katetheyak
DECEMBER 2009: for the sake of sentamentality, im simply unable to eraze my original profile entry i wrote in 2008 before i caught travel bug. While looking at it now makes me cringe at all the evidence of my innocence and (verbal flatulence), I have an equal sense that were it to be updated/edited it would no longer represent the truth. Have a look at the map for more information as to where i travelled during/after my time in Nam and where I ended up! Enjoy!katetheyak
AUGUST 2008:
friends, you have come to the right place
woohoo my very own travel diary! this will solve everything!
after weeks of listening to people asking me if im suitably scared of travelling solo thousands of miles (in a big metal tube 30000 feet up) to a distant, alien land (Vietnam) with strange foreign customs (no patting people on the head)- its apparently X100 worse than mentioning the war to the Germans) and even weirder food (sticky or dry rice - the interminable question), i have succumbed to their infectious terror. I leave in four weeks time, i have my giant rucksack which i can nicely squeeze into AND zip up, most of my jabs (tetanus is the worst, which is surprising - i thought rabies would be), im about to order my US dollars to bribe the custom officials for a visa (Im in a dodgy, uncomfortable situation where the people im going to work for as a teacher (ILA) are sending me a letter in Vietnamese to give to the friendly man weilding a gun at the immigration desk in Saigon).By the way, tieng Viet is possibly the worlds most difficult language due to it being tonal, i.e., if i said the last sentence in wrong pitch in said language it would probably insitunate bad things about your mother.... But hey Im Irish right? The Vietnamese and the Irish are brothers...sorry... comrades in arms right? we all experienced the oppressive hand of the colonial machine and triumphed, finally selling out to fiendish capitalism. surely we have lots to share.
follow my blog updates to track my journey into the wild. i promise surpassing all of your expectations and destroying my misconceptions about this fascinating country. Included will be:
possible prison photography if they let me keep my camera
satanic-driven ramblings about teaching 6-17 year olds
yakkings about my biggest concern in any travel i undertake: food
details of any other trips i make once deported
Travel Blog Posts
guiri´s and natives, is there any hope?
Published: December 9th 2009Europe » Spain » District of Madrid » Madrid
December 9th 2009
A few weeks ago, I had an impromptu dinner after work at La Epoca near metro Alonzo Martinez. The ‘Peter Andre’ camarero (I swear Jordan is in that kitchen!) gave us penniless teachers copious amounts of free wine which resulted in a heated discussion about the attractive qualities of Spanish men. We brainstormed and suggested overly-scrawny, too into their looks, excessively slimebaggish….then we discussed how when we returned home, the natives of our respective countries were suddenly easier to talk to and somehow more desirable. There was an absence of a shared sense of humour in potential Spanish partners. After being away, your own culture and a shared history becomes rather important or binding somehow. But perhaps, this being a travel blog after all, an illustrative anecdote is necessary to clarify my point. Today, I did ... read more
December 9th 2009
One of the most stressful periods I never wish to discuss again (after writing about it here, blogs are free therapy) is flat hunting in Madrid. Work was due to start in October and, even though I had arrived two weeks early, I was, by the end of September, seriously lacking fingernails. Every deal that seemed likely fell through at the last minute and I was seriously considering living with a fifty year old transvestite who offered me a room in Lavapies, the emigrant blue collar neighbourhood of the city. The most attractive quality about the room itself was its lack of natural light. Without a window, I could barely (thankfully) make out the other features: a double bed on three legs, a permanently noisy washing machine (even when switched off) and a resident pet dog ... read more
NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH TO APOLOGISE
Published: December 9th 2009Europe » Spain » District of Madrid » Madrid
December 9th 2009
The transition my brain had to make upon moving to Spain was immense, coming from Asia. My first realisation I was back in ‘civilisation’ is ironically a very uncivilised tale itself. For the first time in my life I am living in a city with one of the best transport systems in the world. My first rides on the metro produced excitement akin to what the first moon-walkers must have experienced. I had thought unbroken pavement and occasionally effective pedestrian crossings the height of sophistication but the white and blue whish and whoosh of the metro literally blew my mind! After a year in S.E. Asia negotiating with a wizened, toothless fifty-something-year old man for a lift across town on his crumby Honda, arguing for the sake of five cents, the logical certainty of Madrid’s ... read more
out of the marvellous and volver to the normal
Published: December 8th 2009Europe » Spain » District of Madrid » MadridDecember 8th 2009
At the end of October, when it was still warm and leaves clung onto Madrid’s trees, my parents rang to say a large brown box had arrived safely in Cork from Vietnam. At the time they phoned, I was chewing down a jamon y queso asado near Calle Serrano, before racing to the first Colegio of the day at Santiago Bernabeu (where the Real Madrid stadium is) to teach nine eight year old chicas. I wasn’t sure at first why they were telling me about Vietnam and the mysterious parcel; obviously the mysterious box had been delivered to the wrong address. However, as my mother listed the contents, I suddenly remembered with extraordinary clarity that day in June, at Buu Dien Thanh Pho HCM. I had struggled to carry all my worldly possessions across town on ... read more
