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Published: November 25th 2017
The Things Mom fits into Care Packages..
Thanksgiving Décor made our lake day Turkey feel like the Real Deal!In a few hours, the bundled little batches of children will be scurrying to see the Snoopy Floats, the boys will be sent outside to fry the turkey, and my mom and sisters will be hugging, pouring, flouring, and shoving casserole dishes into the oven like little squirrels storing their nuts for the winter. It’s just what we do. They’ll probably pour a glass of wine after a couple cups of coffee, or crack open a craft beer. The girls will be so occupied hosting, they’ll forget their glass and will have only finished one by the time my brothers are on number three. Typical, or, eh.. stereotypical. But I love it.
It’s Thanksgiving, 2017. At 6am my alarm went off, reminding me that I’ll need to light the charcoals for coffee this morning. My gas ran out yesterday, and there hasn’t been electricity in the village for several days. No real complaints though, I’m fortunate to have an outlet most of the time.
I hear the goats. They’ve been waking up before sunrise ever since I returned from Dar es Salaam. Trying to break them back into a later schedule takes weeks of patiently
enduring endless goat calls. I roll out of bed, dump the bucket I use as a potty in the middle of the night, since I’ve been a little nervous to use my outdoor bathroom after the last break-in. Then I go outside, and spend about a half hour lighting matches, fanning coals, and embracing my hard-earned skill- the deep squat.
At 6:45am I grab my empty gas canister and run to catch the passing bus, hoping the conductor won’t mind changing my gas in town so I can avoid hauling it there myself. I wait with the women wrapped in brightly colored fabric. Like Christmas, this is just another day. Rainy season means lots of planting, lots of water, but very little food or money, while dry season means lots of harvesting, more food, and very little water. Everything, even the celebration of Christmas, relies on the schedule of the rains.
When I get back, my water hasn’t even begun to boil. With a little patience, I finally pour myself a cup of Pumpkin Spice coffee my amazing family has sent me. On mornings like this, the smell of Thanksgiving at home brings tears
to my eyes, and I take a moment to reflect on how grateful I am. We hear the words “gratitude” and “blessed” every day, but it takes me hours in deep thought to really understand what they mean.
Grateful. Now, I’m starting to get it. Yes, I’m grateful for the things I have, for sunny days, for my vast fortune and privilege in life, but there’s something deeper when I really practice gratitude. It’s the something that connects us to our tribe. The something that says, “you are literally keeping me emotionally alive.” Or “If I didn’t have you all this time, I would not have accomplished half as much as I have.” It’s the something that says, “you could never understand how I feel when I walk into a room filled with you all on Thanksgiving Day,” but also the something that says, “Understand? Actually, we’re the only people that ever will.”
Today, it can’t be about the turkey, or the sweet potatoes (maybe soon!), or the red wine and leather boots. No, today can’t be about any of those things, because those things don’t transcend oceans or travel time and space. What’s
left, when you strip away those wonderful things and look at the raw existence in which we live? What’s left is real gratitude, and really, that’s just a synonym for love.
Wishing you all the most sincerely joyful Thanksgiving with your Tribe, whoever they may be. Enjoy their presence enough for all of us who are missing our own.
With so much love,
Kate
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GrandMary
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Gratitude
When you feel grateful, you become very good, and then you attract very good things. Plato To live gratitude is to touch heaven. Sending love ? GM