Arrival in Vietnam - just the 2 of us

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Despite the stern posters in the cafe, we sneakily set aside a few pastries at our all-you-can-eat breakfast buffet, true traveller style, and headed off to Phnom Penh port for the ferry to Chau Doc in Vietnam's Mekong Delta. Had another interesting chat with a young Cambodian waiter whilst we waited; he told us how with the "financial crisis" lots of garment factories are closing in Cambodia and people are heading back to their rice paddies to survive. Also how to marry he would need an unattainable amount to cash to support the family; then, typically good-naturedly, he laughed at how rich we must be when we told him everyone had been affected in the West too - not really comparable...

Trip doesn't get off to a good start as 10 mins down the Tonle Sap channel we stop and are asked to sit out front in the baking sun to balance the boat whilst the crew investigate the engine. Being the only non-Vietnamese speakers it was frustrating not to be able to participate in various negotiations with passing boats, but eventually we are rescued by a bigger, better boat anyway and a couple of hours later we leave behind the sleepy fishing villages of huts and cows being watered on the wide Mekong, and arrive in far busier Vietnam - land of the conical hat indeed. Immigration procedures are a bit odd as the boat staff take our passports and disappear behind closed doors; we see no-one official and it's all very unfriendly but nonetheless our passports are stamped and we're in. After an hour of looking in wonder at vast sand-barges and processing plants, we are unceremoniously dumped at the jetty of some unknown posh hotel in Chau Doc and our bags are chucked out afterwards by the moody captain, doubtless annoyed at arriving late, because of our rescue. There are no Tuk-tuks, only tiny tri-shaws so we stagger towards town being constantly harassed by a hotel hawker on a motorbike who would not take no for an answer and maintained his monologue to the extent that we couldn't even hear each other the whole way! Other motorbikes swerve and park without glancing at pedestrians (there aren't many of us) and hawkers are very tactile and insistent. All very stressful, not helped by the fact that there are effectively no pavements in Chau Doc - all space is taken up by stalls, stands and parked motorbikes.

We find a cheap, friendly and superb hotel overlooking the main market and all the bustling people in their ubiquitous conical hats, for $15. They insist on taking our (temporary) passports which we had vowed not to leave unattended again since they can't be replaced now except back home, but we have no choice - apparently there are frequent police inspections. We doubt this, but next morning we come down for breakfast and the police, unconcerned by us standing customers, are taking up all the tables, inspecting away. After being awoken at 6am by the Party van driving the streets announcing the "news" (abridged no doubt) to the People, we aren't surprised by this rather invasive attitude.

Our first meal in Vietnam is fantastic: we arrive at an intimidating cafe full of slurping men, but are warmly welcomed and love our morning glory, noodles and squid. Next day is less fruitful as we try to find bus food in the bustling market and around but it's all noodles, rice and messy fruit. We find this often in Vietnam - street food is often meat and/or difficult to recognise and people speak little English; it's hard to find takeaway stuff even in shops, which just sell basic essentials, as people eat on the move, out or at home. On road trips though we see loads of lovely Vietnamese "ca-phes" with easy-chairs outside - harder to find in the places we stayed; they seem to be more of a traditional, rural thing.

Our bus trip to Cantho is tough - expensive, cramped minibus and no-one speaks English so we are not sure where to get off and end up at a distant terminal where an equal amount of English is spoken and we are just frowned at even when M attempts the phrasebook Vietnamese, so we can't buy our Saigon tickets and end up in a taxi, going the "scenic route" to the Ho Chi Minh statue marking the centre of town. Hotels are grotty, no-one, including signs, speaks English - this is the first place we've experienced where communication and orientation are so hard: tiring. After Lozz spectacularly falls down a staircase with his rucksack on, we call it a day and treat ourselves to Kim Tho Hotel - $40, fab with full exciting asian and western breakfast. Our evening Mekong-side walk reveals that the conical hats do come off in the evening, and everyone seems happy and relaxed, happily walking and chilling out and even showing cross-gender signs of affection - most unlike other Asian countries we've visited! Then there are lots of people playing sports and exercising when we head out next morning at 5.30am. All this strikes us as most unlike Cambodia where there weren't many leisure or communal activities to be seen. People seem less concerned with protocol than other places we've been lately, and more comfortable; society here is clearly more equal.

