Free Inspiration

Normalcy Conformity: It’s a story of my epiphany, not so different than any other stories of epiphanies, but it’s mine… with a messed up title and punctuation errors… and I’m gonna share it anyway!! By: me, Elliott Clark…

Ok .. let me paint this picture for you. It was just one of those days..

I sit slumped in a chilled library. Through the corner of my blinking eye I catch a glimpse of my short shadow blanketing a stain on the carpet. Who could have made it? The brown blends into the grey with a morose malady of destruction. Why is it more interesting than what is on the table in front of me? I squeeze my eyes tight, my cheeks pulling my mouth into twisted confusion. I take my pale hand, run it upon my face, pushing and squishing my nose to the side and my eyebrows upwards. Once my fingers reach my hairline, I squeeze, pulling as much as I can restrain. I keep the grip and force out an afflictive sigh.

Behind me there are two books; Ambition and Burnout. I believe I am intertwined with them, but I don’t know. Burnout, I think this book may have been written for me. Is it my story? Is it my feeling? I stretch out my fingers to embrace a new batch of hair. Ambition, I feel it, at least I think so … I think something is holding me back… but I’m not sure... I pull my hand back down my face, pushing my eyebrows down, squishing my nose inwards, and dragging my mouth into a frown … I let out a rumbling growl of pain.

Homework is mounting on my shoulders as books pile on the table. Management and Interviewing, all I can think of is Burnout; all I can see is that stain. Trade unions and Economics, my mind keeps traveling. I stretch back in my chair, my shadow unmasking the stain on the carpet, a dim bit of light highlighting the mark for all to see.

The books are splayed out before me, bent and wrinkled, a literary crime scene. I wonder if they have lived up to their potential. They are dull colored books from the 1980’s. I don’t know what colors feel like, but I am sure these are my colors, my bent and wrinkled books from the 80’s. My eyes move from the daunting conglomeration of books. Blinking twice they begin traveling ...across the shaded stain and through a dusty window into a grim sky. Dark colors engulf me. I slump back into position, my lurid shadow camouflaging the stain.

Ambition is bright laden in crimson on the shelf behind me. All I have to do is turn around… ALL I have to do is pick it up!!

Fuck it. Something has to happen. The idea of a life of “78 channels with nothing on” begins to creep into my minds eye. It is a system, it’s a trap! I can’t stand it, regret invades my subtle thoughts. Something must happen; someone keeps switching my channel to some reality show. Why am I watching this? Why do I live with these dull colors staining my charisma? To see someone that is polished and gleaming with a lustful shine is maddening. I need to polish my colors and get rid of the stain! What is the secret? How does one live up to their potential? I need to get Ambition; the crimson book beckons. My future beckons!!

We all have our tables full of life’s nefarious “Burnouts”. We may all see the illustrious “Ambition”. What we don’t all do is look beyond. We don’t look into the reflection of our soul… seeking to remove the stain of life’s doubts and regrets which seeps through. One must look past life’s conformities and escape the trap. A revelation… Open your eyes!! Dare to remove yourself from everything you know. Challenge your beliefs and bridge life’s constraints... Live your dreams!! Now blink...breathe.. What’s next?

~Elliott

---

---