Don't worry - I can pull myself off.

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Middle East » United Arab Emirates » Abu Dhabi
January 12th 2007
Published: January 13th 2007EDIT THIS ENTRY

Fossil RockFossil RockFossil Rock

Actually, this isn't Fossil Rock, it's Fraggle Rock
Got a last minute call from Mike - "Gerry says do we want to go to Fossil Rock?" Well, does an expat wife like to lie in bed until noon? So at eight o'clock, a surprised Shez (surprised to find there are two eight o'clocks per day) and I jumped in the LC and headed up the road.

The recent rainfall and cool night time temperatures, especially inland and at a bit of altitude, meant that the sand was a rich copper colour ("golden" as my Mum would say) and ideal for driving on. My increased experience (or cockiness as Sherren put it) ensured I got stuck a few times, although I managed to pull myself off each time. I need not have worried though, Mike and Gerry have been pulling people off the top of dunes for decades, and I'm sure they'd have been over to pull me off if I'd needed it. Most of my groundings were after a particularly steep climb, but I also managed to get stuck not once but twice on a pile of sand about four feet high - right in front of a group of Arab lads with tricked up vehicles doing some really steep hill climbs. The first people we'd seen for two hours and I get stuck right in front of them.

Apart from GPS, my co-driver was constantly shouting encouraging phrases at me the whole time, like "AAAHH!" And "F**K" and combinations thereof. It was heartening to have her confidence in my desert driving skill being so vocalised, with phrases like "I really thought it was bleedin' gonna roll over!" being screeched from the passenger seat.

To finish I just thought I'd pass on some of the expat wife jokes that are doing the circuit here in Abu Dhabi, and by circuit I mean going through my mind when I come home from work and have to open the window to let all of the Z's out.

What is the difference between a cat and an expat wife?

One is a creature that just lazes around the flat all day, napping and waiting to be fed, the other is a cat.

What single word ensures the husband of an expat wife gets a tasty and nutritious meal?


How does an expat wife ensure both arms get the same amount of exercise?

By getting the waiter to put her Gin & Tonics on alternating sides of the table.

What's the difference between a Literary critic and an expat wife?

The critic gets paid to read 5 novels a week.

Additional photos below
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Those Hummer tyres might be very grippy on the side of a building, but they are crap on sand.
Hello YesHello Yes
Hello Yes

Another inspired shop name, at least you don't get disappointed by a name like that time I went into Hardcocks of Norwich.

14th January 2007

Shez am feeling for you xxx

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