What happened after i couldnt be arst to write more...!!!

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The Rest Koh Pangan!

I was just extremely bored and reading my travel blog and realised i stopped writting like 3 weeks into my trip, this got me thinking what happens if i develop amnesia or some other memory disorder (which to be fair seems likely for me), i would never know what happened after that time....and this just isnt good enough!!
So now iv got to try and remember everything, while its still fresh in my memory, and for myself rather than anyone else, publish my memory onto the net so they are available forever!

Annnyyyway, that day i said i was gunna go to the pool in koh phangan, thats exactly what i did, chris came and joined me and we shared drunken memories of the night before while drinking more in the pool, carly and linds arrived then thats where my memory fails me and then next thing i remember andy and his mate rich coming to join us for the full moon party! As luck would have it, it pissed it down the entire night, but this actually made it alot of fun, in our bikinis dancin on podeums on the beach etc! We only took pictures in the room tho as we had no pockets and the rain wudda jus killed the cameras (my camera had already died by that time as i dropped it, but before that a virus had deleted all my pictures anyway..gutted!) Everyone ended up losing each other and every1 was extremely drunk, all i remember was returning to my room which was covered in sand and neon paint and had about 6 people laid on my bed, i tried to sleep curled up in the corner for an hour but at about 7 went to meet andrew who it turned out had been sleeping on a rock. This was when i left a very drunken carly n linds and went back to koh tao with andy! We started to go out (as in bf/gf lol) on the boat on the way there after a discussion and a few kisses n cuddles (awww lol)....I dont remember much about that journey, execpt i was sat on a wall waitin for the ferry and aload of rat sized ants were all crawlin up my sorts n arse n tht....proper disgusting....anyway, we got there earlyish with loadsa plans for the day but then laid on the bed for a second and woke up with it being like 9.30pm....the day had just dissapeared! But we went n had dinner on the beach then came back n slept some more before the 10 hour bus journey back to bangkok the next day!

So we travelled back to bangkok to andys apartment, which was borin cos it was sooo much fun on the islands and bangkok is a r8 shit hole, but was great to spend time with him!

Even more bangkok, Malaria and Malaysia!

So i had 5 days before my flight to malaysia, so did lots of things with andy in bangkok! We went to kanchanburi where the bridge over the river kwai is and went to a tiger temple which was crazy cos there were tigers n these funny pigs jus strollin round everywhere, andrew refused to take pictures with the tigers cos they were clearly drugged up but i was str8 in there! How often r ya gunna get a picture with a tiger lol! We did loadsa other things but my memory fails once again but thts probly due to me been laid in bed for the last 2 days on my stay...i thought i was dying which at first was funny but as i got worst n not better the humour dissapeared abit! Andrew thought i had malaria and it was lookin tht way, every1 wnted me to fly home but i wasnt havin any of it, i had payed to go to malaysia and how often wud i get to do tht, so i was NOT goin home early! I changed my flight o i cud spend an extra day in bed. But i couldnt hold it off any longer so i had to get up at 4am to go to the airport and andrew bless him got up and came the hour journey with me to the airport at 4am n waited wih me till id got on the plane then went all the way back to his apartment, all b4 he was due to fly later that day! Anyway i went on to fly to malaysia and met chris (the guy from koh phangan) and met soooo many awsome people! It was funny cos by this time i thought i was dying of malaria, i had ran out of money so literally had £30 left to buy food, accomodation and transfers back to the airport for me to fly home! It wasnt lookin good! We ended up stayin in the shittiest huts, it was literally a shed with a bed in the middle, no lights, no fan, just a mozzy net and a few tarantulas to keep ya company! I met soo many awsome people here tho and am sooo glad i went! Me n chris went on a trip and got to snorkle with sharks and turtles so i loved it! After i left the guys on the island i had a few days before i flew home so i stayed in kuala lumper for a night and bangkok for a night, i was surviving on a few pringles a day (which i made more nurishing by spreading butter and sugar onto them tht i stole from a hotel lol).

Lady boys, Kid napping and starvation

So i flew back to bangkok the day before i was due to fly back to england, and as i had no money, had to get ma mums credit card details and book accomodation online...i was surviving perfectly ok on my pringles and butter and so i really wnted to save the very little money i had left to buy at least something crappy for ma parents, just to show i thought bout em (and i literally starved for them lil gifts so ppl better have been grateful!) So anyway, i didnt end up getting to bangkok till like 9pm so i set off in search of this place called patpong, where i heard there was a cheap night market and it was near the airport. So i get to this place at about 10pm and get dropped off in what was literally the red light district of thailand with only a hand drawn map which id copied off the website i booked with! I must av looked hilarious cos my hair was frizzin everywhere, i had ma massive bag on ma back, a rucksack on my front and a stupid hand drawn map in my hands wlkin round all these sex bars askin lady boys and dirty old men if they could point me in the right direction! In hind sight i realise this was probly abit stupid but also in hind sight is very funny! By about 11 i was sweatin, my spine was colapsin under the weight of my backpack and i was seriously considering sleeping rough as i had no money to do anything else! As luck would have it, i strolled past a really posh hotel and the porter there saw my look of distress and worked out where i needed to go and got another porter to escort me there and carry ma bags! result! Turns out the hostel was down some dark alley and was the smallest little thing, however the rooms were awsome and i got free water, so it put an end to my dehydration! Bare in mind while allthis was happening i was really ill, so i wasnt the happiest bunny at this point! By then i couldnt be arst with the night market n was too scared to go back into that sex jungle, so i just went to bed but turns out the other 8 people in the dorm were dutch o sumthin like tht so struggled to sleep thru the annoying noises/conversations tht they were having....!

