It's been so long.

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It's almost 3 am... I can't sleep, it's the first day of the Year of the Snake, but I woke up late and spent the day alone with Joonie. I've had a lot on my mind these days, just thinking of what I should be doing and how I really need to get my life in order, find a decent job, etc.

My awesome New Year's feast, are you ready for this? I had oatmeal for breakfast, and baked potatoes with sliced onion and olive oil for dinner, since yours truly had to devour the butter before Spring Festival. One cup of Ovaltine (which I never touched for the first two decades of my life... and suddenly in China I'm thinking... can I make Ovaltine cookies?). I do feel kind of lonely and *cough* abandoned *cough* but I think those are my own issues. Thanks to PPTV, I downloaded a decade's worth of SVU on my iPad to entertain me at night.

Midnight webcam. I'm thinking... hm. Yinghong told me that when you marry a Chinese guy, you're not only marrying the guy, but also his family. And already your family is suspish of me even though they haven't met me. I can confidently predict that things have great potential to go downhill. If they already have 'yi jian' towards me JUST for not being Chinese, then I can totally see everything I say or do being interpreted the wrong way just because I'm not the perfect potential daughter-in-law that your ex was.

I actually respect your ex, I really do. I can promise you that I'll never be the DIL that she could have been, hand-washing all your family's laundry, babysitting for eight kids, calling your parents every now and then to check up on them. I have no insecurity over this, nor do I feel threatened that you'll go back to her. But I don't want to be disliked by your family for not being her.

So, webcam, I actually don't like webcam, but I don't mind it with you. You smile and it makes me smile and we're all smiley not talking about how your parents already don't like me.

You say you'll see me 'chu 8' or so. I don't know how much or what to believe.

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