Leaving Kathmandu

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Even though after the early morning yesterday for the (non) Everest flight, I couldn't sleep in this morning. Maybe it was a mixture of my disjointed body clock, or eager anticipation of excitement to get home. I showered, and met Lesley for breakfast at the place down the end of the road that we'd visited on the first night. Keiran had opted to stay in bed a bit longer, so Lesley and I chatted over an omelette and coffee.



The weather was overcast and it had rained in the night, so I doubted the Everest flight would have gone ahead this morning, and was silently thankful I hadn't opted for a second day just to be disappointed again. As I said, it would have been pushing it as well to get my flight home. I had wanted to do a bit of last minute souvenir shopping, but not many places were open. I did manage to buy a scarf that I'd had my eye on since India, similar to what Shakira had bought at the start of the trip. It was so colourful and beautiful and would really go with anything. I did barter down a bit, not as much as I'd liked, but was happy I got my colourful scarf. I bought a little Nepalese flag as well, to go with the other ones on my 'bookshelf of tat/travels' it was such a unique shape, like two triangles on a side. I thought of the man in Durbar Square, happily waving the huge flag and saluting outside of the Kumari Palace. I think I'd be reminded of him every time I looked at my little flag.



I half wished I'd of changed some more money and bought more presents for people, but figured I don't always have to buy gifts and it also depends on what the backpack allows. I'd bought some scarves and bracelets for the girls, and the Kukri for Daryl. I figured for what I lacked in bringing back in souvenirs, I'd make up for by returning with an appreciation the smaller simple things in life. Back at the hotel, I said goodbye to Steph and thanked her once again for being my sleep saviour! The Aussies and me got a cab to the airport (cue more bad driving) which only took 20 minutes. We'd allowed an hour so had plenty of time to kill. When we got there we discovered this wasn't necessarily a good thing as Kathmandu airport is so small and boring! I bid farewell to my bag and hoped the Kukri knife would make it to the other side. I wasn't sure if you have to declare it or not, but no one asked me 'hey are you carrying a huge knife?!' So I didn't volunteer the information. Once through security I waited at the other side for Lesley and Kerian and we chatted until it was time for my flight (they were an hour after me) there weren't many screens displaying flight information, yet there were plenty showing the cricket and what most people seemed to be engrossed in. Finally it was time to board so I bid farewell to the Aussies, whom I'd really enjoyed meeting on this trip, and found my seat with excitement and anticipation of getting home and seeing DSJ.



I looked out of the window as the plane took off: Goodbye Himalayas, Goodbye Kathmandu, Goodbye Nepal! I felt exhausted. I was looking forward to getting home, to a place where children don't have to beg, where a mangey dog doesn't rifle through a mountain of rubbish and where street corners are mainly free from beggars with terrible limb deformaties. A place where the provision of Oral cancer treatment is one of the best in the world (and the incidence isn't as great as in Nepal as we don't use chewing tobacco like it's going out of fashion) to a place where my clothes are clean not dirty and bedraggled, and a place where my family won't sell me (even though there have probably been times over the years they wished that was an option) a place where although inequality still exists, it's nothing on the scale of the inequality that women here will encounter. Back to a place where I went to school to get an education, and became literate (despite the probably spelling and grammar mistakes dotted throughout this blog!) I felt lucky. Extremely lucky not only to be born and brought up in the UK, but to be born female and have the opportunities that until now I never appreciated many women in the world just don't have. This trip for me had been a real eye opener with regards to that, especially after the SASANE Sisterhood of Survivors project visit.



I sat back and flicked through the films and settled on 'Wild' a film with Reese Witherspoon based on a true story about a woman who just buggers off from life to walk the Pacific Coast Trail. The first thing I noticed was her blue checked shirt that is like my favourite Abercrombie and Fitch one I've had for years and can't seem to part with. What are you getting away from? What are your reasons? The voiceover commented. Hmmm it made me wonder about myself. She checks into a motel and when they ask her for her details she explains she's between addresses right now. It reminded me of the conversation I'd had with Steph yesterday when she'd asked me for mine. Do I give the address of my house even though I don't really live there? Or do I give my work address, even though, well, I don't really work there anymore. Do I give Daryls address, even though I haven't yet moved there and not sure what date I will be. Hell-where do I live? so many changes going on when I get back 'home' wherever 'home' was to be. What are you getting away from? What are your reasons?

Reese continues on her walk and gets stopped by a man to interview her. He asks if she's a hobo, she gets offended and denies this. 'You have no home, and no job, you must be a hobo' again I thought of myself. True I have a house, but it isn't home. I have a job, for now, but in less than 3 months this will change. Am I a hobo? The song played in my head 'until tomorrow, I'll just keep moving on.....' What are you getting away from? What are your reasons?

There is a scene when her mother dies from cancer. 'F888 you St Patrick' screamed Reese as she walks back from the hospital past people celebrating St Patrick's day. Hmm, that's tomorrow, I thought. St Patrick's day is tomorrow, and tomorrow will be the 28th year to the day, that my Dad passed away, from the thief that calls itself cancer. Reese returns to the hospital, distraught that her mothers eyes have already been removed for organ donation-the same as my Dad, who by the end only could donate his corneas as every other organ wasn't viable. What are you getting away from? What are your reasons? Cue to the church scene where she's at her mothers grave, headstone reading : born August 18th...... My birthday. Wow, so many similarities I thought. The end of the film came and the second name down after the directors was Screenplay by Nick Hornby........What are you getting away from? What are your reasons?



I'm no Reese Witherspoon (clearly) and not hiking alone on the PCT, but it did make me think. what am I getting away from? What are my reasons? And deep down I suppose I've always thought of my Dad in everything I do. He died at no age-33 and I suppose that has made me just want to get out and see and do as many things as I can, whilst I can. I think from a young age I always knew I'd move away from Hull, I don't know why or where, and I don't see it as moving onto something 'better' as such, but I just knew I wanted something different in life. I sometimes wish I could be one of those people who is happy with doing the same thing everyday and has such incredibly deep ties to a place that that can never see themselves living anywhere else. That's just not me, I wish it was (it would be a whole lot cheaper!) but it's not. I have the urge to just keep seeing, just keep moving and just keep experiencing the amazing place that is the world. I think of all the things my Dad never got to do, all the opportunities I've had and amazing places I've been that he would never get to see. I don't know even if he would have wanted to, but my mum did once tell me he went backpacking through Norway back in the day. At least I think it was Norway. I only really learned this a few years ago, when she finally dug his backpack and frame out of the loft to sell at a car boot sale.



So what am I getting away from? A life that otherwise, for me would seem unfulfilled if I did the same thing day in day out. What are my reasons? I'd be lying if I said I wasn't gutted when I learned I was to be made redundant, but at the same time, I had always wanted to go travelling. A career break wasn't an option at the time due to my terms of service, so I made the most of the leave I had, trying to get away and visit as many places. 'Do it whilst your young!' People would say. 'Do it before you have children!' I had all this time off and the money to do it (ok visa lent me some) so if I don't do it now, I never will. I worried about spending all this time away when I should be back finding a job. Then I realised I didn't actually care about getting a job, I'd regret not doing this more than I would regret missing out on a job. Daryl was so busy with work and uni, it was a great time for me to be away out of his hair (the little bit he has) and finally I could scratch that travelling itch I've had for so long. I'll be 33 on my next birthday. My dad didn't get to see 34. I definitely think life is too short, even if you die at 90 let alone 33. My first trip was over, but my travels were only beginning, and I thought to myself, at least when my time comes to fall off this earth and eventually die, at least I can go with the knowing that I've seen a lot of it, and lived.

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