A Quiet Family Week and the New Year


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Europe » France » Alsace
January 4th 2012
Published: January 20th 2012
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The week following Christmas turned out to be a quiet, relaxing one and what surprised me the most was that I actually quite enjoyed it and didn’t experience any moments of boredom. After spending Boxing Day with Aida and her family, playing on their Wii and watching TV (all the luxuries I am deprived of with the Fau family) I spent the rest of the week with the Faus.

The mornings tended to pass quite quickly after long ly-ins and for the first few afternoons I’d take the children out for a walk round the grounds of the centre to enjoy the warm winter sun. We were usually joined on these excursions by two children from the refugee families who our children get on well with. So I was often seen trooping around Rimlishof with a flock of children in tow, looking I’m sure like the perfect fille au pair. Although it can be quite difficult to be with children sometimes especially when you’re the one responsible for them, I also find it much easier than I used to. I often smile to myself to think how the person I was a year ago would look at the person I have become and the things I find myself doing such as helping a three-year-old go for a wee behind a bush or wiping the snot from a baby’s nose. I certainly think that God is laughing at me amusedly during these moments. And it makes me think of what the American girl, Melissa said to me about Him expanding my heart’s capacity. God is certainly expanding my heart’s capacity to love and to feel compassion for others.

During the moments that I wasn’t amusing the children I’d find shelter in my room to read and write and also spend time with God, something I find myself wanting to do more and more. I prayed a lot during the holidays that God would increase my desire to know Him, that He would re-ignite the passion in my heart for Him, which I felt was burning frustratingly low. And He has certainly done that. He has rewarded my patience and determination and I feel we are entering into a deeper level of intimacy. One of the books that I’m reading at the moment is by a man called Sammy Tippit, an American evangelist who felt God calling him to work in Europe. Reading about all the amazing things he did and how passionate and bold he was for God made me envious and made me ask myself what am I doing wrong? The thoughts that I used to have a lot before began to come back; thoughts that I wasn’t doing anything significant here in France, thoughts of how am I going to achieve the things God has set on my heart when I’m in this situation. But God has spoken to me a lot since then about this and put my heart to rest on these matters. One of the ways He spoke to me was through Cedric and Laetitia. We were sitting together in the kitchen talking one day and we got onto the subject of plans and visions that God has given us and how we tend to fall into the trap of wanting to fulfil these plans and visions straightaway rather than waiting for God. Cedric in particular I believe has experienced this a lot and I was certainly able to empathise with Him. But he told me that God has a time for everything and what Cedric does now as a father and husband isn’t insignificant in the eyes of God. In fact, what is usually seen as insignificant in the eyes of man is considered hugely significant in the eyes of God. I felt for a long time after arriving in France that what I was doing wasn’t at all significant but I realize now that this time was in fact hugely important. I learnt so many things about God and myself. God was preparing me, building me up, testing me. I learnt how to hold onto God through doubt, fear and uncertainty. I learnt how to trust Him no matter what. I believe that some of what I experienced was Satan trying to attack me. He knew the fears and concerns I’d had before coming to France and he used that to try and destroy my faith. If I’d experienced this back home I would have had my church family around me to help me and encourage me but being in a foreign country all alone, I had nobody except God and He became my warrior fighting for me. He also taught me how to counter Satan’s attacks with scripture; the Bible became my strongest weapon and I’ve never held onto God’s Word as fiercely as I did back then.



I know now that everything I do has a purpose and significance and although there may not be much glory and reward in what I do, I know that God is looking at me and cheering me on. Cedric put across the idea that even when he’s doing mundane, boring things such as changing the baby’s nappy, perhaps the whole of heaven is cheering him on in encouragement. I’d like to think that when I’m helping the family with the laundry or the washing up and preparing my English lessons, that God and His army of angels are doing exactly as Cedric suggested; cheering me on with encouragement and love.



