The Journey Begins: Condoms, Nibbling Fish, and Rhinoceros Beetles

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The pink condom is 5 baht more expensive than the green one. And the toothbrush costs half as much as the green condom. That's what the sign says in the bathroom of my hotel room, where these toiletries are displayed.



So begins my 2 month sojourn in Southeast Asia, my first overnight in a small hotel near the Bangkok airport. I'm staying here just one night before my flight in the morning to Chiang Mai, in northern Thailand.



Every trip starts in a similar manner: the excitement, the dreams, the expectations of adventure. The initial surprise of something a bit curious. Sorting out the money exchanging, packing and repacking the bag, trying to work out a system so that each little item has its own place in the bag, so that I don't spend lots of time looking for my things. I'm proud that I stuffed all my needs in one carry-on bag and a small backpack. It is good to know I can buy a pink condom from my room in the hotel, because I did not have room to pack one.



It's the details that I'm training myself to see. Like noticing the sweet, fake orange juice that is served everywhere, because real fruit juice is a little too expensive. And the "American breakfast" option, that consists of eggs, ham, bacon, and sausage. Yuk. I ask for fried rice with eggs and vegetables instead. The single ply toilet paper that is used for napkins and hand towels in the bathroom. Trust me, it doesn't work well for hand drying. The Thai massage places that are everywhere, the greenery, the quiet lanes tucked beyond the busy roads where people drive on the left side. People pay me no mind, they see lots of foreigners, but they are available to point me to a good restaurant for noodles or whatever.



My first meal in Chiang Mai is at a place that prepares Vietnamese soup. I crave noodles, which I slurp up with delight. Then I walk, tentatively, a bit around this place. I get a massage from a 30 year old Karen woman, who is still unmarried. She tells me her mother worries about her marital status, but she says she likes being single. My head is pounding from the travel, I go to bed early.



I walk around the city with Wi, my Thai guide, who takes me through the local market. We talk with an 84 year old woman selling decorations for the upcoming full moon festivities. She is absolutely gorgeous, with a glowing smile. She asks me my age. Wi is proud of me, I answer in Thai. The woman proudly says she's never been to the hospital. I admire all the handmade flowers, plastic wrapped dried food, candles, baskets, incense, bottled oils and other things. I try a dried up red thing from China. Tastes like a prune. We head off to find a tailor to stitch up the silk that I bought into dainty pajamas.



Tailors are amazing. They measure and make scattered notes, and say, yep, they can do this. This woman knows what she's doing. No pattern. She draws a rough picture, and I agree. The express service, for I need my new pajamas that day, costs me extra. But my silk pajamas serve me well; I feel quite luxurious as I wear them.



Wi walks with me around the old city of Chiang Mai, and I visit ancient Buddhist temples and pose with a statue of a very handsome red robed monk who is fat and resembles a Buddha.



I'm warned by a sign at the entrance to beware the scammers, well dressed men who hang around at the entrance to try to scam the tourists. Of course there are no scammers at these temples with the signs, but sure enough, I see them lurking at one without a sign. I'm very smart, though, and wave them off when they try to charm me.



We happen on a Buddhist ceremony inside one of the temples, where people sitting and praying have strings from above tied around their heads. This has something to do with drawing out some undesirable parts of their lives.



I laugh at Wi; she is such a good photographer, and is never shy about marching into places to get a great shot. I am so happy to see her; I know her from another tour that I did in Myanmar earlier in the year. She and her husband do lots of guiding for the tour company that he started.



My visit to Chiang Mai is not complete until I go to the night market. Here Wi talks me into sticking my feet into the tanks of water where the nibbling fish hang out. Hundreds of them peck at my feet, searching for lovely dead skin to eat. The sign says they stimulate circulation, a kind of "fish reflexology." It is overwhelming, they keep pecking. Wi assures me they will go away after the initial cleaning. She's wrong. I must have a lot of dead skin. Another man sticks his feet in the tank where I sit, and he complains that the fish aren't nibbling his legs. Only when I pull my feet out does he get the full experience of little fish nipping at one's feet.



We drive to Chiang Rai, north. Along the way we stop at the hot springs, where local people sell quail eggs and bamboo shoots to cook in the hot water. But the best part of the stop is the rhinoceros beetles. They are stunning. The little man with the straw hat and long pole is knocking them out of the tree and bagging them up. It is the season for these wonderful creatures. They sell them for 50 baht each, and people fight them. Yes, it's true, we see a billboard along the road that is advertising the upcoming beetle fights Oct. 18!



And a wonderful sign for a convenience store: "Cabbage and Condoms." I am in such disbelief, I do not speak fast enough to get a photo.



I wish I could see the beetle fights. I wish I could have stopped at the cabbage and condoms store.



But onward, to Chiang Rai, and then to the international border with Laos!!

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Photos

First Lunch in Chiang Mai
...I'm in heaven--papaya salad and other tasty delights.

Rhinoceros beetle
Sometimes called Staghorn beetle

The Fat Monk
...who looks like a Buddha

The Market
Handmade flowers, incense, oils, candles, all things bright and showy

Beware the Scammer
Who hangs out at temple entrances.

Getting Fitted
A master tailor measures me for a new pair of silk pajamas.

Wi
Wi, who lives in Chiang Mai, is traveling with me for a few days. She's gobs of fun.

Temple in Chiang Mai old city
One of the important temples that has survived centuries

Monk Figures
Made of wax.

In the Nibbler Fish Tank
Chiang Mai night market.