Good will to all men - apart from those living in a longhouse

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Apparently to experiance the "real Borneo" you need to go and stay in a longhouse. With this in mind we headed up the Batang Rejang river in search of the Iban people whose hospitality is legendary.

Unfortunately no one had informed our hosts of their legendary hospitality and we ended up getting stuck for two very uncomfortable nights as unwelcome guests in a traditional longhouse. A longhouse is essentially a high rise but instead of housing 50 families vertically they house them horizontally - space is not a premium here.

While our hosts ate rice, buttered bread and drank coffee, Tom and I were left to eat on the floor with dry crackers. We got the message loud and clear but with no public transport and no phone signal we were stuck where we were until the tour guide came to get us.

Deciding to make the most of our situation Tom and I went to explore the surrounding jungle. In an effort to combat the leaches we headed off wearing knee high football socks - white in colour so that you can see them when they land on you. While this seemed perfectly logical to us the residents of the longhouse had one more reason to alienate us.

We trekked off to the sniggers of the locals who knew that leaches didn't reside in this particular jungle. While we might have lost a little dignity and propogated the idea that English people like wearing knee high socks and shorts we at least managed to find a waterfall which became our refuge.

It seems that 'good will to all men' and the spirit of the festive season has not quite made it this far into the jungle!

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