Hot Time, Summer in the City/A Chinese Wedding

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As you may have gathered from my last blog entry, it's really hot and humid in the summer in Jinan. My days are spent in front of a fan and/or air-conditioning, watching DVDs of Scrubs and Lost and Friends. I have taken on some extra hours with Aston Summer Intensive classes, so I work Mon-Wed-Fri afternoons in addition to my Friday-Saturday-Sunday routine. I like it, it gets me out of the house, and I get some extra spending money. The kids are great, and I see them so often, the classes fly by! It's like when I was at Cornell College and had one class at a time. Every few weeks I'd finish a class, and these kids will be done with their classes in 6 weeks - wow! Some of the kids are already Aston weekend students and are repeating their current level; others are advancing to the next level and speeding through it.

I have been enjoying hanging out with the other teachers, frequenting the local bars for dance outings, birthday parties for friends, and swimming in the pond behind the other teachers' apartment building. It's a natural spring that was unearthed when that area was a rock quarry. Yep, I'm swimming at the quarry. It sounds like something out of the 1950's when I put it like that! It's nice to cool off from the summer sweatiness. My friend Carmel brings her dog, Mouse, down with us, and Mouse is afraid of the water but gets her paws wet a little, which I'm sure cools her off. The swimming hole is mostly populated by Jinan men, and they all seem to prefer swimming in their boxers or briefs to having actual swimming trunks. I don't get it, it's just one of those Chinese things. The women's swimsuits are something out of the 1950s or 1960s, suits that cover you up entirely and have bottoms that are like frilly shorts - very conservative. There are rarely women at the pond, just us female Aston teachers. Some of the Aston teachers think it's gross or dirty to swim there, but I think it's just fine. Anything to cool off! My friend Jen swims there every day, doing laps. I wonder what the Chinese think about us being the brave - or crazy - foreigners out for an afternoon swim in our bikinis.

On Sunday, July 22nd, I was lucky enough to attend my friend Jie's wedding. I met Jie through Kathryn, the Scottish woman who lived in my apartment last semester. Jie is a Jinan native who went to law school in Durham, England. She now works as an attorney here in Jinan, using her English and Chinese language skills. She is a truly kind person, a great friend to have. I don't see her too often, but she came to my birthday party and we occasionally bump into each other on my street, as she works at the end of Foshan Jie. Anyway, a week before her wedding, she called to invite me! How cool and yet how strange. In the US, we get formal wedding invitations in the mail a month or two ahead of time, and have to RSVP by a certain date. I don't know if I was a last-minute addition or if invitations are always so last-minute, but I was in! In China, traditions around weddings are quite different. There is usually a short engagement, sans ring, and then the couple will get married shortly thereafter. They basically decide they will get married and then go out and do it. None of this long engagement and fancy proposal business, just get to the married life already!

Jie and Tom were getting married on a Sunday morning at 11:00 AM, which is a time when I usually am working, of course. Thankfully, I was able to wrangle out of my Sunday morning class early, and skipped lunch and promised to be back in time for my 1:00 PM class. I quickly changed into a dress and dashed off in a taxi to the wedding hall. There was quite a bit of traffic, so I was nervous about being late to my first Chinese wedding. No problem, I got there just in time. There was a check-in table outside the wedding room, and I wasn't sure if I had to check in or what, but I was ushered through and saw Jie and Tom in the hallway. I said hello - Tom looked handsome and Jie was so beautiful in her gown! - and then I entered the wedding hall. My co-worker Christopher was already there, so I sent him a text message to find him in the crowd. He informed me that the tradition in China is for guests to register when they arrive and say how much money they are giving to the couple. So the people in the hallway are basically tallying up the guests' contributions. Hmmm.... I didn't contribute money, I hope that's not a faux pas! It's a good thing that Christopher was there to inform me of the proceedings and what people were saying, as I didn't know what was going on.

A Chinese wedding is like a wedding and reception and toasts all at once. There is no church, just the reception hall. There is an emcee, giving you a play-by-play of the proceedings. There is a spotlight on the couple as they enter, and they make their way to the front of the room with spotlights glaring and music blaring and the emcee shouting. The emcee and family members and others give speeches about the happy couple. The couple pledges their love to each other and thank the guests for coming. The ceremony concludes with the lighting of candles and the lighting of fireworks (small-scale of course, we were indoors after all!). Finally, as the bride and groom exit, the bride stops to toss her bouquet. The lucky bouquet-catcher is then interviewed on the mic by the emcee about I don't know what. Next stop, lunch.

I knew I had to leave before the food was served, so just munched on the snacks already laid on the table. There were cigarettes next to the snacks, as all men in China smoke and it's a sign of hospitality to provide/offer cigarettes to your friends/guests. Christopher and I sat at a table with friends of Jie and Tom whom I had previously met. I hadn't seen them since I had first met them when I first came to Jinan and was hanging out with Kathryn that first week or two. Nonetheless, we said our hellos and exchanged pleasantries. After a short while, Christopher and I excused ourselves to get back to work. I got back just in time for my 1:00 PM class. I was so glad that I could make it to the big wedding!

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