---

Solo Slut Travel Safety (part 1)

Virtually every online travel site, magazine and guidebook offers tips on travel safety for solo female travelers. Wear a wedding ring. Carry a picture of your "husband". Wear a hijab to cover your head in Muslim countries and don't look Arab men in the eyes. Don't smile at men. Never get into a car with strangers. Don't talk to strangers. This is all great advice, but we already learned this from our mothers, and it's pretty much common sense.

But what if you're a "sexy in the city girl" who has saved up for that one week Caribbean vacation and you want a stress reducing, spicy fling? Or maybe you're curious what it would be like to hook up with one of the Jamaican "Rent-A-Dreads" who became wildly popular after the movie "How Stella Got Her Groove Back" became a blockbuster hit? Perhaps visions of the two strapping, Swedish backpackers you met at a hostel dance in your head.

Have you ever wondered if the Lothario lovers in Italy can prove that the Italian Stallion myth is true?

Getting drunk on an unknown local beverage, eating the worm and going to a stranger's hotel room (although it does sound like fun,) may not be the wisest idea. So how can you add a bit of spice to your life while keeping yourself away from dangerous situations?

There are quite a few things you can do even before you leave home to help to reassure your loved ones that you aren't going to end up being sold into a sex slavery ring.

If you're a spontaneous traveler who isn't used to calling a friend at 5:00am after a club closes to let them know you've gotten home safely. And you might not want anyone to know you've decided to spend the night with a hot guy you just met from an internet dating site. And calling family to give them details about your sex life may cause a bit of a heart attack for your mother.

But it's better to deal with a bit of embarrassment than to wind up with the fate of Roseann Quinn from "Looking For Mr. Goodbar." Some of this info below is common sense, but worth emphasizing.

1. Carry copies.
Before you travel, give someone close to you a copy of your itinerary, or as close to an itinerary as possible along with contact info for the hotel you'll be at. Make copies of important documents like your passport, the nearest US embassy, airline and flight info, bank, ATM and other account info and other ID's, including emergency phone numbers and give them to someone you trust. It's a good idea to also scan copies and email them to yourself. Carry yet another copy in your bag, away from your passport and money belt.

2. Carry your luggage.
Sometimes you might not want to carry a bunch of luggage to the airport bathroom while you're waiting to board. No matter how tempting, DO NOT leave your luggage unattended in public areas, and never accept packages from strangers. Not only is this stupid, unattended bags in airports, (even if you're only going to be a minute getting a coffee) will most definitely be seized and searched for potential bombs. Not only will that be annoying and possibly cause you to miss your flight, but since 9/11 huge fines are given for leaving bags alone.

3. Separate cash.
When traveling the golden rule is to split up credit cards, cash, travelers checks and bank cards. If you leave your hotel room or hostel make sure there is an even split between what is in there and what is on your person.

4. Extra ATM cards.
Always take an extra ATM card. Whether your card is lost, or melted in the hot sun (yes, this happened to me in Jamaica!) having an extra card eliminates a lot of stress, time and energy. Most banks will give you one.

5. Local Cell phones.
Get roaming on your cell phone or get it unlocked to allow local sim cards. Put in emergency contacts including local hospital, police, hostel and hotel numbers. If you can't find these numbers in your travel guide, contact the local tourist board. If possible get a local cell. I paid only $20 for a used phone with unlimited minutes for one month in Jamaica, and bought a cell in Egypt for $25, but renting cell phones is another option.

6. Use "ICE".
ICE (In case of emergency) is a program that enables as paramedics, firefighters, and police officers to identify victims and contact their next of kin to obtain important medical information. Enter emergency contacts in your cell phone address book under the name "ICE". It's best to list multiple emergency contacts as "ICE1", "ICE2", etc.

7. Copy numbers.
Whether you have a terrible memory, or like most people don't even bother to memorize numbers anymore since they're all stored on cell phones, print out a copy. It's also a good idea to write any passwords down in the back cover of a book, email it to yourself or find another safe place. To make it difficult for thieves, write your password as a phone number, or add letters.

