Woody the Woodpecker


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April 15th 2012
Published: April 15th 2012
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Welcome in our new addition to the family: an injured and more than annoying woodpecker, who Cedric found and brought back to the house on Monday. It's not that I don't like animals, not at all but after out-staying his maximum 3-day stay (the amount of time Laetitia and Cedric told me he would need to recover), annoying us all continually by hitting the side of his cage with his long beak (especially when we sit down to watch a film) and escaping on a number of occasions, I've had quite enough of him. The rest of the family are of course all madly in love with him and Laetitia seems to fancy herself a bit of a bird-whisperer.

On Tuesday morning I was in the house alone, eating my breakfast when I suddenly realized that the loud, irritating tapping sound usually coming from the living room had stopped. I got up to go and investigate and there, perched on the dresser next to his cage, was the woodpecker. Seeing him with his dark, piercing eyes, long dark beak and in all, a form which didn't at all suit its domestic setting, I became quite scared. In truth, I did what I usually do - panicked. I shut the living room door as fast as I could, muttering most un-Christian words before rushing into Anais' room and shutting the door firmly behind me. What to do? Here I was, alone in the house with a woodpecker (which the family have since christened Woody) on the loose. I decided to make an emergency phone call to Cedric: 'Err...Cedric, j'ai un petit souci - l'oiseau est sorti de sa cage.' His response didn't come back at all how I expected it to. It was one of 'don't panic. It's fine. Laetitia can put it back when she gets home.' Ok then. And so I waited. A part of me even wondered if the bird was clever and strong enough to be able to open the living room door. Such thoughts confined me to my room with the door firmly shut, awaiting the arrival of Laetitia.

It was in the end Cedric who popped in to put the escaped bird back in his cage. But after that traumatising experience, I can no longer wait to say adieu to Woody the woodpecker.

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