Travelling as a lifestyle; 'you're living the dream, right?'

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"Where are you at the moment?"

People are naturally very curious about a lifestyle choice that involves yearly uprooting and consistent upheaval, among other things. I often get told "I couldn't do what you do." by friends, strangers, and indigenous people alike. I always reply "why?" and hear a variety of reasons; 'I don't want to learn a new language', 'I'd miss my family/friends too much', and probably the most common 'I'm not brave enough'. I hear this a lot, and have wondered whether I'm this kind of magic being that has fabled powers of stoicism... Like a Dwarf in a role-play video game. Probably not the case. I've wanted to travel for years, and so I put my unremarkable coping ability down to my resolution to keep roaming and experiencing new, exciting, preconception-shattering things. All of that having been said, there have been numerous instances that have made me want to fly home and hide under my mum's bed. In a previous blog post, I delineated my motivation for travelling, so it makes sense to talk about a few of the difficulties I've experienced along the way. It's no surprise that travelling can be difficult at times, but perhaps the sheer variety of possible ballaches that can occur will consistently surprise seasoned travelers, let alone newbies like myself. I'll talk about some of my experiences, in no particular order, so that there's more of an insight into what I mean.



Entering a new country, and learning how much you stand out.



In Indonesia, I encountered a way of living that couldn't have stimulated my curiosity more. Islam, indigenous culture, outlook on life... I was to get a massive education on these ingredients of Indonesian culture during the year that followed my starry-eyed arrival. I landed in Indonesia and spent my first night trying to sleep amidst a cacophony of thunder, and torrential rain. I landed at 11pm, and finally got to sleep at 2am when the storm abated. The next day I awoke and went exploring. I could say 3 words in the local language 'terima kasih', and 'satu' ('Thank you', and 'one'). I was greeted with stares, unfamiliar language, and massive smiles. I marveled at the peoples' skin tone, their lack of spacial awareness, and their ability to hold three different conversations at the same time without pausing for breath. (I would soon learn that this ability extends to doing this in 2 different languages, at the same time... Indonesian, and Javanese.) I marveled at the women too. 'They're beautiful!' I thought. The locals marveled at me too; I was 120kgs when I arrived in Indonesia, as well as being rather pale and hairy-faced. I'm now 110kgs, a bit less pale, and a lot more hairy-faced. I was the subject of excitement whenever I went into a public place, with people running over to ask for photos, a chance to practice their English, or just to beam toothily and say "hello misterrr! How are you?" ...Without understanding the reply. On a trip to a beach, I was asked for about 10 photos in a couple of hours, and levels of interest were heightened due to my half naked body, and tattoos. Indonesian people would just grab my arms and squeeze the muscles, remarking "kuat!" which means 'strong'.



I was to make great progress with the language over the next few months, with some Indonesian people assuming that I'd lived there for years, based on my ability (and the generally poor level of capability of most foreigners in the language). This was the thing that saved my sanity; the ability to communicate with people. I experienced many language difficulties during the following months, mostly due to my obvious foreign appearance. People would panic at the sight of white skin, and initiate the conversation in English. It's very courteous, but it made me massively homesick at times. One woman dropped a cup and saucer on the floor when I answered her polite, but poor, English greeting by asking in Indonesian if she'd prefer to speak in her own language. I got preferential treatment on so many occasions due to my ability with the language, and the rewards you reap from learning the local language cannot be overstated. I felt guilty at being given free stuff by people who were likely to be earning a quarter of my salary, but to refuse the offerings would have been rude. How was the language difficult to deal with? The initial period of learning is fraught with mistakes, miming, and gesturing in shops. You feel ridiculous, and it's embarrassing. I managed to raise my Indonesian level above the general level of English in my local city quite quickly, which vastly helped with my subsequent learning.



The local religion, and religious influence.