On Christmas day we’d never got round to eating my supply of mince pies or the Christmas pudding that my Mum had brought over so I thought it would be a good idea to share it with someone from church. A family that God has put on my heart for some time now are the Aubergosts (the family I babysitted for one night). I hadn’t known them that well when I sensed God telling me to pray for them. I’ve learnt since then that they are experiencing great financial and relational problems. So when thinking of who I could share my supply of English Christmas goodies with I immediately thought of them. But when I suggested this idea to Cedric and Laetitia they weren’t too keen. Apparently Philippe, the Dad, reminds Laetitia too much of her own father and she finds it difficult to be around him. I must admit I had sensed a certain coldness in her manner towards him. So Cedric and Laetitia told me that they needed to prepare themselves emotionally if they were to invite them over. I explained to them both the burden God had laid on my heart to pray for the Aubergosts and how I truly felt a need to bless them. And I admitted that Philippe reminds me a bit of my own Dad too; he comes across as being very nice and friendly but I sense something colder and more bitter beneath the surface, something which I’m sure comes out when he’s with his family. But I feel that’s all the more reason to bless them and I tried to explain this to Cedric and Laetitia. As Christians if we invite into our homes only those who we like and get on well with, what kind of Christians are we?



A lot of what Laetitia has told me about her own Dad reminds me of my Dad too and I have tried to share with her some of what God has taught me about this. On Christmas Day she phoned her Dad but ended up having a terrible conversation with him and so has decided not to call him again but to write instead. I told her what God has taught me about needing to look at my Dad with the eyes of God rather than the eyes of man. When I look at him with the eyes of man I see someone who can be difficult to talk to and get on with but when I look at him with the eyes of God I see someone who is broken and hurting and in need of unconditional love. I admit I may not have loved my Dad as well as I should have done but through imparting some of God’s wisdom into Laetitia’s situation, I have been reminded of my own need to love my Dad more, no matter how much he hurts me.

On New Year’s Eve we were all invited to spend the evening at Rimlishof who had organised a party for all the regular guests at the centre. I had been reluctant to go because I feared I would spend the evening with no one to talk to but I’m so glad I went. It was my first and best New Year’s Eve party. I even went to help with some of the preparations beforehand and got given the awkward task of folding paper napkins into stars. Everyone else was much more talented at this than I was so I only ended up folding a few napkins, of which I was glad.

When we arrived at the beginning of the party (only 20 minutes late) I was unhappy to find that I’d been arranged to sit on the youth table. Despite asking if I could sit with the family I did in the end decide that this could be a great opportunity for me to make some French friends and that I should at least try to sit with them. But after the necessary small talk was over the four girls that I was sitting with made no other attempt at conversation with me and the noise levels in the room were so high that I couldn’t make out what they were talking about even if I’d wanted to join in their conversation. So as you can guess, I decided against spending the whole evening sitting in silence and moved across to my family’s table, despite what offence it may have caused to the girls I’d been sitting with.

Also sitting on the family’s table was an old lady who was clearly disabled and her carer. They turned out to be lovely women and we spent a pleasant evening together although it was rather difficult to hear what the old lady was saying sometimes so whenever she opened her mouth to speak I’d find myself leaning as far over the table as I possibly could in an attempt to hear her. I learnt during the course of the evening that she’d been in a serious car accident and it was only through a miracle that she’s been able to walk again. I found myself liking both the women a lot and I hope that I might be able to see them again one day.

The evening was made even better by the food. There was a small starter of salad and a meat ball thing followed by sorbet dipped in an alcoholic/non-alcoholic liquid. After that we were treated to the Swiss delicacy of raclette (the thing with potatoes and melted cheese and ham). By the time we’d battled through the mains it was nearly midnight so Alain, the director led us in some hymns. I would have preferred something a bit more lively to see in the new year but I guess God sees our hearts towards Him and that’s all that matters. After the hymns there was what seemed like a very boring sermon (I couldn’t understand what was being said but I guessed it was boring by the expressions of those around me) and then a prayer. After the prayer Alain announced that we’d entered the New Year and so wished us all a Happy New Year. But what about the countdown? I couldn’t have my first New Year’s Eve party with no countdown. Luckily the youth shared my thoughts and began their own countdown which everyone joined in on.

