ferry boats = federal punishment...could their be a new solution???

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...so i have managed to seduce a good looking boy and have stolen his computer. it may sound ridiculous and far fetched but i assure you its true. we all know that capitalization and punctuation are for well educated bloggers...and as an underpaid, overworked snowboard instructor we know that educated is something i am not. as we were...

back at the ferry "terminal" in Lembar, Lombok...Tristan and I were starting to feel quite at home in our new found Indonesian province of choice. even though the taste of banana pancake lingered from an early breakfast, we found ourselves starving waiting the 2 hours for the twelve o'clock ferry back to Padangbai. its funny, in Lombok i don't remember eating with utensils. the locals just eat with their hands, and of course their is a finger dish near by to rinse off your rice-caked sticky fingers. so as we waited, i was compelled to go in search of a second breakfast. i really did out do myself when i scored the motherload of rice, chicken, tempe and other assorted finger foods, i even hads to finish Tryst's for her. All for something like 10 000 rupiah each...the equivalence of a dollar. as i ate my bargain of a meal i felt pretty proud of my acquired skills. i had tracked down, ordered and properly consumed an indonesian feast...and for a moment i think i felt like a dirty backpacker..i mean, we had always been really dirty, and had always been backpacking..but i mean the true essence of the word "backpacker" realy felt like it had come into play. two fellow canadians rocked up not long after we has started into our lunch and immediately were curious as to where we scored our huge feed, all rolled in bamboo leaves and brown paper. they came back with something similar but seemed proud when they proclaimed, " oh but we asked for spoons, we saw you eating with your fingers...". what a bunch of douchebags...,"thanks retard, i know they have spoons but i was having a moment and was rather enjoying shoveling my ice into my mouth with my digits". ok i didn't actually say that, i just smirked and then we made fun of them later...bahahaha! they were from edmonton, you can't expect much from oiler's fans anyways!

to describe an indonesian ferry terminal...of any kind...involves some intense visualization. so for anyone interested, i want you to picture the Bronx, and the concession that would be located at a carnival held there. only this concession serves rice, fried chicken, and tofu. this concession has been operating for 30 years non stop and has no sort of garbage system, and instead of rides at this carnival, they offer 9 hour ferry boat rides or decrepid pony cart rides, all for a low cost. now lets add in the concession vendors who can't afford a stall. these vendors, they buy a giant basket, fill it with snacks for all at double the price, throw a towel on their head and harrass you until you buy something. oh right..some have fruit and carry machetes. now their is a ticket office, but getting there isn't for the faint of heart, if you can push your way through the crowds of illicit ticket sellers and porters who don't ask but simply grab and carry your bags and then auction them back to you for an exorbitant amount of money then you are permitted to purchase your ticket and board the boat...but not before you buy fruit and overpriced beer from a street vendor. sounds exciting...doesn't it. well if the 40 degrees and the 100% humidity outside didn't kill you while you ran the gauntlet to get onto the boat with your backpack, surfboard and other perephenilia (who knows how to spell that word?) that you clearly needed to buy...well its definetly going to get you once you have packed your overheated, over bargained ass inside that damn boat with 200 indonesians and the 30 westerners who thought that taking the ferry instead of flying would be a cultural experience. don't worry, its been entertaining up until this point...because now you sit....for 9 hours...you sit. or maybe your tired, so you sleep...on the ferry boat floor?? maybe with your damp, smelly sarong that you bought on day 2 of your trip, the one that you used as a towel a week ago and it never dried. why not lay it out and catch up on your sleep..oh i dunno...for the next 9 hours. or better yet, why don't you delve into that book you have always wanted to read...i'll tell you why not! because their are babies crying and people snoring and you have sweat pouring down your face and the indonesian TV program playing at the front of the boat is obscenely loud and you can barely hear yourself think let alone try and follow the plot of a book.
good thing we're all busy soaking in the culture....
well the people who could have afforded to fly....they felt stupid....
for tryst and i, and the other 10 who had to be there...we all shared in a "backpacker" moment. and although i cringe at the thought. i'd do it again...maybe for a documentary on why we should all get an education...and earn the little extra to be able to fly...not that a flight with Garuda Indonesia Airlines would be any safer..but you know...it too could be a cultural experience...

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