 Tyrone Biggums - Tyrone | All Comments |
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| 7th December 2009 colin | India - From: Dongchimming the Turkey prepare to become very well acquainted with your gastro intestinal system and toilets without buttons or bum warmers. For that matter, you will probably find yourself in a majority that dispense with the whole 'bowl' concept. Gringos should be wary of squat toilets and flip flops. If you go to Agra (Taj Mahal), stay at the hotel Noor Jahan on Taj Ganj (street name). Manoj makes killer buffalo steak and the view from the rooftop is well remembered. saludos |
| 7th December 2009 Sarah | WOO! - From: Dongchimming the Turkey I finally found your blog on Frank's blog. I can't wait to see you in INDIA! Miss you guys!! |
| 7th December 2009 Christine | - From: Dongchimming the Turkey Nice scarf!! LOL! Little chilly willy there?? Lots different than the Carribean!!!! India, huh??? WOW! You are a traveler...hope you are well!! Miss you bunches.....Heart, Pook |
| 17th November 2009 Jeni | Movie selection - From: The most extraordinary piece of wit and wisdom that America has yet contributed I'm very happy for you in the aspect that you can now watch new movies. Also, this is not only my favorite pixies song, but the single most appropriate use of this song in the history of the world. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkUaV9GZDuk |
| 2nd October 2009 mark | maturity - From: Come Along to AwesomeDong at some point, i need to grow up. Someone cheering a win by their local sports collective had "Go Beavers" up on the facebook page and i couldn't stop laughing...much as i do every time i see a dong on your blog. |
| 2nd October 2009 Josh | Where do I apply to be a buddha? - From: Come Along to AwesomeDong "I gave you things you couldn't even pronounce." -- undoubtedly true if you bothered to get me anything in your travels. I sent you a Christmas gift once, remember that? Also, your Korean situation does not forgive not mentioning Greinke's ridiculous Cy Young case. Jerk. ascii hearts and all that, I miss you even though we hung out like 3 times when you were back. |
| 22nd September 2009 Andi | - From: Reflections on my Dong Holy crap your in Korea. Thanks for having a life worth blogging about. I can't even imagine what this little or big adventure will bring. Keep the post coming. That toilet scares me a lot. |
| 20th September 2009 Dad | I told you so! - From: Reflections on my Dong I told you to go to Argentina. We are glad to finally be able to read your blog. I will be curious if you still like rice after one year over there. love u dad |
| 7th September 2009 Terri | - From: Reflections on my Dong Your Dong looks old! Good luck with that squating over the toliet thing, that looks pretty interesting. I'm glad u have such good humor. U keep me entertained. The razorbacks r off to a good start this yr! |
| 4th September 2009 amber | I'm crying - From: Reflections on my Dong it started when I pictured you dodging traffic, smiling like a retard and has only gotten worse with the fire escape photos. The worst part is when I try to wipe the tears away I too feel like I'm making a mockery of their sad, squinty little eyes. |
| 2nd September 2009 Jeni | Kids - From: Reflections on my Dong I think if they get rid of the bowing and embrace the shaking of hands while meeting, it would discourage the whole finger in the butt hole thing. |
| 2nd September 2009 mark | watch for falling americans... - From: Reflections on my Dong I bet i would make it two stories before either the rope broke, the anchor came out, or the buidling came came down on top of me. Who am I kidding, I doubt the rope would even slow me down once i left the window. |
| 4th February 2009 Mom | Hilarious, if I may borrow a phrase - From: I never said I DON'T have syphilis So now I add you to the the list (of myself, Anne and Vanessa) of folks who actually discuss grammar. Who wudda thunk when I have you "Grammar for Dummies" and the Diane Hacker style book? Much love, Mom |
| 4th February 2009 Jeni | Don't kid yourself, Joel - From: I never said I DON'T have syphilis It was the Cuban tuxedo that got you into the wedding pics. It's power will kick Superman’s cape's ass. That sentence sounds funny, but i'm just going to go with it. |
| 8th January 2009 David | - From: Happy New Anus* Happy new year. Lookinig foreward to more wittiness from south of the Tropic of Cancer in 2009. |
| 8th January 2009 Mrs. EW | Be kinder.... - From: Happy New Anus* While I'm strangely honored to have uttered quote of the year, I think for 2009 I'll work on my sensitivity to those with mental disabilities. |
| 9th December 2008 Sturph | - From: Rolling and Cornholing in the Mad Country Did you make up that translation for cornhole? Also... where did you go bowling?! |
| 8th December 2008 Jeni | For real... - From: Rolling and Cornholing in the Mad Country You see the strangest crap ever. On a totally random note, Im trying to talk dad calling a faking a kidnapping into Donna when we get down there. I need some spending cash. |
| 26th November 2008 Natalie | - From: Trapped in Paradise with Mama Ruth Joel are you sure you're turning 24? Because you don't seem to be keeping up with technology very well for a youth. I don't know who did it first but if you would like to chat with shane and I on our cell phones from your cell phone at the same time we could definitely make that happen. Consider this news my birthday present to you, whether it's sprint or verizon who has won your heart I hope it's a very fulfilling relationship! |
