Army High on Heroin


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Asia » Hong Kong » Hong Kong Island
September 15th 2016
Published: June 14th 2017
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They've taken the typhoon warning signs out of the hotel lobby, so thankfully it seems that the monster storm has gone elsewhere.

We again catch the Star Ferry across to Hong Kong island, and board a Hop on Hop off Bus for a tour around the island. We pass a building bearing a striking resemblance to an upside gin bottle which we're told is the Hong Kong headquarters of the Chinese People's Revolutionary Army. The commentary goes onto say that the soldiers who are stationed there aren't allowed to leave the building, even on their days off. I wonder why they bother bringing them here if they're not allowed to go anywhere. I wonder if they'd be allowed out if there was a war.

We pass Happy Valley racecourse, and continue on through the two kilometre long Aberdeen Tunnel to the other side of the island. We pass the massive Ocean Park theme park which is in two sections connected by a cable car. We continue along the coast to Repulse Bay. Pirates were apparently a huge problem right along the South China Sea coast in colonial times, and Repulse Bay was a particularly popular pirate hangout. It's so named because it was the last place in Hong Kong from which pirates were eventually "repulsed", after a very concerted effort by the British. The commentary tells us that this side of the island has now become prime real estate due to its beaches, sea views and relaxed lifestyle, all within half an hour of Hong Kong city. The bay is fringed with very fancy looking high rise apartment blocks, which we're told are typically valued at around twenty thousand Hong Kong dollars per square foot. I get my calculator out. I think this works out at about three million Australian dollars for an apartment about twice the size of our hotel room, so I think we can confidently cross Repulse Bay off our list of possible places to retire to.

We get off at the very pretty waterfront village of Stanley, which is apparently well known for its market. We wander along the waterfront, and then up into the market, which is centred around a single very narrow alleyway off the waterfront. It's so narrow that we nearly don't see it.

A convincing spruiker lures us into a waterfront cafe for lunch, where I'm told that I can get a free beer with my meal. Issy orders the beer, and I order a lemonade. The waitress starts laughing, and then says "interesting". She's not too sure about the expressions on our faces, and starts to look a bit embarrassed. I think she suspects that she may have just offended my manhood. She backtracks by saying "only kidding". I take my cue. I tell her that my wife is a very keen beer drinker, and always has several for lunch. I add that I'm a tee totaller. As she leaves I see that Issy has turned a dark shade of purple. She says that she'll kill me later. The waitress doesn't wait too long before coming back to find out when Issy would like her next beer, and I suspect my troubles may just have got a lot worse.

Back on the bus the commentary gives us some of Hong Kong's history. It seems that in the early 1800s Britain imported huge amounts of tea from China. There was however virtually no demand for western goods in the orient, so to correct this trade imbalance British merchants started exporting opium to China. The Chinese weren't too happy about the growing numbers of opium addicts among their population, so the emperor demanded that the trade stop. This led to the Opium Wars, which Britain won. One of the conditions of the peace treaty, the Treaty of Nanking, was that Hong Kong be handed over to the British. It seems to me that the Chinese were very much on the raw end of this deal. The colonialists apparently managed to convince themselves that it was quite reasonable to turn half the Chinese population into heroin addicts, and similarly unreasonable for the Chinese to want this stopped. No wonder the British won the war. Most of the Chinese army was probably high on heroin. I'm glad the colonial days are over.

We get off the bus at Aberdeen where our tickets entitle us to a free ride on a sampan. The lady on the dock looks like she's in her sixties, and she's not to be messed with. A few of the passengers try to get on without the right tickets and are quickly given their marching orders. The craft's driver looks like she's about eighty five, and we suspect she might be sampan dock lady's mother. She doesn't seem to speak any English except for the word "photo". We pull up next to a massive floating seafood restaurant, which I'm sure was here 50 years ago when I came as a nine year old. Our skipper yells "photo", and everyone then rushes to the same side of the boat. We're now in real danger of capsizing. She senses the danger and waves her arms and yells in Chinese for everyone to move back. I don't think anyone on board other than her understands the local language, but this doesn't seem to matter. Her message has been conveyed with great effectiveness and balance is quickly restored. We continue on to another section of the harbour jam packed with every conceivable type and size of seafaring craft including yet more sampans, fishing trawlers and large expensive looking cabin cruisers.

We make our way back to the hotel. It's been raining on and off for a while now, so we decide to eat in. It seems that the hotel buffet costs roughly a hundred and ten Australian dollars per head, plus drinks. As far as we know we haven't just won the lottery so we decide to pass on this and head out into the rain. The hotel forecourt is packed with expertly valet-parked luxury limousines, presumably owned by locals for whom a hundred and ten Australian dollars plus drinks is just small change.

Most of the nearby restaurants look like Asian versions of McDonalds. We pass one called "Outback" which claims to serve Australian dishes including one called "Kookaburra Wings". We pass on this and set up camp in the German restaurant next door. It seems that Issy's taken a sudden liking to sausage. She orders some for entree and then follows up with more for main course. I can't quite believe that we're spending our last night in Hong Kong eating German food. The waiter tells us that today is the Chinese mid Autumn Festival when families get together to celebrate a full harvest. Traditional activities include gazing at the full moon. It's been cloudy and wet most of the day, so I hope they're not going to disappointed.

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