Women of Italy = Shotguns

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I fall in love with these Roman women at least once a day. Sometimes it happens during my tram ride to school, sometimes while waiting for my espresso to served at a local bar, and sometimes it's while I'm a few beers deep in a Piazza on a Friday night. Italy has a lot more good looking girls than in the United States but they're different. I don't know what it is but I haven't figured out how to break through the cultural barrier yet. When I pass these girls I purposely stare at them..it's partially because I want them to know I'm interested and it's partially because I can't help it. A mutual stare is usually as far as it goes though. I don't know if I'm just too nervous about the cultural/lingual difference or if it's the girls who are different. There's a lot of questions on my end and it's frustrating. One thing is for sure though and that's that I DON'T want a typical American girl while I'm in Rome.

I have nothing against the American girls in Rome but most of them are what I call 'stupid Americans' in the sense that they don't really have any desire to immerse themselves in the culture and they are mostly pretty fake and materialistic. This is not to say that every American study abroad in Rome is fake but there is un sacco (= a bunch, it's a fun word) of them. I'm friends with many Americans here because I'm American, after all, but in terms of looking for girls to mingle with, I just want them to be from Italy. I think the same would go for any country that I was residing in - people of a different culture are more interesting in most cases and there's usually an opportunity to learn/change from them (if you find the right ones, of course). Some of my American comrades in Rome don't really have the desire to try and get with Italian girls unless it were to fall in their laps and in stead they have resorted to girls from our study abroad group. I don't know what it is, but I find the challenge fascinating. I guess this a good time to declare my goal while I'm in Rome - I want to find an Italian girlfriend before I leave Rome. But, in this case, the word 'girlfriend' is said loosely and can be altered. I basically want to get with an Italian girl first & foremost. If possible, I also want this girl to be up my alley in terms of my taste..I want her to be down-to-earth, at least somewhat into fitness/health, fun, sexy, open-minded, and 'chill'. Then, if possible, I want to hit it off enough so that we stay in touch after the fact. Finally, if possible, I want to be official girlfriend-boyfriend and be able to call her 'la mia ragazza'. So you see, when I say my goal is to find an Italian girlfriend, actually being girlfriend-boyfriend comes last in the chain.

It's harder than you might think - I'm convinced that the Italian women are bred to be 'cold'. You see, Italian men are super aggressive and I've come up with the following theory: from a young age, women in Italy are sort of 'taught' to reject the average man and it seems like you almost need a bit of an edge to get in with them. Sure, I'm good looking and decently confident (sometimes more than others, though) but there's times when I feel like these woman don't even give you the time of day.

Or maybe it's not so hard. My Italian friends here always tell me how I have the advantage of being American and the girls like that - I don't see it. But, if this sentiment is true then maybe I need to learn how to better utilize it. Part of me thinks that perhaps my confidence is lower than normal since I'm dealing with everything that comes with living in a new country after living at home for all my life. Maybe I need to loosen up a bit and just be myself, not thinking so much. I know there's something I need to fix and whatever it is, I'm confident that I'll eventually find it out.

All my life I've never had a real girlfriend and I've enjoyed the pleasures of being single while embracing a few close female relationships. I wouldn't have changed it for the world because it let me meet tons of different people and get close to them. This is why it might sound strange for me to say my goal is to find an Italian girlfriend. I think the biggest reason for this is because deep down inside I want this girl to replace a 'best-friend'. Back home, while being single and going on all these trips and meeting all these girls, I've always had my best-friends to really connect to, feel comfortable with, and perhaps 'mack' girls with. I came to Rome knowing that I wasn't going with any immediate best friends but I was hoping to maybe meet someone who I could chill with on a regular basis, get close with, and mack girls with. But, in stead, I've just met a bunch of 'cool' guys - no one who I really connected with enough. I think my want of a girlfriend in Rome is my desire to connect with someone like I would with my best friends back home. I'm even convinced that if my best friends from home were here now, I probably wouldn't even want an Italian girlfriend. I'd even be willing to bet that I would have probably already hooked up with at least one Italian girl (along with my best friends) because I would feel more in my 'zone'. See, that's just it - I feel like I'm out of my 'zone'. I've lived a pretty comfortable life in the suburbs of New York City but I've never been without something I'm familiar with for long (such as friends when I travel). Now, studying abroad in Rome, I'm without my friends, without my family, without my Xbox, without my house, without my town, without my language, without my culture - everything's completely new and nothing's very familiar.

I'm not complaining - I know this is a learning experience and it's very beneficial to my life but I'm just not used to it and I think that's what I need to learn to cope with in order to feel more comfortable with everything (as well as with the girls!). So, in conclusion, are the women of Italy really like "shotguns" as is told in the great American mafia movie? Perhaps they are and perhaps they aren't - I haven't found out yet but I'm determined to learn the answer so stay tuned.

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P.S. I know I haven't been writing much at all but that's going to change very soon. I have a bunch of writing to do and plan of regularly producing a story at least once a week. So, check back often to read about my adventures in Italy & Europe as well as my hunt for an Italian girl.

A dopo, ciao!!

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