Camels, sand in vajayjays and maybe something a about pandas (and oh yeah; i saw a big stone)


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December 9th 2008
Published: December 9th 2008
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CamelCamelCamel

Seriously; look at him! It's like Goofy's bro or something!

I don't like camels! But I really can't stand pandas



Seriously those camels just look plain silly, silly indeed! First of all; how can you expect to be treated with any sort of respect with those lips? It’s like two big flapping, ridiculous lumps. Then there’s the eyes; bloody big, ugly and completely stoned eyes - but they are not even stoned, that would be some sort of excuse. I mean koalas appear to be stupid little animals, BUT they only eat a type of leaves that get’s them sort of high, and when they are not getting drugged up on those leaves, they sleep. That is cool, and therefore I don’t hate koalas - fact!

We’ve only covered the head of those goofy bastards, and the head itself would be reason enough for not taken these humped weirdoes serious. But there’s more, ohh there’s more. What is it with that hump? (Some of ‘em even got two you know?) What is wrong with growing a big fat belly like the rest of us? Huh? HUH?

Anyway, I could carry on pointing out more completely outrageously silly features about the camels, but I don’t think I have to.
Stupid is runningStupid is runningStupid is running

Words are not enough...
By now you are properly getting the picture - they look stupid! But then when you spot a couple of them standing there at the side of the road, pull over and try to take a picture, just so that you can show your friends how stupid evolution can be.
Listen I found this on Wikipedia right?

“A fully grown adult camel stands 1.85 m (6 ft 1 in) at the shoulder and 2.15 m (7 ft 1 in) at the hump. The hump rises about thirty inches (75 cm) out of its body. Camels can run up to 65 km/h (40 mph) in short bursts and sustain speeds of up to 40 km/h (25 mph).”

Why do you run off when I get out of a car armed with a bloody camera you dumb freak? I mean; I’m not the biggest guy on the planet and you are not a bloody mouse, you tit! But then, IF he could just run in a normal manner, I guess that would be okay, I don’t expect camels to know the difference between a heavy machine gun and a Nikon Coolpix - that would be too much to ask of a goy looking like that. But the way they run, seriously dude, that is lame! They look goofy as hell!

At this point I was really fed up with camels and had started looking for some kind of device I could use for putting them out of their silliness. But then we had dinner, and things started to make sense; they taste awesome! And that gives them a purpose in life: Eat, grow big, get blown away with a big gun (which again gives them a more reason to exist because that would be fun too) and get slaughtered, minced, and prepared with beans, chilli and other good stuff that normaly would go in a chilli con carne. And viola, there you have it - a nice meal of chilli con camel!

That is the reason I hate pandas so much; I mean they are whining all the time about becoming extinct, and what do they do about? Nothing! They sit on their fat black and white asses and eat bamboo. For crying out loud! You’ve got claws and big teeth, and the whole “I’m just gonna look cute”-strategy hasn’t really paid off, has it now? Trying to protect these pathetic fat bamboo eaters is like messing with evolution. In fact I think we should eat what’s left of ‘em. At least they will have done some good.


Now I have to go to bed, I'm in Darwin right now, and we're getting the shuttle bus to the airport at 5:20 tomorrow. We're flying to Cairns. So I better get some sleep. Hopefully it won't be long before I actually manage to write some stuff about the trip, and create an entry about Kakadu. Cheers and thanks for reading.

What animals do you hate btw?



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