There are no two ways about it; if you go to Indonesia, you will be hearing it, seeing it, and probably smelling it during your time there. I'm talking about Islam. As a religion, it's not remotely connected to my personal ideology, and thus it felt omnipresent at times, because it is a large part of life for most of the population. Mosques are not quiet. There are calls to prayer 5 times a day, with the first being at 4:00am. Often followed by a few choice curses from me, as I went for an early morning pee, and some between-sleeps reading while I waited for the assault to desist. It's a very public religious place, and the usual introductory questions are; where are you from? How old are you? What's your religion? In that order. The wide-eyed response when I answered 'atheist' (the word helpfully crossed over to Indonesian from English) confused me at first. I was later to learn that you have to declare a recognized religion on your visa, and 'atheist' is not an option. This lack of freedom annoyed me.



In Taiwan, the religion is much more private. I've had one person ask me about my religion; a white, catholic missionary. I personally dislike being approached in public and being asked about something extremely private by recruiters. I was grumpy with him, and outlined my personal beliefs on the difference between spirituality and religion, as well as my opinion on the Catholic church (when asked). He wasn't comfortable with the discussion, and the conversation ended not long after.



Taiwanese people seem much more insular about their religion, despite how publicly prevalent it is, and the general Buddhism and Taoism that pervades most of society, whilst being overtly practiced, is somehow also extremely unobtrusive, or intrusive to non-believers. In fact, I'd imagine I annoy them due to the amount of time I spend in temples here. They're incredibly serene places, often seeming quiet and even ethereal, despite being situated in bustling city-centers, or on the side of busy main roads.



The novelty wears off.



When you arrive in a new country, everything is shiny, novel, and fresh. After a honeymoon period, this seems to wear off, and you start to be able to accurately assess whether you feel that you can live in this place for a long time, or not. At this point in time, a lot of the things that made you chuckle at the start now seem to grate. People staring at you because you're a foreigner was a big one for me, and people smoking in restaurants. You start becoming unjustifiably angry at small things. This wouldn't be every day, but maybe once a fortnight, I'd feel this way. Sometimes just for a few hours, sometimes for a day or two. On a bad day, I'd need to be away from people unless I was teaching. I separate life and work very strictly, mostly because I work with other people/children. This attitude change means that you start to need an effective coping strategy. My solace in Indonesia was to be found in donuts and coffee, working out, and getting into the countryside for a few days per month. My honeymoon period in Indonesia was about 3 months, and it's been the same length of time in Taiwan. My coping strategy here is Subways, coffee and cake, and hiking like a hobbit on a mission once a week.



Getting around.



This is not easy in a second language until you've practiced, been lost, been misinformed, accidentally boarded the wrong bus, and so on. I have chased a bus for a full half a minute in Sumatra because it left from a different place a full kilometer away from the placed it arrived at, and no one told me even when I asked about it the night before. I caught the bus, and the subsequent flight back to Java... Just!



Travelling within foreign countries can also be difficult for people because they're used to comfortable, convenient transport. Luckily, I'm from Wales so I was in the opposite camp! The size of train seats in Indonesia is definitely more in favor of the smaller physique. The buses often have air conditioning, unless you're in more rural parts of Indonesia, so I was rarely caused any great discomfort.



In Taipei, the MRT subway system is phenomenally organised, efficient, and cheap. It's very similar to the MRT system in Singapore; busy, clearly signposted, and foreigner friendly.



Getting sick.



This is obvious, because you're in a different part of the world, so there's bound to be something nasty lying in wait for you at some point! I got properly sick twice in Indonesia, and have been perfectly healthy so far in Taiwan. I first had a massive fever, and was bedridden for 2 days (my first genuine sick-days off work in my life!). The second incidence was food poisoning in Bali, and my stomach was so upset that even a sip of water induced a vomiting session reminiscent of a Little Britain sketch. I had to walk to the local hospital, and was treated extremely well. The visit to the pharmacist involved me running to the toilet, and nearly collapsing in the queue for the cashier, before I said in Indonesian "I'm very ill, and I'll be very quick, please can you help me?" to the shocked cashier. Instead of assisting me briskly, she was excited by hearing a foreigner speaking her language, and started asking me where I was from in Indonesian. My reply was somewhat disingenuous; "Wales, a little country next to England. Can I buy those (tablets) now please? I'm very ill, and I need a shit."



