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Fushimi Inari-taisha
There are 1000s of vermillion torii (Shinto shrine gates) spread all across the mountain in Kyoto.Three star Michelin restaurants in basement subways. Doll-like Japanese girls dressed in tutus, heavy goth makeup and sky-high chunky running shoes. Butter, wasabi and blueberry cheesecake flavoured kit kats. A single crosswalk where 1000s of people walk across at the same time without bumping into each other. One perfect mango priced at 8,000¥ ($80 CAD). Cafes where all the servers dress up as maids. A super high-tech society that doesn’t accept credit cards. Three massive Louis Vuitton stores within blocks of each other.
Weird? Yes. Wacky? Yes… and altogether wonderful. Here are my top things I love about Japan.
1. The Toilets Traveling with two toddlers means that you are constantly on the lookout for a washroom. “Do you need to pee?” is a constant question. Without fail, the response is a vehement, “NO”, only to be followed 5 minutes later by a sprint to the nearest toilet, accompanied by “you HOLD it!!!” Fortunately, in Japan, a toilet is never far. And the best part is that by and large, the washrooms are clean. And I mean impeccably clean, even the ones in the subway!
The infamous Japanese toilet is wonderful.
Mount Fuji
Speeding down to Hiroshima on a Nozomi bullet train, we managed a glimpse of this beautiful mountain. Yes, this may sound weird but the toilets have so many functions. Not only are the seats heated, but press a button and you can play white noise to disguise the business you are about to unleash. Press another button and you can spray water to clean your bum (after pressing other buttons to set the temperature, pressure and direction of the water). Add in a smart phone and this adds up to one happy Sidd. The girls now know that when Dad disappears, it’s because, “he’s on the toilet”. Twenty minutes, minimum. He’s now asking whether we can install one in our house…
2. Sumo Peering down at the dohyo (elevated clay ring), I see two enormous men weighing on average about 400lbs. They wear nothing but a mawashi (loincloth) and sport an oicho (topknot) hairstyle. The girls turn to me and ask, “Mama, mama – why are they nago nago (naked)?” I laugh and ask them whether they want to cheer on the purple or blue sumo wrestler. They choose purple. We sit back and watch the posturing continue. It is quite a long ritual
Natsu Basho
All of the makushita (higher ranked wrestlers). (4 minutes) and includes throwing handfuls of salt onto the ring and smacking one’s fat. Finally, after a signal from the tiny gyoji (referee) in a colourful silk outfit, the sumo wrestlers each put a fist down and give each other one last hairy eyeball. Then… slam! Like two tidal waves, the giants crash into each other in a herculean effort to push the other out of the ring, or onto the ground. Blink and you might miss the winning move as sometimes it is over in mere seconds! In this match, purple wins as blue tumbles off the ring into the spectators sitting on the ground, who madly try to scramble out of the way. The girls cheer. Asha then announces, “I want to sit down there!”
Sumo is just plain wonderful. I was totally hooked after our visit to the Ryogoku Kokugikan (sumo stadium) and watched the highlights of the tournament every evening. I am happy to report that my favourite wrestler, Terunofuji won the basho over much higher ranked Yokozuna (grand champion) Hakuho. I have told Sidd that when we come back to watch sumo, I too want to
Shibuya Crossing
Asha had so much fun watching the people cross in all directions. sit “down there”.
3. Vending Machines Staring at the pictures on the vending machine buttons, I look at Sidd and shrug. He offers no guidance as everything is in Japanese. Plugging in some change, I press random buttons and hope for the best. Out spits three coupons, which I hope represent a bowl of miso ramen with a half order of extra noodles and some gyoza. I present these to the server inside and fortunately I get more or less what I wanted. Noodles are cold and the broth is separate but it’s still darn good!
It’s amazing how the Japanese have come up with ways to make eating more efficient. Vending machines eliminate the need for money inside the restaurant. Eating standing up means you don’t waste time getting up and down. How deliciously wacky.