Annnyway, i woke up, still feeling worst for ware but feeling pretty happy i actually slept in a nice safe environment and figured it could only be up hill from here...all i had to do was find a shop, buy a few little gifts then get a taxi to the airport where i could just sleep and wait for my plane....obviously things arnt that simple when ur as gormy as me....
So i didnt fly till like 12 at night, so needed to check in airport at about 9pm....so i had all day, how hard could this be. Well turns out the sex district doesnt have all too many nice friendly soulvenere shops, everything was either closed or selling things im sure my mother wouldnt have approved of lol! This is what led to my kidnapping! I was strolling around, hoping to find some thai memorabealia on the floor when all of a sudden some smartly dressed thai man took an interest in my chang tshirt (chang=thai beer) after chatting for a while and explaining my distress he told me he worked near a superstore that was airconditioned and had many gifts for me to buy...this sounded splendid at my time of distress, so i went on to follow him to this place. After about 15 mins of wlking down alleys and into a proper rural district i started to wonder what was going on but he assured we were nearly there....when we got to a little alley and he did a special knock on a door, which i was led through and the door was locked behind me, i started to think hmmm this isnt good, but when i saw masses of gems and jewels in front of my i realised i had fallen for the only scam u are warned of, and the thing i had said i would never fall for...i had been led to a gem store and locked inside till i would buy something!! Well they had kidnapped the wrong girl cos i couldnt afford a tray of noodles, never mind gems! They had picked on the wrong person, anyone who knows me will realise how that would have pissed me off, i was hot, flustered, rushing trying to find a few pressies (i had been in thailand 6 weeks and hadnt bought anyone anything!) and i had to be at the airport to fly home, and here i am, locked in a room with some thai criminals!! Lets jus say i wasnt happy and got pretty angry with the situation, did alot of bullshitting tht worried them and after about an hour n half i was aloud to go without buying anything! By this time i was really stressed so went back to the hostel n thought i better stay there where i couldnt harm myself....but after a while decided to get on the super tramthing and travel to another area tht might have shops...risky idea but it turned out ok and i bought some crappy things and after getting lost for a while got back to the hostel safe and baring gifts! By this time id ran outta pringles and even out of butter, i was living off the free water but being as ill as i was this wernt helpin....having the equivalent of like £4 left, and needing to pay for a taxi to the airport (which costs on average £4) i could risk spending that money incase i couldnt get to the airport, so i set off to th airport at about 4pm, 8 hours before i was due to fly! I figured i could then eat with what money i had left (if any). Turns out i had like 50p left so managed to buy a packet of chocy biscuits which was awsome after eatting pringles for the past 4 days! With hours to go i set up camp and went to sleep, i felt soooo ill. But luckily enough i checked in fine and got onto the plane and allthough i was in the middle of 2 massive tukish men, who hogged the arm rests, and had a chair that didnt recline, all was well and i got home nice and safe and lived happily ever after....THE END.....i wish lol!

MALARIA/DENGUE!

So i got back to england, did all the greeting, nice to see u, hug hug kiss kiss, etc etc but basically went straight to bed, by this time i felt like death. Id felt like death in bangkok, and since then id spent 5 nights in a dirty hut with spiders n god knows wt else, survived on pringles as my only nurishment, dehydrated myself to death aving not had money to buy water, got lost in a red light district and been kidnapped, all before spending 14 hours flying through bout 7 time zomes adding jet lag to everything! After a few days of still feeling ill i went to the doctors who sent me straight to the hospital, the verdict was looking like malaria! But to be fair, after the places id slept in, and the lack of food id been eatting, having this lovely hospital room all to myself with a bed with a matress, ensuite bathroom, getting food brought to me 3 times a day and unlimited water, i wasnt complaining! So i set up home in hospital while they tried to work out what was wrong with me! After 3 malaria screenings they ruled that out, which was obviously good. But after a good few days of them asking for a 'stool' sample and me claiming constipation as to the reason i wouldnt 'go' in a cardboard hat and hand it over, they put it down to dengue fever...which it turns out can kill you, so i was pretty lucky! Andrew was still in malaysia by this time but he got an early flight home which was soo sweet of him and he came and kept me company in my lil room! I got alot of naggin off every1 sayin i should have gone home from bangkok and i was stupid to go to malaysia, but i was jus like blah blah blah cos i have lots of fun memories nw! After alot of beggin and lies that i felt fine, when my heart rate had gone down and temperature went dwn they let me go, yay! And that really is the end of my travelling adventure!!!
I hope u enjoyed reading about it and this will hopefully be here forever for me to read if i do happen to lose my memory for whatever reason!

THE END!

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