Visa issues.



It's illegal to work (and be paid) in Indonesia without the correct working visa. I arrived in the country on a 30 day temporary visa, and started working immediately, as most people do. People normally get a working visa after a couple of months. The problem was that 11 months into my 12 month tenure there, I finally got my working visa. This is obviously not good. This was caused by a paedophile ring being supposedly discovered in a school in Jakarta, and subsequent working visas were slowed down to a ridiculous degree. After all that furor, the case slowly collapsed after medical evidence was presented. Regardless, during this 11 month period, I had two visits to the local police station, where they attempted to intimidate me so that they could rinse the school for as much money as possible. I was very nervous the first time I went, but when 6 months passed between the this and the second visit, I realised that police weren't serious about their jobs, and were actually just trying to get as much money as possible from the school. I was very short with them during the second visit, causing the police officer to attempt to mollify me by asking whether I liked soccer. My answer of "No." was followed by the question "Lots of people like it in your country don't they?". I replied "Yes they do. Have you got any more questions about the school, or can I go home?" I was taken home about 30 minutes later, after being questioned for nearly 90 minutes.



Homesickness.



Another obvious one. This feeling hit me much more often than I expected. After a few months without certain things, you start to feel very alien, and foreign. I'm very independent, but I did have to chat to a number of friends and family to keep myself sane when I was missing home. Certain smells, phrases, foods, pictures on Facebook, and thoughts remind you of the country you've left behind. I tended to miss familiar food, friends, and occasionally the lifestyle I'd had before I left the UK. I had a really amazing group of housemates, and I still miss living with other people whom I'm extremely comfortable with. My cure for any manifestation of homesickness is to indulge myself; McDonald's, Pizza Hut, and now in Taiwan, Mcvities chocolate digestives... The list is longer than my arm, but shorter than my waistline!



Friends at home.



This was always going to be a difficult aspect of moving abroad; the people you love the most are 10,000 miles away. Contact is based entirely on Skype/Facebook for me. People miss Skype/call dates (I'm pretty disorganized too, so I'm certainly not innocent here!) promise stuff, or surprise you by not making an effort. This happened when I left home and went to university, so I'd experienced this before. It's very much a double-sided thing, and I'm certainly guilty of this too. You miss hanging out with your friends, but I have found that you end up with a core group of friends who regularly contact you, and want to keep that going. Naturally, this goes two ways, and I often bug people whom I particularly miss talking to frequently for days. Friends say they'll visit, but my advice is to imagine that the next time you'll see them is when you're next home, as promises are naturally subject to circumstances. This is going to be my angle on things, as it seems to be an accurate way to gauge when I need to return home for a month to see everyone, and catch up with people face-to-face. This was what I did when I went to university too, which was a very similar experience to travelling in this way.



I can only imagine how difficult it must have been to travel in the days before the internet/phones. I plan to find out, by having a look at doing a few weeks in the rain forest in Borneo/South America at some point in the near future. It's easy to imagine that peoples' lives stop when you go travelling, but in actuality, they're advancing themselves as well. It's very strange to be outside of their regular loop, and to find out important stuff long after you would have, had you been at home.



A friend of mine from home died in a work accident a short while ago, after I'd been in Taiwan for just a month or so. Needless to say, I mourned, cried, and scorned the injustice of life. I mourned very privately, and in public, I was as natural as possible. This was a very difficult experience, because I was so far away, and felt completely useless. Everything I thought of doing felt superficial, because it was only via the internet that I was able to talk to friends about it, and I infinitely prefer face-to-face contact. I am talking about this because it has had a huge effect on the way I view life, and also because it was something I'd never expected to happen during my time away from the UK. I still think of him almost daily, and I struggle to imagine seeing what home is like without him. I was fortunate to have friends at home to talk to at this time, and one even asked whether I wanted him to light a candle on my behalf in our local church to show support for our friend and his family. Of course, I was extremely grateful for this solidarity.



