Kathmandu, Nepal - Part II

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Wednesday 2-16 to Saturday 2-19 (Continued)
But onto Kathmandu! Armed with Lonely Planet, we headed out to explore the city and its open markets, hidden temples and colorful shop fronts. The most impressive places to visit were the various Durbar Squares. Hundreds of years ago, Kathmandu Valley was split into three small kingdoms: Kathmandu, Bhaktapur and Patan (all World Heritage Sites). Each kingdom had a central palace surrounded by temples and markets, known as durbar squares. These ancient cities were beautiful, with ornately carved temples covered in hand crafted metal works and stone carvings of both Buddhist and Hindu figures. More than any other place we’ve visited so far, Nepal has been a fluid blend of Buddhism and Hinduism, which amazes me because Western religions pride themselves on being different and separate one from the other. But here, religion is such a pervasive part of life; it is in everything – how one dresses, how men & women are treated, how you address each other, what you eat, how you wear your hair – with religious symbols everywhere (on homes, businesses, temples). [Nick Note: We visited a village in Chitwan, Nepal and the family had a large poster of Jesus Christ on the wall; so a tourist asked if the family is Christian. No, they had posters of Christ and Hindu and Buddhist Gods, they just thought it was a cool poster.]

We took a sight seeing route to visit 3 separate UNESCO World Heritage Sites that perfectly embodies this religious cohesion. Two of the sites were Buddhist pilgrimage sites, set high atop the hills overlooking Kathmandu Valley (which from up there looks huge!). When Tibet was a free and open country, Boudhanath used to be a key pilgrimage site to seek blessings for a safe passage over the mountains. Now it has become a central location for Tibetan refugees. The giant stuppa (1 hectare in width!) is said to represent the Adibuddha (first Buddha) and is covered in swaths of saffron paint. It’s topped with giant images of Buddha’s eyes (looking in all 4 directions) and the Buddhist symbol for one (looks like the nose), representing the unity of all people. Oddly enough, we ran into an older American couple here who used to be Peace Corps volunteers in Costa Rica. Small world! They were there in the late 1960s, well before Nick’s dad, so they weren’t familiar with his family, but it was fun to reminisce about Costa Rica with them.

Swayambhunath, or Monkey Temple, was another experience all together. In addition to all the macaques running around, the sky line was covered in prayer flags and we had the opportunity to watch monks chanting and playing music in prayer. Instead of a large crowd of foreign tourists, this stuppa actually had a lot of Nepali visitors, some coming to check out the view and others ceremoniously spinning the prayer wheels, as everyone checked out the latest lightening damage. Several days before we arrived, there was a huge rain storm, during which a lightening bolt struck one of the towers – ironic since this stuppa is said to symbolize the power of lightening.

The most interesting site was Pashupatinath, a Hindu pilgrimage site and center for religious cremations. As non-Hindus, we were not allowed into the temples, but a walked us around and explained the ceremonies going on. This was the first time Nick and I had witnessed a cremation ceremony, 4 of which were going on during our visit. The cremations are performed on stone slabs next to the river, so that the remains end up in the holy water (of course, this is the same place where people dump trash, take ritual baths, dump their effluent, and wash their clothes). The slabs are separated into sections and reserved for different levels of the caste system; merchants are not allowed to be cremated in the same location as Brahmans, etc. The bodies are brought in, wrapped in white cloths. Their feet are washed in the river and family members pour river water into their mouths as a blessing. The bodies are then draped in ornate orange cloths (at least the ones we saw were; it might be different for different castes) and stacked on a wooden pyre, then covered in more wood. While the body is set ablaze, family members stand around and sing prayers. I’m not sure how long it takes to completely burn a body, but it seems to go quickly. A couple cremations had made quite a lot of progress in the short hour that we had been there. The family collects the ashes after the ceremony and holds onto them for a year. One year after cremation, the family returns to the river to spread the ashes and perform a remembrance ceremony – a couple of which we also witnessed. It was a mysterious and fascinating experience all together.

Combine this devout religious lifestyle with a strict caste system (which has officially been outlawed in Nepal but is still very much alive) and I was one dumbfounded Westerner. I found aspects of it incomprehensible, uncomfortable, and in some cases insulting, but still fascinating to see how much lifestyles can differ on opposite sides of the world when you have a completely different perspective and cultural belief system. While we may think it sucks to live in such poverty or to be an Untouchable, there’s really no “rags to riches” concept in Nepal like we have in the US. Regardless of caste, there’s a strong since of fidelity to your caste level and social community. Intercaste marriages are a rare and relatively new thing that, as you can imagine, come with their own set of difficulties and social stigmas. [Nick Note: The caste system is ancient and was basically based on your work, so religious men and teachers were Brahmans, the highest caste, and merchants were in the second caste. However, there are many new professions so there were three new platforms at Pashupati beyond the original 4; one was for royalty, a second was for “VIPs” which our guide said would be like the President, ministers and scientists, and then a third for casteless people who like foreigners. I wondered if engineers would be in the “VIP” section with the “scientists” but couldn’t get and answer, I think that was a nice was of avoiding having to tell me that over there engineers are part of the Untouchables.]

The role of women in Nepali society was heartbreaking for me. A strong, ingrained system of patrimony goes back centuries. Women traditionally have very few rights. They only receive the most basic education if any. While they’re male siblings will go on to higher education, they will be sold in marriage and most likely never see their family again. Women are treated more like property and cheap labor. Men receive more education because they are seen as the family’s financial security. It is their duty to continue to take care of their parents well into old age; therefore, such efforts and expenses like higher education and employment are not wasted on most women who, when married, are sent to live at their husband’s family, where they will be responsible for running the household, raising the children and taking care of most hard labor. While we saw women working in the fields, carrying heavy loads of firewood and produce, taking care of livestock, working in construction, the men mostly sat around enjoying their day. Those that didn’t have a small shop or rickshaw to run could be seen hanging out with other men, playing board games, enjoying their tea and tobacco. Women do most of the work and receive none of the wages (women own less than 10% of all property in the country). All money goes to the husbands and he can spend it however he likes. If a woman has a job before she is married, the new husband can decide whether she continues to go to work or not. When the husband dies, she has little right to his money or property and may be forced to leave the family (in-laws) while her children stay behind. We were told women are discouraged from even going out at night alone without a male escort; those that do are considered prostitutes. With the understanding that there are always exceptions – some men are more progressive than others and some women do receive higher education and choose to assert their independence with or without a husband – I have to say, and I know it isn’t nice, but I’m glad I’m not Nepali.

The highlight of Kathmandu was a side trip Nick has been looking forward to for months. He booked us a morning plane ride over the Himalayas to see Mt. Everest! Go figure, our seats were right over the wing, which blocked half the view, but the Himalayas were amazing! Breathtaking and spectacular, they seemed to go on forever – snow capped mountains jutting up between giant glaciers – it was beautiful! We got some great views of Everest and I’m happy to say that’s all I will ever need! I love hiking and seeing new places, but I have absolutely NO desire to mountain climb, let alone willingly force myself to climb a famously brutal peak in freezing cold temperatures, with little oxygen and greater chance of bodily harm or death than success. Pass! But it was beautiful to see from the comfort of an airplane ;o)

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