4. Ramen (but where oh where are the vegetables?) As I was chowing down yet another bowl of deliciously carb-laden noodles, I realized that the only vegetables I had eaten in the last three days were of the weird pickled kind. Always salty, quite pungent and mostly unidentifiable, I wasn’t sure if this fit the bill of 8-10 servings
per day. However, despite this lack of vegetables, overweight Japanese are few and far between! They must all have super high metabolism, or maybe the secret is a diet of refined carbs with a side of fatty pork. Regardless, as we don’t share this gene, we have taken to bringing a plastic bag of cut vegetables with us everywhere. By the time we get back from Japan, we will be orange from all the carrots!
5. Ingrained Manners (Is that my child screaming? Oh yes, wait, of course it is.) “Nooooooo!!!!! I want to press the button!” (Asha)
(Keira) “Iiiiiiiiiii PRESS button!!!!!!!”
(Sidd) “No more arguing, or everyone gets a time out!”
Japanese people are very polite. Everyone bows to express respect and no one pushes or shoves. It was highly amusing watching people board the plane as instead of the usual mobbing of the gate, the airline staff had to call twice before the Japanese formed orderly lines. This politeness extends even to Japanese children. These model girls and boys sit calmly in quiet restaurants and eat without prompting. By contrast, our kids, whom I have always thought
Itsukushima Shrine
This is located off the island of Miyajima, which is a short ferry from Hiroshima. At low tide, it is completely exposed and you walk around the base. were quite well behaved, seem like little terrors. I saw only one other child that was screaming his head off. I was about to take some comfort in the fact that Japanese children also have their meltdowns. Then I heard the mom speak English… another tourist! I need to learn what these Japanese moms do to keep their kids so wonderfully well behaved!
6. To recycle, or to burn While clean toilets are abundant in Japan, garbage cans are a very rare sight, despite hefty fines for littering. After days of carrying around the obligatory garbage bag, Sidd figured it out. Although Japanese are all about efficiency, they do not eat and walk, or drink and walk. Accordingly, there is no need for garbage cans on the street - Japanese don’t have anything to throw out while walking around!
Another weird fact about garbage is that Japanese recycle only glass and plastic bottles. Everything else falls into the category, “combustible”. Apparently the carbon emissions produced from burning the trash are less than what would be produced from recycling! Go figure. I’m still always surprised, however, that paper is not recycled as everything here is so beautifully packaged.
Sushi Breakfast
Lovely luscious uni and explosive salmon roe = delicious way to start the day. Buy one pair of socks and it is put into a paper bag, closed with a shiny sticker, then placed into a pretty carrier bag. If it’s raining, then you can also opt for a clear plastic bag to put on top. Only three layers of wrapping to burn!
7. Sushi for Breakfast and Takoyaki “Saaaalllmon suuuuushiiii! I want more salmon sushi!”
I watch with amusement as Asha stuffs yet another piece of salmon in her mouth, after carefully inspecting it for wasabi (check, none) and peeling off the rice (unnecessary carbs – they interfere with the taste). Keira, meanwhile, has moved on to her miso soup, and is shoveling in slimy green kelp, of course after picking off any green onion (only certain green things make the cut). Wacky kids. They reject sandwiches, but will gorge on raw fish and their favourite, octopus.
Octopus anything really – Keira’s favourite is takoyaki (doughy octopus balls) and the Japanese in Osaka are just plain crazy about this dish. In Dontomburi Arcade, there were no less than 10 takoyaki shops in one block! Asha, however, prefers just plain grilled octopus tentacles, the
more suction-cups the better. The girls absolutely loved the famous Tsukiji Market, where they auction off massive blue-fin tuna bound for all parts of the world each morning. After gorging on beautiful bowls of chirashi sushi for breakfast (and discovering a new favourite, “bubbles” aka salmon roe), the girls thoroughly enjoyed traipsing through the aisles lined with crates of assorted weird sea creatures and pointing out every octopus they could spot. As Asha would say, “I eat it allllll!”
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Arvind Thakore
non-member comment
RE The weird nad wonderful
A great write up Melissa. You should be an author. I felt like I was in Japan. Thanks.