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Published: December 18th 2006
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V.V. countryside
Just south of town at the bridge crossing. I don't mean to blame Vang Vieng itself for the low success ratio. Although i haven't really let it off the hook entirely. Vang Vieng is the kind of place that exists because it's between two other travel destinations (ie-Luang Prabang and Vientianne.) They've catered to the backpacker quite successfully and rather extensively. It has plenty of facilities for us mangy westerners, but it's gone so far as to suck the very soul out of us wanderers. It is here however that I wish to seperate Vang Vieng the town from the surrounding countryside.
Vang Vieng the town:
The last thing I want to do while in such a wonderous land as Laos is watch American basic television programming. However...and I still haven't forgiven myself for participating but I'll explain later...that seems to be what's on tap here. Perhaps it has something to due with the last page of every menu which reads "happy" before all options. It would appear people come to this remote corner of the world just to get baked on mushroom shakes or opium crab cakes, or whatever. And in order to compete for all this stoner money, the restaurants (with a few exceptions),
V.V. countryside
The bus ride from Luang Prabang to Vang Vieng is very windy and very scenic. Beautiful. Look how that cliff looks ready to peel right off! have built loungy, dirty (imagine a pillow sitting outside for 5 years without ever being cleaned, then lounge in a handful of them), not terribly comfortable, opium den like seating. That alone wouldn't be deserving of my rant however there is nothing sociable about this set up. Rather than sitting around a central table or mingling about, everything is faced one direction as if to remind us, "look this way you lazy stoners, we are going to entertain you with non-stop 'Friends' marathons and Simpson episodes." Now I know what you're thinking right now..."come on, you're kidding right?" Sadly, no, no I am not. And so rather than meet other travellers and share interesting stories, trade secrets and give advice, everyone just 'zones out.' Now to be completely fair, there is atleast one bar with a pool table and generally it was busy, but socializing is not this town's specialty. I even heard there are some late night bars across the river that stay open until 3 or 4 am (V.V. closes around 11pm), but to be honest I couldn't stay awak long enough to get past the 'Friends' episodes. So atleast V.V. is good for catching up on sleep.
Misty Limestone Mountains
Looking out over the river just north of Vang Vieng. Vang Vieng the countryside:
V.V. absolutely can redeem itself with its caves, rivers, and massive limestone rock mountains rising abruptly from flat river vallerys. In fact, perhaps the whole town is meant to keep people out of this cherished landscape. It's too precious for the average traveller and anyone who can manage to overcome the temptation of 'Friends' will be rewarded with a truly wonderful experience.
Cave exploration here is how it should be. Perhaps you pay a small fee to someone. Maybe you rent a 'torch' (aka flashlight.) And then you're told not to get killed while inside. Good for them. No ruined natural wonders with cement steps and steel grating over crevasses. Nope. If you want to go over a 20 foot drop you can walk over the half hazardly thrown down bamboo stalks and try not to slip off. It allows the common explorer to actually use their sense of judgement. It's enough to make an American like me thrill with delight that someone hasn't already decided I'm too stupid and uncoordinated to walk over slippery bamboo bridges. Of course I wouldn't say they're wrong but I got to decide what risks to expose myself to and I made it over and back just fine.
A Quebecoise fellow I met in Luang Prabang managed to run into a French couple doing some mountain climbing on the rather brittle limestone cliffs throughout the area and do some lead climbing. I'm glad I wasn't with him or I'm sure someone would have insulted my manhood, then I would've had to shakily climb to nowhere halfway up an exposed rock face, admire the view without pissing myself, and then do my best to look cool rapelling back down even though all I could think about was the amazing ride the harness was giving me. But he told me it was stellar and I bet I would have felt the same later as I retold my brush with death at the pub over season 3 of 'Friends.'
One activity I was very surprised to actually enjoy was the 'tubing.' I think we all know what 'tubing' is. And if not, it usually means towing a 12 pack of beers down a river behind a tractor inner tube which you have just plugged with your out of shape behind. I'd read about in the Lonely Planet and heard about it since arriving in town but it just sounded a little too touristy and boring for me. But some rather respectably adventerous folks vouched that it was indeed quite fun, I decided to give it a go. Hell, anything is better than sitting through season 12 of 'Friends.' What I found was that the local entrepreneurs have upgraded this rather snail paced activity with some spectacular high wire events. What I'm sure started as simple bars for beer refueling along the river banks has turned into a competitive business of who can build the most dangerous swing. Fantastic! The zip lines weren't too intimidating until you looked at what the lines were tied to or how the take off stands were built. But really they're just a warm up for "The Flying Fox" anyway. The Flying Fox is a 30 foot fulcrum extending up and over the river, with one long steel cable stretching from its tip to a take off point high in a tree fort about 27 feet down river. It's like standing on top of the Seattle Tennis Club high dive, grabbing hold of a slippery metal bar, then whizzing just above the water's surface at a low point 30 feet away, then ascending upwards in a long arc in order to let go at the highest point possible and land in the water some 60 feet from where you started. For those with bad timing and an early release, you might just end up 70 feet away, on your back, and grasping for air as you resurfaced. (that's assuming you do resurface of course.) Personally I went for as much height as possible but always with my feet towards the circling globe beneath me. Others went for impressive flips and dives which are dutifully recorded on my little digicam. In the true Lao spirit, they built this thing just big enough, and sketchily enough, so as to make sure it was a little dangerous. Our friend Mark from Vancouver (BC) was reminded of this after an unsuccessful double back flip attempt, coming up coughing unusually warm thick red water? No, no, that would be blood from his lungs... about a cupfull for the fishes. So the challenge stands. Should anyone pull off a double back flip on the Flying Fox, record it, and send it my way, I'll send you the complete final season of 'Friends' on DVD.
So why only 1 great day of 5? Day 1 was spent in horror of all the TVs and general 'zombie-ism', while days 3-5 were spent in front of those very TVs, not far from my hostel bathroom, due to fried rice poisoning at The Flying Fox bar. But hey, at least they got the swing right!
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Mark
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A long awaited entry :D
Heya Pete!! Finally an entry! :D And I even got a shout out in it. Nice to know you're still alive. Keep the updates coming. Take care Mark