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¿Cómo estás? How are you?? Well Al & I didn't plant our feet on the ground until 8:30 am yesterday morning; that's late for this gal. But when we stepped out on our balcony those friendly palm trees waved to us & the ocean mumbled a low welcoming greeting 😊
Six fantastic days of weather without one single drop of rain. It's like the clouds couldn't summon up spit if they tried!
We've been blessed with good family times without the worry of a ticking clock; the hours seem to ebb and flow away like a bottle bobbing in the ocean.
Our afternoon started off with a frothy margarita that Odin delivered to me from the bar next door. Al took some pics of Odin bringing me the drink on a tray. (It was my suggestion for the photo so Al can study & learn how to carry a tray around & serve me food and drinks at home 😊 (see side pics!)
Later Al went off to meet Dave the owner of Abyss Diving who is from Revelstoke BC and has been here for 16
years. Dave will help Al get certified in scuba diving; (I'm "certified" just staying on land. OR is it "certifiable"?) No comment from the peanut gallery at home OK (smile)
So while the cat's away, the mouse gets a massage on our balcony. Heaven on a massage table. Monica who is Odin's wife has been blessed with magical fingers gifted from the massage gods! My lord! Talk about powerful healing hands. She's short, not even my grand height of 5 feet tall, rather round, sweet as all get out, but watch out, she has the hands of a sumo wrestler! She starts with a head massage including my ears, my ear lobes and my neck that was super dooper amazing. She's thorough in her back & neck massage which I'm not a big fan of because even the lightest pressure seems to bother me. However, when it comes to legs, feet and toes, ahhhhh. She almost does this soundless "this little piggy went to market" on your toes that stretches & relaxes your toes & then gives you THE foot rub of a lifetime (OK Al's outta the room so I can share this. HE actually gives the best
foot rubs EVER but I gotta tell you, she's gaining on him in the foot rub department!!) And when she does these mini karate chops on your toes all the way up to your head it makes you feel like you're lifting off the table in a zen state. At the end she massages your face with her thick thumbs that she swishes back and forth over your forehead like wipers that instantly releases all your tension. (She's so good she relieves tension you're going to have in the future 😉 Then she does your eyebrows? Who the heck massages your eyebrows and why the heck does it feel so good? Honestly I was so BESIDE myself with relaxation that I'd expect to see another one of me on a table next to me (get it? Beside Myself!!! All that for $22 CDN for over 1 hour on our private balcony! I gave her a very generous tip & also invited her to share a glass of wine with me. (Are any of you ready to hop a plane to Playa to get one of those "ay carumba" messages? It would be well worth it.)
So after that massage
I was all "loosey goosey" and went to pick up some guacamole & chips for a snack. I was all relaxed & darn it, I had to hear the very distinctive roar of a Harley. Geez can you give me a break? I know many of you have experienced the loss of a loved one way before their time and can relate to the sudden loss of my brother Bill. Many of you have talked to me about your journey with grief, and frankly grief is almost a taboo subject in our society. Grief or any discussion of it, is usually limited to a) those grieving or b) those counselling those grieving. We aren't taught about it at school, so when it happens the majority of us are completely unprepared for the fallout of what we knew life to be before this loss. No one will be immune to grief; not one living person will go through life without grieving over someone or something. Grieving is necessary and I realize it is as important to do as it is to breathe. It would be so easier to grieve in our society if people were allowed to openly share their heartbreak,
their loss, that their heart is broken in two and have a warm welcoming ear. It is a very normal part of our journey through life, and one that needs to be recognized and respected.
