Nicest People on Earth

Hi All,

So I made it to the UK and have already had some pretty interesting experiences. I kept trying to book accomodations in Cambridge, but the internet connection wouldn't work to the site (this was in Salzburg) then the internet in Sweden was about three million dollars a minute (well actually 2 franks for 10, which is about 1.70 for 10 minutes....crazy) So I figured, I'd wait until I got to Germany, but they didn't have a connection I could get to in Friedrichshaven...they did however have the best salad I've ever had in my life - of all things I was not expecting to get at an airport. So I get to London just before 11:00pm, find the internet, and then call for places to stay in Cambridge...no rooms left in the two main hostels, and the rest wanted to charge around £50 for the night for an 'admittedly hot room'. I had about £50 of -how about you f.c.u.k yourself- and resolved to get on a bus to Cambridge anyway and to crash out on a park bench. It wasn't completely uncomfortable, if it wasn't for the homeless people trying to light me on fire while they asked if I had any cigarettes to go with their light....yes it was backwards day.

I hopped on the bus and the vey next morning to get to York since, I figured another 3hour-hobo lighting me on fire-sun coming up too early-night on a park bench was not an ideal situation. The bus was delayed several hours by a 60 car pile-up - yes, it's not a typo. I have no idea how you pile up that many cars on a bright, clear, sunshiney day, but somehow they managed it. Perhaps they felt they were sticking it to the man (more on this later). It also, coincidentily happened to be the hottest day in recorded history in Britain and the bus kept overheating (although the gregarious busdriver kept things light, or maybe it was the fact that the seats in the bus were vapourizing.

I sat in the back owing to the fact that I hadn't showered in two days and was smelling something fierce... Although, perhaps not as fiercely as Britain itself. It is the dirtiest place I've visited in Europe. Littering is not just ignored, it is expected, so it seems (actually, there's a big fuss in the papers recently about the scourge of littering; and oddly enough everything smells rather like day old mushroom soup - so I've been staying close to the soap shops; this beffuddling bit of olphactory information, may also explain why there are not less than 5 body shops, plus an innumerable number of others like it in the very small city center - their numbers are legion and the stuff of legend.

York was originally a Saxon city, but by 886 was conquered for a couple of centuries by the Vikings. Jorvik, as it was called, has left some pretty amazing archeological remains. It was a trading center, virtually unparallelled in these parts at the time. There is evidence of coins as far south east as the Sinai Peninsula. The museum was very interesting.

The people of York are so nice. They seem to be vying for the 'friendliest people on earth' award. They also have a penchant for sticking it to the man. This wonderful man at the GNER (Great National something Railway), who looked like his own charicature, eyes far apart, glasses think as last century's glaciers, mumbling and spitting as he talked, and sweet; you couldn't help but like him. He was trying to explain to me how I could use my ticket from London to Edinburgh by hopping on at York 'because there just happened to be a strike planned for the day I was going to be getting on the train'. So I just happened to come to York in hopes that I would avoid it....in other words: ~look cute - act dumb~

<In a side note: After two days in York I'd seen enough and decided to hop on the train with my shady ticket, a day earlier than it read. I figured, maybe I'd get kicked off in Newcastle, but that would be okay too. Well, the conductor gets to the fellow in front of me, checking tickets, when the guy starts to complain that the bathroom is fouling up the place. So he grabs my ticket, and the guy is still yammering on, so he doesn't even look at the ticket, he simply validates it....I was tres lucky. But I happy, because I simply did not want to spend another night in York....Edinburgh is freaking gorgeous...it was a good move.>

Switzerland, which I mostly bypassed due to the monetary rapings known to happen there, was likewise very cool. I went to visit a high school friend of mine, Janet and her husband Martin. The have a daughter and live with Martin's folks Charlie and Thesse, who were so sweet. Charlie regaile me with stories of the '33 plymouth, which has been in his family since 1937, and then of great car drivers and the photographical history of Lee Miller, whose photos are beautiful, and full of stories. She's not bad looking herself.