Our trip to Cang-Rai floating market - the biggest in the Mekong - was fascinating. We'd visited "Tourist Information" (before we realised such a thing doesn't really exist in Vietnam, because like most things here, it's a profit-making business!) and they didn't really speak English and tried to blag us onto an expensive boat trip. So we were pleased to make our own way to the port and meet Han, a woman boat-owner who took us out or 4 hrs to the market and canals on her traditional fishing boat with 2 wooden benches. We love seeing the boats buying from larger wholesalers and their advertising, consisting of hoisting their fruit up on a pole, and the picturesque orchards of jackfruit, rambutan, mango etc. But after hours of the propeller getting stuck (loads of rubbish and pollution), needing a wee, numb arses and being extorted by our "host" at an orchard (a smiling old guy who persuades us to eat his wife's soup and take rotten mangoes and then demands several $), we are pleased to get back on land! Han must feel sorry for us as she buys us 2 cunningly prepared pineapples - very cleverly peeled by the market women, if disgustingly held between their dirty feel etc. We head for lunch and order stir-fry, which transpires to be tempura. In the evening we admire the coloured roofs of Cantho from the hotel's panoramic bar and gag over nasty E-No lobster crisps, then enjoy salad with giant caterpillar (which M rescues of course); food and hygiene is a real gamble here.

For the next trip to Saigon/Ho Chi Minh City we are booked on a plush bus a million miles away from the previous minibus; often the price you pay, at least for tourists, seems arbitrary. We don't eat at the intimidating lunch stop as you have to be seated and order and the only thing we recognise is jarred ginseng and seahorse: grim. On arrival at HCMC we take a taxi to minihotel alley with a moaning French girl, and are immediately victims of an onslaught - leapt upon by people dragging us into their hostels, none of which we want to stay in - sinister or saggy beds. So we give in and, amusingly, take rooms in the An An2 hotel - the one Gemma (who is joining us - yippee!)had booked before we knew we'd be here earlier. We get a considerably cheaper price - everything has to be negociated here and it's tough because prices are rarely displayed unlike other countries we've been where you can just negociate a little on the market price. It gets exhausting when you are generally quoted an unfair price because you're a gullible tourist. However, when we head out or a well deserved beer (cheaper pavement place rather than one of the many very costly tourist bars, which do look nice...) we meet 2 Canadians, Andy and Andrew, who are not exhausted with it at all. They spend their time engaging hawkers and enjoy some bargains and sometimes being more-or-less spat at. They love the banter. The Saigon beer must help: it is very good. We spend the evening confirming this and meet them again same place next day for more Saigon-fuelled chats and fun!

Sunday next day so we head out for breakfast; lots of bad English breakfasts in this tourist ghetto but we are missing nice coffee after Cambodia and Thailand: it's either bitty or treacle here. We try to get a tri-shaw to the botanical gardens but the price is 5 times more than we've been told we should pay and we can't get it down so we take a taxi instead - the right price! Gardens are fascinating: loads of Vietnamese strolling , picnicking and staring at us, perhaps because of Laurent's bandana and baseball boots (people keep asking him if he's American); conversely we stare at their socked feet in flip-flops, sweaters and thick face masks so many wear: it's so hot! Shame the gardens are interspersed with the zoo so we can't avoid seeing cages civets and lemurs in corners nobody looks at and tethered elephants in the sun :-( After the disappointing history museum (lots of replicas and little info in English) we go back to our tourist spot for street food: oily noodles and sauce are plonked on plate and served totally cold; bit nicer when we ask for them heated up!

The day has come for Gemma's arrival: we have been looking forward to seeing her and injecting some new blood into this travelling team. We can't make head or tail of the bus station despite asking staff but eventually the right bus for the airport does arrive and is exceedingly cheap for an hour's ride. At the airport, everyone is waiting outside in the heat and there are security staff checking passports if you even want to enter the A/C terminal building, but there are no shops or even a newspaper in there anyway! We manage to get in up to the ghost-town viewing gallery and await Gem for an hour with more horrid coffee. We really should give up on it! When Gem arrives she and Laurent exclaim about how slim each other look (I have put on about a stone since we left the UK; I seem to need to eat more than Laurent every day!), and we are overjoyed to be reunited. Gem is tired - no sleep - but excited by the conical hats as we board the bus into central HCMC again.

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