Cultural differences.



Another obvious difficulty of traveling that cannot be overstated. 'Oh shit. You're all crazy.' pops into your mind so often, and yet the objects of my bemusement are probably thinking the same about me. In Indonesia, the people are very physical. They have a very different perception of personal space to westerners, and would constantly be far closer to me than I was initially comfortable with. I had a baptism of fire on a train in my first fortnight; a man sat down next to me and was chatting with me in English, whilst resting his hand on my thigh. I wasn't comfortable with this, as I thought that he was gay, and that he thought I was attracted to him. I thought he was being sexually overt, but I couldn't have been more wrong. The Indonesian teachers, laughing raucously, explained that Indonesian people touch your leg (even quite far up...) as a social gesture to show that they're comfortable with you. He was, in fact, being extremely ingratiating and friendly with me. It's awkward when a man does this to you, but when it's an attractive woman, the messages couldn't be more confusing! There was a countless number of occasions when I wasn't sure whether a woman was being flirtatious, or simply friendly. As with all cultures, I eventually got used to it, and I adore that aspect of Indonesian culture. I'm struggling with people in Taiwan as a result, as they are much more private about their personal space.



Asian people will express happiness with an extraordinary alacrity at times, but this is in contrast to their expression of anger. Indonesians and Taiwanese alike, they simply smile if they feel awkward. This is infuriating if you're actually annoyed about something, because you want it sorted out with no fuss, rather than five apologies, a nervous half-bow, and a smile that indicates that they've run out of ways to express that they're embarrassed. I once got hit by a reversing car in Indonesia, and was knocked 6 feet away across the car park. Indonesian people don't look behind them when they reverse sometimes, and their driving is appalling. I berated her in Indonesian (probably more vehemently than necessary) asking what she'd have done if I'd been a child, or a baby. She sat at the wheel, her face whiter than I thought possible for an Indonesian, and smiled nervously as I remonstrated. Because they're often suppressing their anger, when it does come out, it's quite a sight! I had a flaming argument with a man in a supermarket after he hit his child over the head so hard that I (a deaf person) heard the sound from the other end of the aisle. It's the only time I initiated a heated argument in Indonesia, and his anger was palpable. I'd never presume to lecture people on parenting, but I couldn't watch such behavior without registering my discontent with it.



One aspect of Indonesian culture that I was initially nervous about, but adore now, is how physical the adults are. But the children are too, and the parents are fine with kids sitting on your lap, sticking their hands into your beard, and all manner of the adorable things that kids do. British people grow up in an environment where there have been a lot of paedophile scandals that have been publicized a lot by the media. As a result, physical contact (an indication/expression of reciprocal trust for most children) is shunned in the UK schooling system, to a degree. It's extremely sad, in my opinion, that the actions of a despicable minority should affect the interpersonal relationships of the wider population. In Asia, there's little problem with such contact, although I make a point of letting the kids initiate it, out of respect for their personal wishes.



Another aspect of culture that surprised me was perception of time within different countries. In Indonesia and Taiwan, people are often 30 minutes late for things, forget that they're meeting you, or cancel at the last minute. Communication here isn't very good, so people will often text you after you've arrived only 5 minutes early and have now been waiting for 20 minutes. I hate lateness, and it's one of very few things that genuinely pisses me off. If I am late for something, I get sweaty and anxious, with a knot in my stomach. If someone else is late, the feeling isn't so bad, but I still can't occupy myself easily. Reading a chapter of a book, or a few games of Catan on my phone are the only things that work. Even after a year of Indonesians arriving late for things, etc etc, I'm still not much better about it. I have the same difficulty in Taiwan, and I imagine I'll have it wherever I go next.



