Krabi, 07-02-2009. Travelling in Thailand as a Farang I have two options. I could enter one of the many travel agencies that dot the streets of any Farang rich tourist destination in this oriental Kingdom. In which case I'll travel either in air-conditioned mini-bus or else by a big huge tourbus with comfortable reclining seats, a built-in smelly toilet and a monitor above the driver blaring away most of the trip surrounded by backpack travellers from all over the world swapping travel stories in a multitude of languages while the driver himself is knocking down small bottles of Red Bull energy drinks to stay awake after a night's partying. My other option is local buses with wooden seats of the non-reclining type and surrounded by locals on a visit to relatives and exchanging the gossip of ... read more

Kho Samui, Na Thon. 06-02-2009, evening. The main weapon of married Thai women on the notorious philandering outside the marrital bed of their cheating husbands is severing their partner's male organ, often tying the now useless but in the past highly overused male equipment to a hot air balloon, let it fly across the Thai countryside, maybe get picked up by a malignant ghoul or else a benevolent entity from the spirit world. Dumping this particularly male piece of pride on the family's garbage heap is also a serious option. Let it rot with the household rejects and when it has become a stinking swollen yellowish shadow of itself, get eaten by the rats and cockroaches. No wonder rats and cockroaches are the only lifeforms that seem to be bigger here in the East than back ... read more

Kho Samui, Hat Lamai, 05-02-2009. I'm watching the girly bars opposite the road from the 7/Eleven while working slowly but with determination on a small can of Leo beer, my favorite brew in this part of the world, how the Hot Mommas do their best to lure a hamburger fat 300 pounder, still a young bloke who probably feels like King Rat in this part of the world. He must be on burdensome mission, I mean the lust in his eyes is pure and obvious while he blows them kisses but quickly moves on down the road. Maybe he is the possession of an empty wallet or else has had his satisfaction already several times today. From what I can see his Karma is not lashed yet by a life time of Western introduced Guild Complex, ... read more

Around Kho Smaui, 03-02-2009. The amount of farang people on Kho Samui with medical bandages wrapped around elbows and knee caps is staggering. Victims of traffic accidents on Kho Samui's curvy roads caused by a combination of factors...People going home on a rented scooter after a heavy drinking binge at one of the island's many bars, slippers on white feet that make it difficult to shift gears and , of course, the state of the roads. The Kho Samui Hospital must be in constant full-time overdrive. Feeling in the mood for a sweaty day of cycling under a scorchingly hot Thai sun I decide to hire a bicycle longingly rememebering my last time on this island, my last stay in Hat Lamai when I had a local ladyfriend who rented out scooters and two Harley Davidsons. ... read more

Kho Samui, Na Thon, 01-02-2009, early evening. Showered and in fresh clothes I walk down the stairs of the Nathon Residence, my eyes scanning the lobby for possible Lady Recepcionist related "problems". The old Chines man in his grizzly white underwear still reading his Chinese newspaper eyeing me knowingly from over the top, though his d*rned newspaper hides most of his wrinkled yellowish face I know for sure he is wearing a dirty grin on his mouth, having all sorts of s*xual images in his old man's head about what happened upstairs when the lady receptionist showed me my room. Bending over the reception to hand her my key I notice she has changed from her knee short skirt into a tight fitting jeans, her hair has gone from a pony tail to modestly hanging across ... read more