Janet had just one day off, so we walked around the town and she told me all about the craziness of the Swiss. It seems that they are obsessed with inheritance. Ironically, inheritance is a way of life. There are massive compendiums of laws surrounding inheritance, and the there are quotas about how much you must leave to each child or your spouse or charity. There are all sorts of family feuds that develope well before the person they're worried about bites it. In North America, it's uncouth and crass to say....hey when you die, I want this, this and this. In switzerland it's the opening salvo for a months long negotiation with Siblings. I found it fascinating. They also have a really cool system of semi-direct democracy, where people can vote directly on issues or cancel laws that the government passes. Here, the people are the check on government, rather than the other way around. California has a similar system that doesn't actually work, although in Switzerland people are educated and take the time to look at issues rather than electing bodybuilders and voting to destroy their education system - well done.

Janet and I went to the Beyeler Museum which houses some of the most amazing paintings for such a small building. It holds the likes Monet, Miro, Klee, Van Gogh, and Pablo Picasso's famous Guernica (which devastatingly was closed to the public that day - tear :..( Although, to make up for it, they had the world Matisse collection on display. The next day, Charlie took me to see hiscar and then to the bank of the Rhine where I swam the 1 or 2 km stretch of the swimming zone through Basel. That's something you don't get to do everyday!

Finally, Salzburg was wonderful. I stayed for a total of five days. I needed the rest, and it is such a nice city, full of beautiful sights and I kept meeting really great people. For a couple of days I hung out with this group of Aussies who were just hilarious. I think as Canadians (and they feel the same way) our humour just matches their's; it's sarcastic and dirty, self effacing and stupid. I reveled in it. I decided to go up to the top of the Hohensalzburg (the high up salt castle) and poke around. I had coffee up at the top (what the Austrians call Kleine Brauner) and took in the gorgeous view. I was worrying about my dwindling July supply of money, then left to return to the city on the ground. I shit you not, 10 minutes later this guy from China stops for me to take a picture, and we started talking. He offered me a job in China if I want to use Nanjing as a homebase while I tour China. I've emailed him to make contact, and I'll see if anything comes of it...but I felt better :)

The next day I went on the Sound of Music tour which was a little pricy, but I enjoyed it. The tour guide sounded exactly like John Lovitz:

John Lovitz

and our bus driver sounded just like Dr. Strangelove. As we drove by the statue of Abraham Lincoln (yes, in Salzburg) He explained as follows:

As you see on your left, it's a statue of Abraham Lincoln rinding a horse. Now you'll notice, he's reading while doing so... which as many of you know is...a...difficult...thing....to do. But Abraham Lincoln could do it! And THAT'S why he was president!

He was a very funny guy. He jokes were attrocious. He put every lame joke of all dad-hood combined to shame. It was genius. On the tour I met this really cool Kiwi woman named Harriet. She did nothing to dismantle my stereotype of what it is to be a New Zealander; in fact, she was the personification of that stereotype. But no matter, I had a really nice time with her...we even went on a proper date my last night there. I asked her if she'd like some company to Innsbruck, and initially she said she wouldn't mind, but then by the next morning for various reasons not involving me, had changed her mind. So we said our goodbyes and set off on our own quests to find whatever it is we are out to find. Parting is such sweet sorrow. I quite liked her.

I must admit here, as is my fault, that I'm in love with everyone that I meet <isn't that right mom? - It's your own damn fault though :) >. But I suppose it better to be in love with the world than driven to dispair by all of its faults, because in the end life can either be a tragedy or a comedy (to stick with my shakespearian theme), and I prefer the latter. It's a curse. Maybe I'm a hopeless romantic, that just hasn't figured out it's hopeless... But in the spirit of Scotland, if you don't like it 'you can kiss my ass.' But perhaps we will meet again. I hope so; she seemed something special. If not; I'll chalk it up to fate (I am, after all, a fatalist in the truest sense of the term). So time will tell...

Off to explore beautiful Edinburgh (I almost creamed my pants when I got here, I was so excited; it's so beautiful).

Cheers,
Cor.

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