January 22 - Day 17 in Thailand

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It’s Monday, and we were back to business. We were able to “sleep-in” and have breakfast at 8:30. I guess I’ll take what I can get. I had to spend the rest of my morning working on the presentation. I have a lot of work to do given that I agreed to make the powerpoint in addition to the researching. I using enjoy making powerpoints, but I’m feeling a little salty about it since other people are out having fun right now. I get a little “FOMO” when I’m doing schoolwork simply because I enjoy adventure and exploring. I felt rushed all morning but thank goodness I spent 30 minutes to work out, though it was just a short time compared to my usual workouts. Everyone seems stressed out of their mind, and I have no idea why. I’m grateful that I spent time taking care of myself today or else I would have surely lost it on some people. My biggest internal reaction is when I feel as if I am being talked to disrespectfully, especially when I feel undeserving of what they are saying to me. There was a lot of miscommunication this morning, and for some reason all the issues got pinned on me. I have no idea why, but sometimes I think this is the downfall of being the calmest person in the room. You’re the easiest person to attack. I kept telling myself to not take things personally, everyone handles stress differently, and that I was going to let other people steal my joy. It’s not fair for my joy to be taken away when I have spent intentional time of getting my mind, body, and spirit in the right space. I also was so grateful that I had read some of my book this morning too. It’s called <em style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">Chasing the Dragon by Jackie Pullinger. In the chapter I read, it talked about praying in tongues whenever she felt angry, upset, threatened, etc., so I did just that. It helped me moved forward so much better and react in a more godly manner than I would have had I not reached out to God to calm my spirit. He’s good, and I know I need to see with His eyes not my own. After all, we are to be like Him, and He says love is patient and slow to anger! And it doesn’t help that I am super cautious with words. I think they matter so much, so I focus a lot of time on “taming my tongue.”



Presentation time was fine. I’m going to be honest. I think everyone was very bored, but it was funny to note that all students are the same around the world. Across from me, I counted three students sleeping, five students on theirs phones, and many students whispering to one another during the presentations. It was funny to note the difference in presentations here. When it was Q&A time, no students asked questions. It was also interesting how teachers (AJ.s) whispered throughout the presentations. There was always white noise in the background of people talking. It is definitely more relaxed here in this sense which seems counter to their culture of high respect.



After the presentation, we went back to our rooms. Melissa said she felt sick with a headache and chills. I felt her forehead, which was burning, and insisted she check her temperature (which was 101F) and take some Tylenol. I felt bad that she had to stay back at BCNC while the rest of us planned to go out to the Chiang Mai University Market. I don’t think she missed much though because there was a heck of a lot of tension going on in the evening — unfortunately carrying over form the morning. Some girls were offended that not everyone was invited to hangout with hospital staff while others were frustrated by the few of us who aren’t so time oriented. On time to them meant “ten of” the time we needed to be there; whereas some of us saw on time as being there at the time stated. Because these people were already on edge, there was no room for other people to be themselves and be more flexible. It can be tough to be a “P” in the Meyers Briggs testing in a room of nursing majors who tend to be very organized and detail oriented. It’s always been a learning curve for me, but I would say it’s even more intensified in new situations. I think people feel like they need some control in their lives, like in Thailand where everything is up in the air. I get it, but we all need to meet in the middle. I will be on time. I won’t be late, but you also need to realize that you can’t make everyone be 10 minutes early. it’s the small things that seem to be blown out of proportion, but maybe I just see them as small? For some it’s a big deal? I don’t know. It’s been a very interesting group of girls to watch haha. I’m just psyched that I got a freakin’ awesome strawberry milk t-shift.

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