epiphany only truly dawned when i overcame one of the last taboos of the modern world. Dining alone. Marie had, as normal, departed for the weekend to Bordeaux and as i hate cooking for one i decided to have a quick bite at the restaurant. I'd always imagined it to be an extremely embarrassing moment when the waiters ask "Are you waiting for someone?" and you have to reply "Nope just me this evening" - and it was a bit, but there was none of the expected pity, just a smile and follow me. I started to think that people were just a bit overly dramatic about the situation when i was led to a table with an excellent view.... of the kitchen. Not for me one of the lovely tables close to the live music with a smelly candle expressly to warn away wasps and mosquitoes. Nope - i was at the back, as far as possible from the stage, tucked in a corner behind a tree...with no candle. However i passed a very enjoyable evening people watching, ate a delicious mixed grill, had 2 beers (with grenadine) and a passoa and lemonade, i even danced for 10 minutes. And it was lovely. I did what i wanted, no-one bothered me and the biggest relief - i could think in english. So as the french would say - "tout va bien" (all is going well) - i'm acclimatising.

THE EEL STORY

I'm sure you've all noticed that there haven't been any online celebrations about my fantastically warm and powerful fixed shower. This is because it remains unfixed.

Upon arrival in the mobile home, within my first hour, Marie and I discovered what appeared to be a small eel living in the toilet. I don't mean a tiny silver fish - i mean i could actually see see its eyes (I may have imagined the teeth) - nonetheless it was large enough to freak us out.

Having bested the beast with multiple flushes, life continued as normal. (This is all linked i promise.) However about 3 days ago, around 10pm, i was sitting on the loo, very much minding my own business when there was a sudden clank, some splashing and the whole toilet started shaking. My memory had been scarred enough that i knew instantly this was the return of the eel. As such i leapt from the seat and determined to protect my innards from the serpent - forefront in my mind all the stories i'd heard about slithery things in the Amazon entering the body by all the wrong apertures.

In a state of panic which i can only attribute to the incredible vulnerability felt when caught unawares with one's trousers down, i cast about wildly for a weapon. In doing so i threw various things off of our bathroom shelves on to the floor and almost decapitated myself tripping over the shorts which remained around my ankles.

It was while my face was crushed against the taps that i spied the toothpaste. Why, i hear you ask, out of all the things that inhabit a girls bathroom did i choose this mundane, everyday item as my weapon?

I have 3 reasons

1) Firstly, as i was informed by various friends age 15 and have since tried and can therefore verify, toothpaste has wonderful drying out properties. (It literally sucks the moisture out of anything and everything and therefore works better than Clearasil on teenage acne.) However this property also makes it perfect for combat against anything slimy - i wanted to watch the eel shrivel like a popped balloon - the way that slugs do when you cover them in salt.

2) Toothpaste (in a tube) doubles as a projectile if you violently squeeze it - so there was no need for me to get my hands near those (i'm sure venomous) teeth.

3) It burns. Especially if you get it in the eyes and thats exactly where i was aiming this time.

After about 20 seconds of standing stock still, bottom half nude and brandishing a tube of toothpaste, i plucked up the courage to peer into the bowl....... and saw nothing.

About 3 seconds later when i'd finally lowered my minty fresh projectile, there was a knock on the door. I quickly made myslef presentable and dashed outside - my eyes were still a little wild, my heart was still going mental in my chest and my belt was trailing behind me, attached to my shorts by only one loop so i can forgive the look of alarm in the eye of the handyman on my doorstep.

He casually informed me that he had just made an attempt to fix the shower - god knows why at that time of night?! - but that instead he had broken the loo. (This at least has since been fixed.) I decided against swearing at him in multiple languages but I swear to God if i have heart problems in the future i'm coming back here expressly to sue him.

Who WITHOUT WARNING tried to fix a shower a 10pm at night and messes it up?? He almost gave me a bloody heart attack. However i continue to live and torture you all with these mammoth blog entries. Sorry about that.

Love you all xxxxx

---

Photos

Arty Meg.
I know i don't look much like the ephemeral image i painted - but if you could all lie and say i look extremely artistic and carefree that would be great.