Dating in another culture is interesting. I had numerous dates in Indonesia where the girl wanted to introduce me to her family, and would mention marriage and serious commitment on a first or second date. I was not after the same thing, as you can imagine, so I had to exercise some caution to say the least. Dating is both a very good way to practice the local language, a fun way to gain insight into intimate relationships in the local culture, and I have had some good experiences in both Indonesia and Taiwan.



Attitudes towards women.



I think this is associated with the religion in Indonesia (Islam is the religion of over 85%!o(MISSING)f the registered population), because there are many apparent injustices in Islam regarding women. Men can marry multiple wives without chastisement, but women would not be treated the same if they were to have two husbands. This is a singular example, and I would abstain from giving many others, despite the sheer evidence for them in the culture. I really struggled with this particular cultural difference, because I loath an attitude that one group of people can be treated worse than another simply because of something that doesn't affect intelligence, curiosity, compassion, or any of the salient values within society. A friend of mine told me of a chastening experience where she was followed home by a man who proceeded to masturbate outside her gate. This wouldn't have happened if she'd been a man. This is the local culture, so unless something like this happens, you just have to keep quiet about it. I ranted with fellow foreigners about this aspect of the culture more often than any other, bar the religion. I once bumped into a veiled woman at the beach, and she fell down into the water, and her veil slipped off. She was terrified, and scrabbled for the veil, ignoring my fervent apologies, and offers of assistance. I was told firmly by my Indonesian friend that I should leave her to sort herself out, and had no idea why she was so perturbed by a small fall. He told me eventually that this was because she thought that because her veil had fallen off, and that I could see her hair, that I'd want to rape her. I felt appalling. I wanted to fly home very much that day. My friend then explained that this was a receding attitude to women, but that it was still prevalent in parts of Indonesia. Most young men consider it to be primitive, and it's slowly becoming an obsolete attitude, which can't happen soon enough, in my opinion.



I think it's worth adding, briefly, that I draw a clear distinction between a religious doctrinal text and the people who have faith based upon it. I have plenty of friends of all sorts of religions, and they're usually very open to a conversation about personal spirituality, including challenging atheist ideas that I often bring to such conversations. I have a personal dislike of the concept of organised religion, but I separate this dislike from individual people who are members of the religious communities that subscribe to whichever religion. Blah blah blah.



Guilt of colonialism, and my country's ongoing horrible behavior towards foreign countries.



This is unshakable for me. This is my view on the subject, and I'm sure it will sound pious, so be warned... Britain sells hideous weapons to horrible dictators, fights illegal wars, and spends more on nuclear missiles than on foreign aid. They lie about reasons for going to war, and keep secrets from the people. and then criticize other regimes for human rights abuses on the one hand, whilst funding/supporting them with the other for political/monetary gain. My government is complicit in, or responsible for, an awful lot of oppression, corruption, and murder the world over. I justify the last 3 lines of moaning by stating that we were involved in/complicit in the following; the occupation of East Timor (look it up, it's abominable that we manipulated a government to take so many lives for oil), the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, the destabilization of Libya, war in Syria, and this is just in my lifetime! I suspect most indigenous people here would never hold it against me, as I'm not in a position to stop any of the decisions made by my government at home, but it's still something I have felt bad about when I tell people where I'm from. Simply because I'm ashamed of our motivations of money and power, and our appalling record with regards to 'fighting terrorism', which seems to mean 'funding terrorism, until it gets too powerful, and then bombing the shit out of it.'





I did warn you it'd sound pious... Moving on!



Accommodation.