Coming to Playa has offered me a place to get some relief from grief because here is where we had one of our best family experiences; our wedding which Bill was in. For those of you who have read my blogs over the past few years, Bill was days away from his return trip to Playa when he died suddenly. So I guess this place offers me solace because of my memories with the exception of when I hear that Harley roar. My brother Bill had Harley DNA in him; it was a source of lifeblood for him. When we'd hear the roar of his bike, we knew we were in for fun family times. When I heard the sound today while walking, I forced myself not to turn around because turning around would make me believe there's a chance he's actually on that Harley right here in Playa. And then I'd be left with nothing but disappointment in the pit of my stomach
and the sad realization that it won't be Bill but some other random person who's enjoying the ride on their bike through this very beautiful place. There will never be a time he doesn't cross my mind. If ONLY he'd CROSS my mind & get to the other side and let me be free of grief but it's like he's just stranded in the island of my mind. (Almost like the photo of the Beatles crossing Abbey Road; forever suspended in time.) When I share this sentiment, quite often people say "Well at least you have your memories." Memories smemories, give me a break. I think of it this way, would you rather have your memory of a vacation or be on vacation? In other words, I don't want a memory of him, I want him back where he solidly belongs with his family. Keep in mind, that there was no goodbye with Bill. He wasn't sick, he wasn't ill, there was no bedside comforts, no final kiss, no final hugs, no comforting words for him to take on his journey. One day he's there fully ensonced in our lives, and the next he was gone like a poof of
smoke. It adds a different dimension of grief for those left behind. Grief as I see it, is a big bully that never leaves you alone, that can show up unexpectedly and harrass you, and can take over your emotional playground. Grief is like the ocean; at times it is calm but there are always ripples reminding you of your loss & other times it comes at you in huge waves, knocking you on your butt with its fury. And yes, once it subsides, you do pick yourself up, and it takes time to get your bearings back and you do go on. Life will never be the same, but those of us that have suffered it, we try and find the silver linings, yet we also have those knowing looks and feelings, that the waters will never be still again...
So I am the keeper of his memory flame on my blog and I have a ritual upon arriving in Playa; I get one margarita for him, one for me, and I sit quietly at the shore, and sip my drink toasting to him and feeling his presence. Cheers to you my dear Bill.
The great Kahlil
Gibran, a literary genius said it best. "When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your
delight." He was our delight & I continue to write about him because he shall not be forgotten. (Al & I are fond of Kahlil Gibran's quotes; and Al used one of his quotes in our wedding vows.) He was a brilliant mind that Mr. Gibran, and so was my brother Bill.
Speaking of brilliant minds, Al just walked in from diving. I must rise and greet him with his slippers and martini (OK flip flops and a Corona.) So on to happier thoughts now that the "grief" part is out of the way.
Tomorrow (Tues) is our tour to Akumal, a small beachfront resort town, and we are going to go snorkeling through the lagoon to the reef where we expect to see my beloved turtles, stingrays and whatever we are lucky to see. I expect Bill will hop on with us for the adventure; there's no Harley but there's an adventure in store which he always enjoyed.
PS the "life lesson" in my
heading is that the girls went to get smoothies at the yogurt bar. Kelsey gave the server $20 US & the server calculated the exchange and gave them their change back in pesos. Well when they got home they had $2,520 pesos equivant to about $200 CDN! The server obviously thought Kels had given her $200 US dollars and gave all this money back. I will continue this small story tomorrow...
Sorry for the long blog. It started with a single sentence and ended with a novel!
Hello mom, hello Ray & Pat, Cindy, Sandy, hello Blaine, Heather, Linda, Susan, Danielle, Linda, hello Shannon, Liz, Edna, Maureen, Sher & Megs, Caroline, Shawn, Lisa, Liz, Manon, Zully, Deb, Derrick, Audrey & everyone else foolish enough to follow these blogs! OK, this is turning into an episode of Romper Room. Remember "Romper, bomper, stomper boo. Tell me, tell me, tell me, do. Magic Mirror, tell me today, have all my friends had fun at play? I see so & so...
The irony here is I used to watch that kid's show and do you think once, just ONCE they could say, "I see Sally through that stupid mirror"??? Never.
Sally never seemed to be a popular name. Well today I say hello my friend Sally 😉
Time to go for god sakes. Pics below; click on them to make them larger. Love your comments; don't forget to check in to your parole officer (ME!)
ME in the mirror!
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Manon
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In Spirit
Maybe the sound of the Harley was just to let you know that Bill is there with you in spirit and that he is finally enjoying his time as much as you and is happy to finally see that true wonderful smile on your face which is what he always wanted to see. I too can hear how happy you are on this trip. I hope you continue to enjoy it to its fullest. That massage sounds heavenly, if only Monica lived closer to us in Ottawa.