“Not all those who wander are lost.” - J. R. R. Tolkien

..except me :/

Today has been a very interesting day. It is Thursday - which means I am free! Instead of really getting anything done, I decided to stay in bed and catch up on the Daily Show, Colbert Report and the Hills. It was very depressing. I started really questioning if I am really accomplishing anything by being here. I am not doing what I want to be doing - because I cannot financially do it. I started to get really homesick. I'm one of those people who likes to keep herself busy and constantly be achieving a specific goal. For example, when I go on vacation I cannot go on those vacations where you relax and do nothing; I like those vacations where you are constantly moving. I feel like by being here, I am missing out on more productive things that I should be doing. Will I regret this trip later? I started wondering if I came here to try and run away from all of my problems back home - because I am still lost here! I have always been very independent, but I really miss sharing my experiences with other people whom I connect with - on any level. Its funny because I guess there is this curse with being an Au Pair for this family - they told me the first day that their last 3 Au Pairs have all gotten married by the next summer. While, that seriously scares the hell out of me.. I can see why. Maybe they realized that they don't want to live their lives all alone and not be able to share any of their happiness with others. It is truely lonely; I feel like I am almost in rehab. Does that make any sense? I guess its good for me in the end because I need to be happy with myself before I can be happy with others. Afterall, all I truely have is myself.

I ate a slice of turkey and decided to go out walking because it was too hot to run and I have blisters. I'm not going to lie, there is nothing in Staufen from what I can tell. I wanted to find out how to get to the castle. Of course, like every student, I brought along my ipod and listened to music as I walked along but then I realized that I was really missing out on my environment. I got to Lenzberg and found that there was a market. There were so many people and things and it was pretty exciting. It is there tomorrow and I might go and have a crepe. I had to laugh at some of the things that were being sold though: old Sisqo T-shirts, "american donuts", and some really really interesting T-shirts that said things like "Georgia Perfection" or "Kiss my ass" and then there were hats that said Chicago Bulls or NY Yankees. I had the same experience in Spain and France. I was really hoping to find more Swiss culture in Switzerland, but even in the small villages there are signs of Western Influence. It was incredibly hard to find a T shirt with a french saying on it when I was in France and the same goes for here as well. Nancy* told me that it is very "trendy" to speak English and have shirts that say something in English. I then proceeded to walk up the hill towards the castle. There was no one on the way up - which worried me - but the sights were perfect. Cute houses with their gardens and vines growing up the sides of their white picket fences. It was a good workout. I get to the top and there were a lot of school children running around on their field trip. I walked around for awhile; I decided not to pay the fee to go in because it was all in German and I was not going to gain a lot from it. Perhaps later on in the summer I will go with the children. I found a nice bench to sit at next to the castle and read Wuthering Heights for awhile. It was kinda cool because the environment brought me back to the gothic era (when the novel was set to take place). Anyways, I went for a hike up the hill some more to see what there was. I get to the top only to go back down because I think there was some Swiss Army practice and it was intimidating. I didn't take any pictures of them, sorry. Somehow, I found my way back and went to explore the newer parts of the city. I found the closest train station and got some information (in english!) about different railroad passes.

I am stuck. I am trying to decide if I want to buy a rail pass and explore on my days off or stick around here instead. On one hand, when is the next time I will be in Switzerland? on the other hand, it is so expensive! I do want to see Geneva, St Gallen, Bern, Interlockin, ect. but with that comes buying food, ticket prices, ect. What should I do? I mean, I came here with the whole, "screw money! I have the rest of my life to work" but the only reason I am able to afford to come here is because I am an Au Pair. I do have to save some money or else next year will be very stressful! I mean, I do get to travel to the Matterhorn and all of the alps (the southwest part of the country) in June - not to mention Germany in two weeks and Croatia in July and August but I like to keep moving. I basically have three options: A Swiss pass, A Swiss Flexi Pass, or a Swiss Half Fare Card. A swiss pass would give me 4-consecutive days of unlimited train travel (195 CHF) which means I can use it as much as I want..but four days in a row. I could get an unlimited 1 month travel for 434 CHF. Or I can get any three, 4, 5, or 6 days of unlimited train travel within a one month time (249, 302, 349, 397 CHF) but those are the least discounted :/ My last option would be to buy a 99 CHF Half Fare Card that I can use for a month and any rail pass that I buy would be 50% less than the average price. Honestly, I like the unlimited month pass because I can go anywhere at anytime..but of course that it the most expensive. I don't know what to do! Any advice or words of wisdom?

I've had a very busy few days since I last wrote. Tuesday I dropped the kids off at school and spent the day in Aarau again. I love that town because of the mix of old and new! Their schools are very nice. The little girl goes to a private preschool that speaks German one day and English the rest. They want me to come in and spend the day with them; we will see how that goes. The little boy goes to a daycare translated into "little gnome" (oh those clever swiss!) by the hospital is Aarau. It is adorable and leaves the US system much to be desired. It is like a little house and has a huge yard to play in. They regularly take walks around the neighborhood or go on fieldtrips to the train station or the forest. I don't remember my daycare ever doing that! We spent most of our time inside. Anyways, I walked around the town and went into some shops, got depressed that shirts normally 10 USD were 80 CHF, and enjoyed the day people watching. I went to the country's largest department store, Mikos, and bought my brother a swiss football jersey and some chocolate covered bananas for his birthday (only because the bananas were so very random and a lil strange). I almost bought a jersey myself but I figure come Aug the prices will be down after the huge tournament this summer. I then went out to lunch with Nancy*. We sat on a balcony overlooking the city and it was beautiful. They family lived in North Carolina for about a year so we discussed a lot about society in America. It was very interesting to see her point on a lot of things. I was surprised at how much the Swiss follow the US news and election updates. Nancy* said it matters to the rest of the world who will be the next president and it is very important. I never thought of it that way. As we were talking, I could tell a lot of people were staring at me. I always feel so out of place speaking English here and it is almost embaressing. Anyways, I could go on and on about what we talked about but I won't bore you with the details. I then spent the rest of the day at the Arre River at a chic bar and had myself a huuuge ice cream cone. I then picked up the kids and came home. Wednesday I went grocery shopping with the family and spent the day around the house. Not much news here.

This is a very long post and I have more to say, but I am going to go and lay out in the sun before the house gets loud again!
PS. The pictures on this travel blog are not very good quality - I have more, and better pictures on my facebook if anyone is interested. okay, have a good weekend!!

*names changed for privacy

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