8. Travel warnings.
The U.S. State Department Consular posts detailed Information Sheets (and Public Announcements or Travel Warnings, if applicable) for foreign countries. Before I traveled to Egypt I never imagined that there could be terrorist activity in Dahab, so I was lucky that I narrowly escaped being in a small resort town that had three bombs simultaneously explode along the main street where my hostel was located. Had I read the Consulate's website I would have been more cautious during my trip. I was just lucky that time, but now I try to be more aware and educated.

9. Stuff your bra.
Never let go of your passport. I had a second close encounter with danger when I traveled to Venzuela. I took a ferry from Trinidad, so no one warned me that President Chavez had told Bush a few weeks prior to my arrival to "Get all Americans out of Venzuela immediately." But I got the message one hour after arriving as I left the cafe I'd had lunch at and was immediately surrounded by soldiers with machine guns. They tried to take my passport, but I held it tightly as I showed them the information, then quickly put it in my bra. Never, ever let them take your passport. In many countries military police and others will detain you for hours unless you give them bribe money, if the even return it to you at all.

10. Learn local laws.
Each country has its own unique laws and customs, and I have put myself and others at risk by my ignorance. My hot Indian lover and I could have been put in jail in Bombay, a city I had assumed was cosmopolitan and modern. I had no idea until he later explained to me what had taken place that we had almost been arrested for making out on a public beach. We had also been approached by officers twice during my visit who demanded that he not hold my hand as we walked down the street. Another time we were not arrested but encountered an extremely embarrassing confrontation when hotel managers asked him to leave my room. It seemed that it is not legal nor morally accepted for locals to accompany a foreigner into their hotel room. Only travelers with foreign passports are able to visit each other in their rooms or reside in a hotel room together. And of course, if you smoke weed or do any sort of drugs no matter how harmless you believe mushrooms, ganja or other drugs to be, the penalties and consequences can be much more severe than in the States. Think twice before indulging, but also know each countries' laws. In Trinidad it is illegal to wear camaflouge. Whether it's a bag or clothing, I have heard of people being stripped in public by police confiscating their belongings.

11. Fake diamonds are a girl's best friend.
A few more common sense precautions before we move on to the sex stuff; don't wear flashy clothing or expensive jewelry, carry excessive amounts of money or unnecessary credit cards. Leave them behind as gifts for local friends you meet. I wore a cheap rhinestone set to a wedding in Egypt, and gave them as a gift to my host after the party. She was from a poor family, and they meant much more to her than they did to me.

12. DO NOT buy money on the black market.
I know, I know, when you're a backpacker on a budget, every penny counts, but it just isn't worth it. Almost always dealers on the black market are slick. They're doing illegal activities; there is a very good chance you'll be swindled. These guys are professionals. They aren't just shady; they're magicians who would intimidate Hoidini when it comes to making your cash disappear without you ever knowing it until hours later. Just use ATM's, money changing spots and banks.

13. Register with the Embassy.
Always register with the nearest US Embassy when you arrive in case of emergency.

14. Borrow some bucks.
If you do get robbed and have no family or friends to help you, contact your nearest Embassy. This isn't exactly advertised, but in a pinch they will give you a one-time loan and possibly buy you a return ticket which you will have to pay back once you return home.

15. Sleep with new friends.
(No, we are NOT at the sexy section yet.)
I strongly suggest joining one of the online hospitality and travel groups such as Hospitality Club, Global Freeloader and Couchsurfers. Not only can you find free accommodations with fellow travelers, you'll meet locals who can offer to host you or just show you around. Its a really help particularly for women traveling in Muslim, Jamaica or countries with high crime ratings.

16. Find another woman to travel with.
If you don't have a friend to take, or if you prefer traveling alone like I do, meet up with other female travelers at hostels or through one of the hospitality clubs as temporary travel partners who you can separate from if they get on your nerves.

17. Take a self-defense, and/or martial arts course. Check with a domestic violence organization or hotline to find one near you that specifically offers courses for women. The Brooklyn, NY offers either a self defense or martial arts class at a sliding scale, and they are free for survivors of any act of violence or abuse.

