The Battle for Cold Mountain - Tony Tick vs. The Internet Whore 13/02-14/02/08 A few years ago, a movie by the name of Cold Mountain came out. I never saw it, mainly because it stars Renee Zellwegger, a woman of astonishingly little talent, who's only true skill appears to shaping her lips to perfectly imitate a tight, puckered arse. I'm guessing somewhere within this film, there is a mountain. I'm assuming that this mountain is a little nippy, perhaps containing features such as snow and icy winds, and that the residents of said mountain are frequently required to wear several layers of thick, warm clothing. I don't know where the film was set, or which mountain it was that kept relations frosty. All I know is, it can't have had shit on Tam Dao, without
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