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Published: November 20th 2009
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Almaty
Zenkov Cathedral
Most people who think of Kazakhstan, think of Borat. Most people who have been to Kazakhstan might think of Almaty its former capital, and then there are some who decide to discover what the rest of the country might be like.
I decided to go up north, and to keep me company along the way I went with an English man who went by the name of Tim, whom I had met in a rather decrepit dormitory in Almaty. Before long we were on a train riding up the steppes of Kazakhstan and I learned my first lesson on this country. Most of it is steppe! Flat, dry, and in winter cold, with a shade of white. Second lesson, the capital was moved from Almaty to Astana, which wasn't called Astana at the time. Astana means capital in Kazakh, so they renamed some shitty little town Capital and moved the capital there. At least you won't have to worry about remembering the name of the town. I can imagine the geography lessons in a Kazakh classroom. 'So what is the capital of our great country?'.... 'Ehhh... Capital, sir? Splendid, right you are!'
Now Kazakhstan is also a rather expensive
Almaty
Kazakh-British Technical University
country to travel in, so I decided to do a spot of couchsurfing, and Tim who was a slightly more experienced couchsurfer than me (not so difficult since this was my first time) contacted several hosts in Astana to ask for their couch. Lo and behold, a gentle soul by the name of Azim was so kind to offer us his couch and floor for sleeping, so all was well. Astana was as expected a lot colder than Almaty, but here was lesson number three. According to Azim, our Kazakh host, the weather was rather balmy. No, -5 in the wind is not cold according to Kazakh standards, it is temperate. Normal at this time of year would be -20 to -25 and only at -40 to -45 would they consider things nippy. But as Tim and I walked around Capital, we found it chilly nonetheless, no matter what Kazakhs might think. And as we leisurely strolled the wide avenues of Astana, we learned our fourth lesson, which is that 10 percent of the annual budget of the country is spent on Astana, and you can see it! World renowned architects are designing outrageous structures in all forms and colours,
Almaty
Street in Almaty
and I must admit it looks good. Especially what I call 'monumental avenue' simply because I don't know the real name of the strip, is filled with futuristic looking buildings, which somehow blend in together very well. Than again for 10 percent of the budget you would expect something good.
After admiring what money can buy, we pondered what to do next and going further north for a day trip to the frozen wastes of Lake Burabay, nicknamed the Switzerland of Kazakhstan seemed just the right thing to warm our bones. Switzerland it isn't, but it is beautiful and especially in winter, with the white expanse where the lake normally sits, the craggy mountains sprinkled with powder, and the forests weighed down by the snow. Lesson five, Kazakhstan consists of more than steppes!
It was time to leave Azim and Astana by this time and so we went to Pavlodar, which hasn't got much, but Tim knew Dan from Canada was there teaching English and so we would have another warm place to stay. I am not sure why anybody would want to teach English in Pavlodar, either in summer or winter, but Dan seemed to enjoy it.
Almaty
Abay State Opera & Ballet Theatre
Perhaps being a Canadian from the prairies of western Canada has something to do with it. Same climate I would imagine. Pavlodar, what can I say about it? Nothing really. It is a grey Soviet town, which does have a brand new mosque which would do good on the cover of a science fiction book. Which brings me to lesson six, Kazakhstan has some sprawling Soviet style cities and factories up north.
Pavlodar's saving grace was, apart from Dan's hospitality, the fact that I got my palm read by Daniella, a Russian lady/dancer/gypsy. This is the second time in my life that my future has been looked into, the first time being in Cameroon, Africa by a crab. The crab basically did a horrible job at predicting my future, nothing of what the crab indicated would happen (the crab of course didn't do the speaking, the accompanying crab-sorcerer did the interpreting, the crab only picked out certain shards in a pot) has in fact happened. I am not a pilot, married to an African lady and living happily ever after in Africa. Instead I find myself in a Siberian winter in Pavlodar. Than again, trusting a crab to tell
Almaty
St. Nicholas Cathedral
me the future probably never was a smart thing. So what did Daniella see in my hands? Well, it seems I will live a long life in relatively good health (no major issues on that front it would seem), I should reach the hundreds without much trouble. In my late thirties I will meet two women, with who will play an important role in my life. I will meet them at the same time (perhaps a three-some of some sort) and this will cause friction. I create my own luck, but wasn't born with it, this is because I have ignored my guardian angels being the down to earth Dutch guy I am. Tim's future was also looked into, he will as far as we understood have many women, much to his delight, change his destiny to the worse (becoming evil somewhere along the way), have health problems at 60 or 70, but if he overcomes these he will live to an old age as well.
With nothing left to do in Pavlodar and our futures set, Semey seemed like a good option. Semey is known for being close to the area where the Soviets used to test their
Almaty
Me at Almaty train station nuclear bombs, some 400 odd of them were exploded in the vicinity. Because of this there is a large amount of radiation related illnesses, like cancer, deformities and mental health issues among the local population. Here is lesson seven, Kazakhstan might look empty enough for nuclear tests, but nothing is ever empty enough for such ridiculous tests! The proof is visible in the streets of Semey and the surrounding areas.
I kind of liked Semey, it has a lot of small log houses with frilly woodcarvings and all that and some nice Russian churches and Mosques, cancelling out a little of the drab Soviet architecture. Dostoevsky was exiled here for a while, and the one of Kazakhstan most famous poets and writers was born here, so it has some cultural history as well. So here I learned another lesson, number eight, which is that Soviet or not, there is culture and history in many of the towns up north. More importantly however is the English language menu at Hotel Semey, which has such delicacies as: 'The hard is raw' on its breakfast menu. What is this? You might ask, and it would be a good question. One to which
Almaty to Astana
Tim and I on the train from Almaty to Astana I haven't got an answer yet. But you could always also choose 'Porridge is rice' or 'Butter is creamy' and if it takes your fancy maybe try 'A ham is fried'! Yes, the menu at Hotel Semey was its most alluring aspect.
That in full has been my experience of northern Kazakhstan, a vast area of rolling nothingness interspersed with fortune tellers and bizarre menus. It is all I could have ever asked for and more!
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willy
non-member comment
Ralf waar was je
gelukkig iets van je te horen. Er was al een beetje ongerustheid. En dat is niet leuk. Maar je hebt hele leuke dingen gedaan. En goh we kunnen nog bijna 70 jaar van je genieten. Maar hoe ga je dat aanpakken met die vrouwen??? Nou ja tijd genoeg om erover na te denken. Wij filosoferen hier wel over mee hahaha..... Nou op naar je volgende verhaal. De foto's zijn prachtig!! Veel plezier verder Doeiug............................