Center For Anti-Violence Education
Brooklyn Women's Martial Arts
421 Fifth Ave.
Brooklyn, NY 11215
(718) 788-1775
FAX: (718) 499-2284
Annie Ellman, Executive Director

A violence-prevention and empowerment organization teaching self-defense and martial arts to women and children. Available for workshops sponsored by community, union, business and other groups; can tailor curriculum to address needs of survivors of violence, lesbians and gay men, seniors, people with disabilities, and offers. Fees charged on a sliding scale for individuals and groups. Membership

18. Lie.
My first time in Jamaica I arrived in Kingston and was lonely and lost. I met a guy who said he was a reggae artist who seemed nice and when he invited me to go to hear him perform that night I said yes. I live in NYC so there are lots of small lounges where you can hear live music. I didn't realize though that Jamaicans don't go out until after 1:00 or 2:00am, and as we hung around at his friends studio, more an more guys showed up. The only two other women basically ignored me, and by the time we started off for the party I was nervous. I had only taken enough cash for a taxi back to my guesthouse, just in case. As we drove about 20 other cars filled with men joined us. I was really nervous, especially as we drove for at least an hour through a dark, deserted mountain. As we drove I pretended to call the "friend" I was staying with and told him, "She's so protective of me. Her husband is head of security at the American Embassy, so they made me give them your name, the address, and license plate of your car." (Actually, you should always do that when going out with new friends.)

I realized that I wasn't going to be murdered that night as we drove into a parking lot filled with thousands of cars, and at least 20,000 people for a "Reggae Sunsplash" concert. It turned out that I was with Capleton, Beanie Man, Yellowman, Elephant Man, and a bunch of other famous reggae stars. I was in the VIP area and had a great time, but it could have turned out to be a dangerous, fatal mistake. Now I get the address of the venue I'll be going to and take a taxi or local transportation.

19. "Chata" a taxi.
Many places I've traveled to have "route taxis" (also called "gypsy cabs") that cost less than a dollar, but they fill up with people along the route, sometimes up to eight other passengers. You don't tell them where you're going; they yell out to you what their route is, and if you're going that way you hop in. It's not always comfortable, but dirt cheap. At night, however, it's best to pay more and get the name of a "charter" ("chata" or "drop") taxi from a hotel employee who will drive you alone to whatever your destination is.

In Jamaica last year there was a gang who pretended to be legitimate taxi drivers. A woman would get into a route taxi and after a mile or so the driver would pick up two men. The men would then drive to an isolated spot and rob and rape the women. One was murdered. I have at times (when I'm really low on cash) take a chance on a route taxi, but the one time I was alone and the driver stopped to pick up other men I immediately got out and paid him, and waited for the next taxi. Be safe.

20. Meet ex-pats.
I always try to meet ex-patriats before I go to a new place. This was especially important for me in Trinidad and Jamaica where there is a large community of "Rent-a-Dreads." So many women have been scammed by men they meet on holiday, and the local ex-pats I met warned me about some of the worst characters. Try to find websites for ex-pats before traveling. In Jamaica, Negril.com is a great source where you can meet local female business owners from the states who love to share the local gossip about all of the scams some of the locals are running.

Sue's (from England) Easy Internet Cafe in the West End in Negril (where many ex-pats hang out) has written a mini-book which describes the horrific ordeal she endured when she married one of the most infamous and evil Rent-a-Dreads ("Clever Trevor") who ended up taking half of her house, and beating her severely. Really. She built a house and when she found out that he actually had SEVEN other women who fell in love with him, and were tricked into building him houses, buying him cars and starting businesses for him, she divorced him. However, a judge ordered her to give him half of the house. So he cut it in half, literally, and took it to another plot of land. She and other ex-pats created a website where they have listed the names and dirty deeds of the local scams. Women are warned about men who are prostitutes, who are abusive, who rob women, who tell women they can build them a house, dirt cheap if the only buy the materials, only to end up not having any legal rights to the houses or businesses.

Do some research and try to find out where ex-pats hang out or chat online. Also check out the hospitality clubs listed above to meet local friends and fellow travelers.

There are so many great blogs online, many written by solo female travelers who give great tips. Check out some of these blogs and sites.

mytb.org/aprilhope of course.

gonomad.

virtualtourist.

---