Wait…..really?

Only one more week? The only reason this doesn’t depress me is because I’ve loved this experience so much (a far cry from the first few weeks, I know) and I’m so thankful for it that I can’t possibly be upset about it now. I've already said goodbye to Aubagne, and I'll say goodbye to Aix in one week. I'll spend a few days Paris because that's where I fly out of on Wednesday.

It’s been awhile since I’ve written because I’ve been quite busy. And happy, as I briefly wrote in the last entry. I’ve been spending my time drawing with the girls (sometimes we do it for hours and then trade pictures and then try to label what the objects are); taking videos of Apollonia, who is a natural-born entertainer; studying; traveling (to Cassis and les Calanques, Avignon, and Arles for a violin recital); cooking with my friends (tempura, crepes, Moroccan couscous, and more); talking to old French people on the street when I walk around taking pictures; and other things my tired brain is forgetting.

I met someone that I absolutely adore, and it will be hard leaving him too. He’s the kindest, most interesting, peaceful, silly, intelligent, curious thing in France, I believe. And he looks like Johnny Depp. In his typical shy, humble fashion, he told me he doesn’t hear that very often but after going to a party this weekend and hearing 3 other girls shriek the same thing, I know I’m not the only one of that opinion. He’s a chemist, loves to listen to Brazilian music, plays 3 instruments, and teaches me Portuguese and Turkish (Flaky - watch out….I know some bad words now!). One of our favorite activities is lounging around with a Fr/Eng dictionary and learning new words together. He adores me too, and I hope that this isn’t our last week in each others' lives.

I’d say my stay here was divided into 3 different phases. The first was flavored mostly by loneliness and heartbreak, which, looking back, I feel like an idiot for having let those emotions get the most of me (but can you ever really tell those feelings what to do? I don’t know, but I certainly tried). It is hard to make an adjustment to living in another country, and doubly so when you’re all alone. The middle section was a typical, stubborn Annemarie-style determination to make the most of this, which consisted of studying really hard at school, a lot of introspection, spending a lot of time walking and reading, watching movies, meeting a few people but not really liking them and preferring to be alone. The last third has been the best by far: putting all these pieces together (happiness-wise, language-wise, etc), feeling like I can actually be have French conversation, meeting people I really enjoy, and just loving life to the last drop. These past few weeks have actually been so good that I’ve had fantasies of staying here on a tourist visa and going to Italy or Spain every 90 days to be legal. Of course my real problem is income, and I know I can’t ignore that any more. Thanks to some help I’ve managed to make payments this month, but without that, I’d have gotten into some big trouble with a few banks.

I hope my cheeriness keeps up. I am trying not to let my forthcoming unemployment get me down, and we’ll see how long that lasts. Living this sort of lifestyle (whatever lifestyle this is; I’m not sure exactly) brings so much satisfaction from learning and growing, but the other edge of the sword can provoke a little freak out here and there, questioning everything in my life and wondering how/where I will be living next month and what I will be doing to pay the bills. It’s hard melding optimism and reality sometimes.

For some reason I find uploading photos to this site to be a trying task on some days, so in the meantime, here’s a few videos of Apollonia (7 years). One is her poetry, which translates to: “The Animals. The animals can be snails or octopi or penguins or sharks but they cannot be trains. By Apollonia Hilverda. This poem is for the festival days of animals (snails, octopi, penguins and sharks) but not for trains.” Another is of her introducing various things around the kitchen. Another is random information on planets. (This video is on the bottom - click on 'Apollonia's Kitchen')

I hope the videos can give you a glimpse of the joy these children have given me. I’ve really come to love them (as well as their insanity and curiosity).

Here’s to never giving up essence of the 7 year old inside of you!

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Videos from "Wait…..really?":

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