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Published: July 13th 2007
William, one of our students, has an image of himself as a master businessman. About two months ago, he decided to set up a school, in the town his girlfriend's father lives. He offered us places as teachers, 10,000 kuai each a month, for two months. Apartment, flights paid for, the works. Wow, says us. This sounds like a fantastic plan. Making loads of bucks, seeing a different part of China, good hiking down there, and we'd have enough money to afford stuff when back in England for a week or so, rather than having to beg poverty and drink other people's dregs.
Many meetings happened, to talk about nothing. William would call at 7.30am about something urgent, only for us to find out that it was because he wanted us to teach phrases in our classes, rather than the rubbish we churn out at the moment. My jaw started to ache just at the thought of the boy, as my teeth gritted at the image of his smug little grin. The pay started to get less, as he only had 12 students, the apartment went to a hostel, then a hotel, then a motel. When we gently voiced our disappointment (see me using my teacher voice on him quite loudly), he just grinned and changed the subject. However, even though it was now less money for three weeks work, we still decided to go. It'd be nice to see some of the south, maybe go hiking at weekends, see Wuhan...all that jazz.
The night before we were due to fly, we got a text from William, saying we needed to be at the airport 3 hours before the flight, because of Artemis. Ummm. No. We got there an hour and a half before, to see him and his girlfriend perched on top of their bags still, with their little dog in tow. We finally checked in about 45 minutes before.
Eventless flight. Got to Wuhan, then had to run around the city, with Artemis, her box, our two heavy rucksacks, and two useless Chinese students. I wasn't really paying attention, and was really miffed when I found out the stress and hassle was so we could eat. I wondered aloud why we couldn't just wait until we got to out final destination, but was ignored, because I'm a foreigner and don't know about things like that. A rather rubbish meal later (what do you expect from a train station restaurant?), and it was all panic again. There were no bus tickets to YueYang available from this station, only from the other one on the other side of town. Running, sweating, hurdling, coping with more shouts of 'foreign devil' than I have ever encountered, and we had missed the bus by 30 seconds. Another hour and a half until the next one. The girlfriend, JoJo, then got in a strop with William. He should have booked tickets beforehand, but it wasn't really his fault it was so busy. However. he is useless with her, and instead of apologising and leaving it, he shouted back at her that she was spoiled, and it was all fun and games from there. Joe and I ended up carting their wheeliebags along behind us, despite the fact we were already loaded with our own stuff, but they are both used to people just picking up after them, so didn't think that maybe they needed to pick their bags up. They did buy us some awful cheap ice-cream to make up for it, which I had to accidentally drop on the floor.
Four hours of delicious bus later, and we were finally in YueYang. Cool city, there's a nice cinema, good shops, decent-looking restaurants and...hey. Where are we going? What's that barrier for? Oh. Not staying in YueYang, but the Sinopec factory suburb of it. How fun. I love oil company compounds. William had told us not to worry about staying in a hotel, when I asked about eating and laundry, he said there were lots of places to eat right outside. What if I'm hungry at 2am? No problem. Apparently. We got there about 9pm, and everything was shutting down, and didn't look appetising at all. I just wanted to crash, William asked if we wanted to eat. We said no, just a shower then rest. It's your choice, says he. Dumped the bags, got a call from William saying he was waiting downstairs, there was a reservation for us.
Went out for dinner with JoJo's parents and two of their friends, one of which is the head of police. Nice guanxi! But it's going to make it hard to make a getaway if we need to. The two men bought a case of beer, and started doing the cheers-chug thing. I had finished two bottles, Joe was on his third, and they hadn't finished one between them. Rather than losing face to two laowai, they mumbled drunkenly that we must be very tired and it wasn't fair for them to keep us up. How kind of them.
After a dismal night's sleep, due to the fact the room is next to the part of the traintrack that demands you use your airhorn if you are a train driver, William phoned several times about nothing. He finally said that he is waiting downstairs, so I then got in the shower. He wanted to know our teaching plans. Though we still didn't know who we were teaching. He also said that it had been decided it was too dangerous for foreigners to live outside, so we would have to stay in the mangy hotel for the next three weeks. I said that it was very expensive here, he said it would be cheap to eat but...? He smugly smiled at me and said yes, wasn't it expensive, he didn't know that before. I asked about laundry. He said the sink is there. I said no, there's no way Joe's jeans would fit, and nowhere to dry or iron. He walked into the bathroom, found one hanger and handed it to me. Here you go, now no problem. Joe leapt in front of me. I have never had the urge to punch someone so much in my whole life. The smile compounds it, smug-grinned git. William and JoJo took us out for more over-priced, not very delicious food. After a while, William said he had told us a white lie.
The Beijing police had called. Apparently, we are only allowed to work for the university that gives us our visa. Why were we not told this before? William said it was OK, because of the head of police friend, he had said he knew nothing about us. So, says he, we say we have a little holiday. We tried to explain to William that this was dodgy, we could go to jail, at least be deported, and we couldn't continue. No problem, he had arranged it all. Things got tense and shouty, until we finally realised that he had just made a mistake in talking, he WAS going to stop the school, and would treat us to a mini-holiday because he felt so bad. As Joe and I had been talking about maybe drinking tap water so as to give us an opportunity to get the hell out, it was lucky there was a misunderstanding, as we could disguise our joy at not having to stay there as joy at being worried about the police. I was so happy, even the miserable motel didn't seem so terrible, fine for a few days.
We went to JoJo's parents house for the evening, where the dad plonked four cans of beer each in front of me and Joe, but none for the others. Our reputation well and truly fixed here now! Some friends came over to look at the laowai, but they were all really sweet, talked to us in Chinese, despite William's protestations that we don't speak it. He refuses to believe we are capable of picking up even an iota of Chinese in 18 months. But he has the same attitude about teaching, believes he has better ideas than us, though he has never been in a teaching situation ever. It was fun, until the dad took JoJo aside, and said that William would be staying in the hotel, rather than in her room. Understandable, he doesn't like William anyway, and also doesn't want his baby girl sharing a bed under his roof! To prove that she was mature enough to have a proper boyfriend, she shouted about how unfair it was, stamped her foot, burst into tears, then ran into her room and slammed the door. We left, with William in tow, explaining to him that he shouldn't argue with the dad. We leave tomorrow for ChangSha.
No photos, I was too miserable and annoyed to take the camera out! I wanted no momento of these days.
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Emma
non-member comment
Oh My God
Pleaaase come to my wedding in one piece and not escorted by Chinese policemen!! Be safe love.