War is Peace

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Two certainties come to light when travelling: (1) Taxi drivers are scum worldwide (2) There are only two words in the world for tea - tea (the/te, etc) or char (choi/ca/chai etc).

I made the right move when crossing the border from Syria to eastern Turkey: cross at the rarely used border post in Qamishle far east Syria to reduce the amount of time spent trying to cross Turkey to Iran. The Lonely Planet tells you that the Turkish buses go everywhere and are cheap and clean. It doesn't tell you that at every bus station there are at least ten companies that want your business, with touts associated with each one who mob you as soon as you arrive and try to make your decisions for you. In the end, I end up telling each lying bastard tout to kindly swivel and I have to go to the information desk of every individual company to find out when the next bus is. Choice is one thing but that is plain stupid. My third bus of the day was the most interesting experience: after being "sold" onto this bus, it drove for 5 minutes and then stopped at a restaurant for 40 minutes while one old couple got off and had an evening meal. After they were dropped off at their door two hours later, the driver decided to have a dinner break for an hour. I got off 40 miles before I was supposed to because I was so incredibly pissed off (and it was midnight, running about 3 hours late).

Well, finally made it to Mad King George's "Axis of Evil". I haven't seen any evil yet but I am keeping my eyes peeled. At the border, I met 3 Dutch surf doods who offered me a lift to the first major city, Tabriz, in their camper van, which they are taking around the globe. I had my music CDs stuffed deep into my backpack as I heard that the authorities might seize them, so I never expected to be flying down the Irananian highways boogieing to the Pixies and the Stones. We had to stop off at a small town halfway to get new numberplates from the police. We asked the fuzz where we could get some grub, but their directions were crap (okay, I am being unfair: they were probably great, but in Farsi), so one copper got in the van and joined us at the restaurant!

In case you are a space alien reading this you will know that there is no booze here in Iran. Ever eager to get kicks, I tottled off to the tea shop yesterday to have a smoke on one of those water pipes. The ones in Egypt, etc. taste nice and, if you are a non smoker like me, make your legs go all funny. This one in Iran, however, was hardcore. It didn't have that nice appley flavour for a start and it tore at my lungs (good training for the streets of Tehran). I was seriously off my tits, had a voice like Eartha Kitt and had to stagger out without finishing. The bloke next to me was using his pipe for every breath.

Arrived in Tehran today from the night train at 5am (yawn!). There is nothing special about this place, it is a big big city - a bit like Bangkok without charm, booze and go-go bars. There are some interesting murals dotted about. I asked directions to the Iran air office earlier and was told it was too far so I ended up getting a free lift - for the third time in as many days. ( So no need for mister ChargeForeignerTwentyTimesAsMuchScummyTaxiDriver).

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Photos

Die Yankee Pig!
The former US embassy is now known as the US Den of Espionage and the outside walls are daubed with graffiti such as this. Come on guys, just make up.

Mount Ararat
Noah's ark was meant to have landed on this mountain on the border of Turkey/Iran, but nobody has found it yet.

Hitching a lift
After the first days experience with eastern Turkey's buses, hitching seemed a good idea. It was not my idea with the stupid fingers.

Big mural
Don't know what it means: it is okay to lose your leg in war 'cos our rulers are great?

Comments

[anonymous]

From Simon
No alcohol? So THAT'S why my booze cruise to Iran was a flop...