MOT HAI BA YO....on the central coast 08/09
Published: January 29th 2009Asia » Vietnam » South Central Coast » Hoi An
January 29th 2009
In the domestic terminal of HCMC’s Tan Son Nhat airport in December 2008, I solved the mystery of why the only people you ever hear of being the victim of petty crime this city are predominately western, frequently tourists. Yes, ‘westerners’ are relatively wealthy set against a backdrop of South East Asia and, yes, they are vulnerable with their uniform, copied Lonely Planet maps, their ‘whiteness’ that emphasises their lack of familiarity with their surroundings. But here, waiting for my flight to Danang, it all suddenly makes sense. The terminal was swarming with backpackers, French tourists and well-dressed Vietnamese. I was on route to the central coastal regions of Thu’a Thein and Quang Nam provinces. Considering at this point I had lost my voice and had resorted to a pantomime routine at ILA, a break was ... read more
getting happily sidetracked during Tet Nguyen Dan
Published: January 28th 2009Asia » Vietnam » Southeast » Ho Chi Minh City
January 28th 2009
When I return to Ireland and my mother uses her favourite catchphrase ‘What did your last maid die of?’ I shall reply ‘She didn’t die, she’s alive and well in Vietnam to the best of my knowledge.’ Yen (pronounced ‘Ying’) has arrived on the first day of her New Year to clean my apartment. She can’t clean her own house as sweeping the floor on such an auspicious day is considered bad luck. You may sweep out hidden money which would be a disastrous omen for 2009. Before all of you call me a lazy good-for-nothing expat for hiring a personal slave, consider first Yen’s magical abilities. I have been banished to the study while she hides the beer bottles, removes the crumbs and coco pop residue and miraculously returns the apartment to its original, immaculate ... read more
What is normal anyway? Fields of Athenry, motorbikes and Tet...
Published: January 25th 2009Asia » Vietnam » Southeast » Ho Chi Minh City
January 25th 2009
Last night, I fell into one of those fitful sleeps caused by too many celebratory Saigon beers (there’s no such thing as alcoholism once you are a teacher, it’s just called R and R and I‘m on Tet holidays) and the ominous howling of neighbourhood mongrels, interspersed with squabbles between them for meagre bits of food. The steady persistence of a low-rolling drumbeat, the sounds of inflating unidentifiable animal cadavers and my new additions to my growing collection of mosquito bites forced me awake this morning. And, as if to remind me I’m in Vietnam, right now I can see from my apartment, what appears to be a mass of balloons, so many you can’t see the man holding them (not even his feet) ‘walking’ down the street. All around, on the streets and in living ... read more
'tis the season to be commie
Published: December 28th 2008Asia » Vietnam » Southeast » Ho Chi Minh City
December 28th 2008
When the Vietnamese celebrate Christmas they must understandably get confused. I personally don’t blame them. On paper, HCMC has everything for the ‘perfect’ Christmas, similar to what you see in Hollywood movies. With it’s marriage to anything tacky or eighties, in particular the city’s passionate love affair with neon-lighting, it is a fertile ground for the festive spirit to manifest itself. I wouldn’t be surprised if, before he was reincarnated as Santa, Mr. Claus was a Vietnamese Viet Cong guerilla in the entertainment division with a catchphrase like Ho Ho Ho. Yet, as is often the case here, all is not what it seems. For starters, artificial snow is never convincing when it’s 30 degrees in the shade. And then there is the native population’s bizarre obsession with Disney fantasies. (They al... read more
November 16th 2008
“I’m a bee that’s buzzing loudly. Come on now, everybody, put your hand on your throat, feel that vibrating ‘z’ sound. BuZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ZZZZZZ. Louder my class of ZZZZZealous students, Do it like a craZZZZy Western teacher who likes ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZylophones. I’m buZZZZZZing. You’re buZZZZZZing. We’re all BuZZZZZing.” Now that I’ve been writing here to my faithful readers for some time, (my parents, it seems, are my most avid fans), it seems appropriate to quote my own poetry at a time like this, especially when the above words so accurately reflect my present state. I’ve just returned from a cup of coffee. Wait. That doesn’t explain anything. I’ve just been a victim of Vietnamese coffee. There, that’s much better. You would think there would be nothing simpler, right? WRONG!... read more
friends, romans, countrymen: lend me your dictionaries...weeks 3/4/5
Published: October 28th 2008Asia » Vietnam » Southeast » Ho Chi Minh City
October 28th 2008
As usual, it takes a thunderstorm to give me an excuse to write my blog. Unless you want to take a lunatic of a xeom driver with an addiction to speed and a strong belief in his own immortality, under a thin sheet of plastic (visibility nil), you are ultimately trapped in your guesthouse in a rapidly flooding alleyway. For once, I’m pleased, seeing as it’s been a few weeks since I last blogged. I’m trying to recall all that I’ve been doing but I know that merely telling you won’t be enough to do Vietnam or HCMC justice. In the past three weeks, I’ve been to Vung Tau (coastal seaside city about an two hours south east of HCMC), the Cu Chi area (where the ubiquitous tunnels are located), Cao Dai temple (massive structure that ... read more
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