This is an issue because in the UK, standards are very high. In other countries, they are not so high. Especially in rural areas. Ants, inadequate air conditioning, other bugs, internet/phone, and so on. I had numerous issues with ants in Indonesia; they invaded my bedroom, and got on any food that wasn't sealed in airtight packaging. Ants also chewed through my phone line. If you leave a tiny morsel of food on a counter or table, expect to see a trail of ants bustling to and fro in the vicinity the next day. Most bugs/flies are an indication that you're not being fastidious about the cleanliness of your abode, so you can get rid of a large portion of them by being quite anal with cleaning, and throwing out rubbish. Cockroaches are fairly common too. I stepped on a cockroach, barefoot, in my first month in Indonesia. The crunch would've been satisfying if it had been a brown leaf. Instead it was a torrid hop to the bathroom and a vigorous attempt to remove yellow goo, and brown bits of exoskeleton from the sole of my foot... Whilst thinking of Men In Black quotes from the first movie "oh, I'm sorry! Was that your aunty?".



Variety of accommodation in Asia is pretty good, and cost is amazing. Homestays, hostels, and hotels are generally plentiful, and cheap. I prefer hostels/homestays if I can get them, as they involve meeting more people, and are generally cheaper than hotels. With regards to long-term housing, I have it relatively easy; mine was extremely cheap in Indonesia and it's also cheap in Taiwan. Also, I hardly had to lift a finger, as the schools I've worked for have assisted in the provision of accommodation in both the countries I've lived in so far.



Spare time.



It seems strange that it's possible to have lots of this in a new country where there it's possible to see something new every day. However, the reality is that my working hours are rarely more than 35 hours a week, and are often less than that. You start exploring, and having weekend trips, etc. However, because I teach in the afternoons, I have plenty of morning time that can be devoted to hobbies. I've taken up running, yoga, blogging, and have been reading about history/politics, and watching documentaries on the subjects. My biggest hobby in Indonesia was learning the local language. In Taiwan, it's probably hiking/trail walking. In the UK, my spare time was socially used due to having my close friends in close proximity. In foreign climes, there are fewer significant people in my life, and I've become a lot less interested in socializing, and more interested in pursuing some of the aforementioned hobbies.



Silly things.



These are tiny aspects of the local way of life that don't affect you remotely once you've settle in, but they can take a bit of getting used to. For example, you can drink the tap water in Indonesia, if you need a cure for constipation. I forgot numerous times during my first couple of weeks there, and would be waddling to the toilet less than an hour after I'd realized my mistake. There's no toilet roll in a lot of public toilets there either, so you have to carry a small supply, or use the aptly-named 'bum gun' to attempt to, ahem, squirt yourself clean. Without too much detail, there's a reason why Indonesian people only shake hands using their right hands. I'll let you work out the reason why, if you haven't already! Smoking in restaurants is fine in lots of countries, and it's a personal pet peeve of mine that I've had to tame somewhat since I've been out of the UK (where it's banned).



In Taiwan, there are very few rubbish bins on the streets. They are generally located inside shops, or on little carts that people push round periodically. I often carry rubbish for so long that I become emotionally attached to it, because there's no bin in sight. Also, there's no eating/drinking allowed on the subway system here, which means you can end up being a little dehydrated on long trips unless you get off the train for 10 minutes at a random stop, and chug some water. Drinking the tap water is also inadvisable here, due to high metal content (caused by cracks in numerous pipes).



"And it's all worth it because..."



Travelling around, and living in, other countries (and therefore cultures) is a massive privilege, and I wouldn't change most of the things that I've experienced during my time travelling. I maintain that I'm not particularly lucky, as anyone can do this, as long as you like kids/teaching, and as long as you can live through the long list of gripes and moans discussed above... without having a mental breakdown! The good stuff massively outweighs the bad stuff, and I've experienced things I'd never have seen if I'd stayed at home (as backpacking isn't for me, and I'm financially apathetic). I've been trekking in the jungle in Sumatra, to give one outstanding example. I fulfilled a childhood dream of seeing orangutans in the wild, camped in the jungle, and saw a tiny portion of the amazing wildlife of the rain forest. This particular trip remains my single favorite experience to date.

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