Purpose

I always say “Life follow its path. We follow life’s”. Even when that path is quite winedy and were not sure where we’re going to end up. It’s nice at the end of the day, to find some purpose in the reason for the madness.

As you know from my previous blog entry, I didn’t quite make things on time. I stood at a friend’s house in SanFrancisco that night. The next day I ate breakfast at another friend’s house and left for the BART (bay area rapid transit) from her house. On the BART, I ran into an Asian family…of course you run into these everywhere in SF but it was no coincidence that I run into this specific family, at this specific station as they are on their way to the same flight to Beijing as me.

I notice this because they all have suitcases, and well, their Asian. So I ask them if they’re heading to the airport and if they are also catching the flight to Beijing. They were, and since they had a baby with them, I helped them with their luggage. The airport had mine so my hands were free so I helped carry two suitcases all the way to the airport. At this time, when I lifted the suitcases into the train, the older woman said “XieXie”…It was my first realization as to the results of my actions and into Chinese culture…she didn’t reply back in English.

As we’re on the BART, we get into many conversations, but all of it just made me want to be in China more. Yes, their final destination was in Beijing but mine was in HangZhou. Much was I was already learning from them, and they were just the closest thing to it. As much stuff as I read, I look back 3 weeks ago as to how ignorant I really was as to the idea of living and knowing China, another country, another world. I also realize now how much more ignorant everyone else is.

Anyways, we get to the airport and I’m still helping them along with their bags. We get to the airline and I thought we were parting ways. As I’m waiting for my ticket (yes more trouble), her husband says to me “we are waiting for you right over here”…I thought how extremely kind that was of him. I was heading into China with complete strangers but not alone. Throughout all this time, talking to him, his wife and trying to talk to his mother, I felt closer to them in many ways. All I understood so far was that ‘they’ were going back because they had to renew the paperwork.

As we get there, I pass through security with them and wait for them as they did me. They had more things cause of the baby. As we’re walking to the terminal, they call all people forward who need special assistance (ya know, seniors, people with children). I wait back as they go forward and he hands me a bag and says “can you please go with my family as I cannot go with them and they need more help”. I looked at him and said “you’re not coming”, he said he could not, how it was his wife’s visa that was expiring and she had to go back with the baby. I asked for how long and he replied “2 months”…when he said this ‘two months’ to me, his face did not change but I saw his chest just curl up in my mind. I said of course I will. I grabbed a bag and the baby carriage and went forward with them and looked back at him as he said to me “thank you so much”, finally, in a different tone that just about broke my heart. It was true and pure sincerity from the bottom of his heart as he laid the trust and assistance of his family in the hands of a complete stranger, and still with a tone that he felt they were in good hands...oh how I knew I would not fail him.

As I walk forward with his wife, the baby and his mother. His wife begins saying to herself “I’m forgetting something I must go back” with such franticness that she’s trying to hand the baby over to me or her mother (my hands were full so I couldn’t grab ‘em). She turns around and tries to walk back with her hand up to her head and about to cry. Truth is she didn’t forget anything, just someone, and it was someone she could not bring. I’m watching her as she’s yelling his name to see if he’s still there, but no reply, he has left and in her heart she knows it. She walks back and grabs the baby and begins to walk forward. At this point I feel so many emotions, anger, sadness, confusion to name some.

I think I felt anger and sadness the most, not at anybody in particular but at the world. Since when did the laws of man overcome the laws of nature? Since when did this land become ‘my’ land and not ‘our’ land? When will the world know that though we may live as separate countries and in separate families and speak different languages, we are all one people! No family should be torn apart, 1 day or 5 years, especially for the sake of 2 sheets of paper. I’ll hope and believe for the success of this change. If not, "Success is counted sweetest by those who ne'er succeed” and I will still have gained something out of it.

I took the family all the way to their seats on the plane, put there carry-on items away for them and made sure they were fully comfortable and ready for the flight before I walked back to my seat. I did this because I knew that leaving them then, wasn’t just leaving to my seat. I was entrusted with a flame of gold from a complete stranger that still makes me feel warm about the world when I think of this. That the smallest light truly does shine through all the darkness. It makes me hope life isn’t that lonely for him as his family is so far away and may they have a speedy return into his embracing arms. I knew I would learn many things on my trip to China, but never did I think I would learn appreciation and trust on such a level so quickly and with an everlasting effect on my life that has just been over-whelming.

As I sat down in my seat and let a long breath out, I will admit a tear came to my eye. I grabbed my laptop to begin writing my day, this story…the universes purpose for me, Angel Negron, to miss my flight to help such amazing people. And as I do, it is the words of Emily Dickinson that run through my head for I believe she said it best, “Parting is all we know of heaven, and all we need of hell”

-Angel L. Negron Jr.

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