Visiting Kat in Santa Barbara was sobering in ways that I can't explain. Perhaps it's because we're the same age, grew up together, and we're young lovers once. Perhaps she reminds me of the time that we've lost being wanderers and wasting our youth. I look forward to and dread our meetings. Not because there's no love there, but because I know we will always have honest conversations that go deep, to our insecurities. That's what happens in relationships when you only see each other once or twice a year. The transition from "Hello! How are you?" to "What are you doing with your life?" is much faster than in normal relationships. We always know the real score so we can't pretend that we have everything together like the impression that most people have of us.
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