Wedding crasher

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I started this weekend hoping to get a good view of the Annapurnas from the top of Sarangkot (1600m) unfortunately the view was obscured by cloud but the two hour trek up was good exercise. I met some really nice local people on the way up and I spoke to them about their simple lives of farming.

Hari (now known as my unofficial Nepalese fixer) asked if i wanted to attend an engagement and wedding of one of his friends. I was taken aback by this offer but I knew he wouldn't put me in a situation where I wasn't welcome.

The engagement began with many people drinking ginger tea and multiple hands on knees which I am used to by now! Everyone was so sweet when I arrived at their house totally unannounced saying "welcome" and the groom even thanked me for coming! I spent most of the evening watching what people did so I didn't make any faux pas during the rituals (which were numerous). I couldn't help but notice the bride had her head bowed the whole time and I asked what this meant. It was explained to me that this was an arranged marriage and "all the women do it"

I was given a tika which is made of yoghurt, red colouring and rice. There were lots of stares especially from the children but a sweet old man gave me yoghurt when he saw I was struggling with the heat of the food. The food by the way was amazing as expected.

Two days later was the wedding and I joined Hari in his home for dahl baht. There was eating with hands, burping, farting and one lady was sitting on the floor. I always have so many questions, but I assumed she was sitting there based on cast system (which is still very prevalent).

So...the big day!

It all started at 10am (1130 nepali time) and there was much celebration and colour. Hari dissapeared and I asked where he had gone. He went to wisper a tantric chant in the groom's ear! We started by eating a large delicious meal which I later found out was for sustenance as all the rituals finished at 5pm!

I was welcomed again and people were even asking where I was!

There were innumerable interesting rituals. One of which involved washing the feet of the bride and groom and drinking the water. I have a great video of this! There was tika giving, knot tying and coloured lines drawn on their foreheads high up indicating that they were now married.

I was welcomed as a friend into the family with a further tikka, hat and blessing. I wanted to give a gift but I couldn't as I was from the groom's side. It seems like females have a slightly tough gig here! I was even told to push in front of the women in line which I did feel awkward about.

The one stand thing for me was how much the bride was crying throughout the whole ceremony. She looked so unhappy and everyone was laughing and enjoying themselves around her.

It definitely is not my place to make comment on this as I am culturally unaware of what goes on. Either way this was a wonderful experience for me and I feel totally priviledged to have been part of it.

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Photos

Manu
I spoke to Manu for about half an hour. He was such a nice guy, he didn't even try to sell me stuff!

Buffet
For you lucy!

Comments

[Mary Karnikowski]

Wow!
What a fantastic experience! You're very lucky. But the poor bride does look SO unhappy in all the photos.