Then the champagne was opened and everyone began wishing each other a Happy New Year. Some of us went outside to watch the fireworks which were just about visible in the nearest town. I felt so happy and content and was flooded with a sense of excitement and anticipation for the year ahead. It was then I think that I began to realize what a great adventure God has brought me on. I’ve heard so many people tell me how exciting it must be but for a long time I’ve failed to see the excitement. Now however, I am beginning to see it. God can do anything when we trust Him. We just need to have enough faith to believe that. And we need to be willing to let God take us on the adventure. I fought it for such a long time but now that I trust God I can stop fighting and learn to enjoy it instead.

After some fireworks of our very own which the director set off on the hillside, we all returned inside to conclude the evening with a chocolate fondu. The French really know how to have a good party!

Cedric and the rest of the centre’s staff had been waiting on all evening and were expected to clean up everything afterwards so I offered to help. It reminded me of my waitressing days when we were left to clean up after a big Christmas party but this time it was much better because I was doing it out of a desire to help rather than a desire to earn money for myself.

I didn’t get to bed that night until three o’clock in the morning. I was exhausted but content and consoled by the idea of a long ly-in the following morning.





I had no plans for New Year’s Day and neither did the family. Everyone was too tired to do anything but in the evening we invited Julie and Fabrice, some friends from church over to share the mince pies with us. They’re a nice young couple with two small children (their daughter is the same age as Raphael and they’re the best of friends). We spent a pleasant evening together and I was surprised at how much I enjoyed it. I find I understand conversations a lot easier than I used to so I’m less easily bored. I had no desire to leave and escape to my bedroom as I used to when Cedric and Laetitia had company over. I was even involved in some of the conversation and able to contribute a great deal. This is really wonderful after my first experiences of social situations in France.

The last day of the holidays turned out to be Cedric’s 31st birthday so Laetitia had organised a birthday lunch and had invited various people round during the day. Due to the short amount of notice I’d been given regarding Cedric’s birthday and my awkward financial situation I ended up buying some fairy cakes and the necessary ingredients to decorate them, which I let the children help me with. I had also written out a card but it happened to be a children’s birthday card (the only one I had in my bedroom) because the only shopping trip I’d taken had been with Cedric and I didn’t think I’d be able to get a more suitable card discreetly enough. But during the course of the day I learnt that giving birthday cards isn’t really a French thing so I was saved the embarrassment of handing the card over. I still think it’s a bit strange not to give birthday cards.

For the birthday lunch Laetitia prepared a starter of avocado, tuna mayo and a hard-boiled egg with some salad. But the main course was the best part – another cheese fondu! We’d invited Fred, Cedric’s brother round to eat with us so it was more or less as it had been on Christmas day when we’d all got tangled up in ridiculously long strings of cheese. But this time we played a little game; anyone whose piece of bread fell off their stick as they we were dipping it in the cheese had to do a forfeit. Cedric pointed out that I would be doing most of the forfeits because last time we’d eaten cheese fondu my bread had fallen off nearly every time. This time however, I made sure my bread was securely attached to my stick before dipping it into the cheese and it didn’t fall off once.<span> One of the forfeits was changing the baby’s nappy so I was glad that I was saved from doing that awful task, despite asking Laetitia the week before to show me how it was done (I was feeling particularly brave). But after that experience there is no way I’d like to do it myself. The smell nearly made me vomit and the nasty sight of what was inside the nappy has scarred me ever since. I stick to my promise that I shall only have two children when I’m older.

In the afternoon after our fondu fun was over we shared what is known as a Bouche (the traditional French Christmas dessert) with Lydie, a lady from church. Not long after some more friends came over to share Cedric’s birthday cake which Laetitia had made and which I had helped her with (the best part was getting to eat the left over crème Chantilly).

We concluded the day as a family sitting in front of the computer to watch one of the dvds which Laetitia had bought for Cedric’s birthday.

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