Karst Peaks, Communist Dogs & A Sore Arse

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Tiny is an 18 month year old Rough Collie and the most over anxious dog I have ever seen. Understandable that given when he was a puppy he broke both of his front legs...

Tiny is also a Communist.

I know this because when returning to the hostel reception wearing my newly purchased "fine quality" China Red Star Communist T-shirt from the market, the friendly but bonkers girl behind the desk, who appeared to have learnt all her English from cartoon characters such was her child like excitable disposition, exclaimed "MATT, why you dress like a dog... TINY have also this fine T-shirt!"

And so, as you can see, I now share a bond now with this lefty dog although I am hoping that Tiny merely leans towards Socialism rather than being a crazy, genocidal Stalinist. I cannot say that when I departed Guilin on a Bamboo Boat for Yangshuo I had expected to meet any left wing canines...

The River Li, leading through beautiful kast peaks is far removed from the concrete metropolis of Beijing and the pollution in Xi'an, and has some of the most breathtaking scenery I have ever seen... The water levels in the river are quite low in November so we could not complete the entire stretch between the two towns, instead getting a short bus ride to get the bamboo boat, but we were lucky that the most scenic part of the river was not ruled out and we spent a good few hours making our way down the river, taking photos and sitting off at the front of the boat, enjoying the spectacular sites.

Even the sexy French girls’ chain smoking all the way down the river could not distract me from this amazing cruise down the river... Well, not much.

Yangshuo itself is rather tacky and very much geared towards tourists but cycle for 15 minutes or walk for half an hour in any direction away from the hub and the countryside really opens up. The surrounding areas really are stunning...

The way to take in these surroundings in this part of the world is on bike. Brilliant. Easy. Of course. Everyone can ride a bike.

Well, yes, I guess, but as I pay my 10 yuan over to hire a Mountain Bike it occurs to me that the last time I drove something on two wheels was ten years ago on a moped (gay wicker basket included) in Ayia Napa (God, forgive me) and that ended up being stolen and abandoned in a swimming pool down the road...

Setting off, somewhat wobbly, I tentatively cycled up to a quiet village, avoiding the proper roads... After working out how to change gear and stop I decided to try the roads but stuck to cycling with flocks of small school children, hoping they would offer some kind of cover... However, after 20 minutes I convinced myself that I was a Street Hawke, recklessly speeding between trucks, cars and rickshaws, spending hours happily zooming around the countryside to my hearts content...

And, due to the standard of the roads, to my arses discomfort!

Still, I managed to see Moon Hill, a hill with a natural arch through it which is very impressive although most enjoyment came from getting a bit lost, including cycling into a somewhat bewildered Chinese families farmyard by mistake!

And so, after spending a good four days in Yangshuo, Hong Kong beckons and I book myself into the apty names Sleeper Bus to Shenzhen. A mere ten hour journey ahead of us, the Chinese people on the bus burst into laughter as I board the bus...

This should be funny. A lanky Englishman, over 6 foot, attempting to get into a Sleeper that looks like it was designed for an Umpa-Lumpa...

With little leg room, a driver who deemed it necessary to beep his horn every five minutes in case anyone had actually managed to fall asleep, and a girl opposite me snoring like a gattling gun on Omaha Beach, a looooooooong night ensues...

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