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Published: November 3rd 2014
So arrive in Delhi at 11:30pm due to the train from Agra being 5 fucking hours late! At this point I'm dreading having to spend a night on the streets because the guest houses might be closed, luckily I met a Brazilian girl on the train and just went to where she was staying, decent room, clean, my own shower and toilet 300rs, the shower doesn't work however and the guy refuses to lower the price to that of a room with no shower...no matter, I don't think they've realised you get wifi in this room!
Flicking through the guide book for Delhi, and there's just the usual bollocks to go and do, more looking at old shit. Not interested at this point, I've seen enough old shit that more or less all looks the same, I'll give it a miss for a few days. Initially I intended to spend only 2 nights in Delhi, but after my horror train from Varanasi I'm feeling a few days of doing fuck all coming on!
I go down to the touristy places one day to have a look around, assuming maybe you can take a picture from the outside and see the general architecture, you can't, a waste of a journey, although I nip past the JLN stadium and find out the Delhi dynamos FC are playing, 200rs a ticket, I'd rather be watching the old shit that is Allessandro Del Piero than the usual temples and tombs!
Some alright players between the two teams (Delhi vs Chennai), Del Piero, djemba-djemba, Bernard mendy, elano, silvestre and a few others not really worth noting. The game was alright, there was a part when watching a section of the crowd trying to start a Mexican wave was more interesting, but there you go! The standard is like maybe league 1/2, some of the Indian players are fucking shite, I reckon I'm genuinely as bad as one of them! But you get what you pay for and it was definitely worth doing instead of another temple/tomb!
I go down to look at the lotus temple, that's been likened to the Sydney opera house, I get there and the fucking queue is like a mile long! Fuck that! I'll have a look from a distance thanks.
The metro in Delhi is really efficient and clean, apart from the unnerving stares from a lot of Indians, who still continue to stare even after you make eye contact and smile etc... I'm beginning to notice Indians don't have inhibitions when it comes to staring at you, or standing so close you in a queue they're touching your arse...
I heard something years ago that British people are the best in the world at queuing, I didn't really understand what that meant at the time, but now I know. We stand at an appropriate fucking distance from the person in front so as not to invade their personal space, but not so far away we don't look like we're not part of the queue.
The night i arrived in Delhi it was the first day of Diwali. Now, Diwali was pretty mental in a rural village last year, but Delhi was something else! Huge fireworks being let off all night, all over the streets, it sounds like a war zone! I'm walking down the street and there's literally bangs going off on both sides of the street, I'm constantly shitting myself, for some reason I'm not expecting a fucking banger to go off mere feet away from me every few steps!
On the last day I went to the parliament area of the city, built by the British, everything looks very British, as you'd imagine. There's so many Indians here asking me and my kiwi mate for photos! It's a fucking joke! Like every few feet! "One photo please" fuck off! Go and bother some other white people!
We pose for the pictures and move on, they don't speak enough English to tell us why they're taking the pictures, so we just assume it's 'cos we're white....either that of they've got some website they upload the pictures onto and take the piss! But whatever.
Delhi's a pretty western city, didn't really get up to too much, just chilled out and walked around!
Off to Udaipur, apparently the most romantic city in India.
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