| 26th November 2008 PFunk | so someone got murdered next door. - From: Trapped in Paradise with Mama Ruth I'm hoping that the winds of change blow my way. Such as, old major shopping districts being destroyed, murders, and foreclosures in your homes half mile vacinity makes your property values go up. So I went to the movies and when I came out this jackass had parked purposly too close to my car and dinged the hell outta the door. I tried to get in without incident but something just pulled me out to begin spitting on their doorhandles and windows. My wife, a touch distrubed became more so when I explained how much restraint I had shown by not stabbing throught their door with my keys and breaking their windows. She, like Joel back in the day, now sleeps with a knife. There's a group of people posting their memories and pictures of Bannister Mall. I think I'll add in pictures of the dumpsters where we would get books to burn like nazi's. Anywho...I hope your knees and hips and all other joints give you the same present mine gave me...pain...and barrels of it. |
| 26th November 2008 stephie g | - From: Trapped in Paradise with Mama Ruth Oh Joel... you're a gem. You're the youngest and oldest 24 year old I know. |
| 7th November 2008 Jeni | 37 freaking % at the Zombie Quiz - From: Plight of the Living Dead I apparently would one of the first idiots in the movie to get bitten and you would have to shoot me in the face. I can see by your score, that you would have no problem with that. Gee.. Thanks bro. |
| 8th October 2008 Christine | - From: Going Commando in a Tuxedo Duuude! Baaabe! I know you miss me.....and Johnny! Ha! Ha! Glad you made it back safely. It was great to see you. Are you heading home again before you go to China or Korea? Where was that again? Luv you! Pook |
| 6th October 2008 PFunk | Viva Las Vegas - From: Going Commando in a Tuxedo So recently I was in good ol holsome las vegas. I was propositioned by not one but two hookers. One was at 7am. Ya know what's weird. Being in a hotel room, by yourself, with mirrors on the headboard wall, side wall, and ceiling. You kinda get to see what you would look like if they found you od'd in the hotel room. I can't really say that I'd look any better than Chris Farley. Saw this guy trying to get his passed out girl off the escalator before she got her hair caught in the teeth and made for a really awful time. Am I a bad person for taking pictures of that struggle? I can't tell becuase there were literally like 5 other people around me taking pictures at the same time. We went into downtown Las Vegas. Took two steps out of the car and saw some guy passed out on the sidewalk with an empty bottle by him. How cliche, be original at least jack ass. Now this guy wasn't a tourist, he was a local that this must happen to alot. Saw a philopino family band covering tons of songs dead on. The uncle reminded me of the bear at Showbiz Pizza from back in the day. Only his mouth moved. While getting onto the plane in KC they told me that I couldn't take the Rockstar drink with me but allowed me to bring a 4" metal screw on board even after I asked the security guy if he wanted to take it. Thank god our city planners have been such huge jackasses over the last forever and there's nothing of value to destroy. |
| 3rd October 2008 jeni | P.S. - From: Going Commando in a Tuxedo Try out the new Kings of Leon album. it's the jam. |
| 3rd October 2008 Jeni | Samantha - From: Going Commando in a Tuxedo does not have crazy hair.. She just doen't have enough of it to do much else but sit there. P.S. the McCain of old is gone.. I love Biden... Palin is a moron and i have no idea what Obama stands for other then "change" which should be kind of a given. I'm writing in Ron Paul... Ron Paul in 08 |
| 16th September 2008 tenesseewillie | butternuts - From: All of My Heroes are Table Tennis Players I bet that brazilian guy is really enjoying his mp3 player that you left with me to mail to him. Oh wait he never got it. |
| 10th September 2008 Jeni | customs - From: All of My Heroes are Table Tennis Players You three look like the stereo typical drug lord from every columbia drug movie. Might not want to wear that through customs unless you're in the mood to be violated. I'm not judging... just warning. I googled the divorce thing, and I beleive that you can file it and they try and serve the other person with papers.. and they can contest it within a specific time frame, and if they can't be found, i think that the time frame is longer. I also foudn that an atty will change 1500 everytime they have to go to court. I'm totally in the wrong field. |
| 10th September 2008 Supafly Scotty | - From: All of My Heroes are Table Tennis Players I think you should take donations from all and buy up a shit ton of linen suits and pass them out at the wedding. Not only would it be an effective hijacking of the wedding, but it might be the best dressed North American wedding ever. P.S. I'm not pitching in because I'm cheap and I'll just bring my own. |
| 10th September 2008 PFunk | the gathering - From: All of My Heroes are Table Tennis Players so I feel like a different man now. I have grown up amongst the great unwashed in GA at Royals stadium and have now sat in the glory of the crown seats. My ass sweat has now definitly mingled with the ass sweat of my betters. Joel lemme know when to pick you up. |
| 29th August 2008 Erin | Mean, just mean. - From: Retards Run in Small Circles. Who are these people you hang around with that are so insensitive to the disabled?? |
| 25th August 2008 Jeni | I'm jealous - From: Retards Run in Small Circles. I can't wait to get down there. Dad and i are talking about late winter or early spring. |
| 25th August 2008 PFunk | the fat, my god the fat - From: Retards Run in Small Circles. That picture of ol' scotty with the wine really puts it into perspective. It seems his fat is much like a ninja deceptive and unnoticed until it is suffocating you. You should make note and tell his wife/wife to be to be wary in bed. Spousal death by fat has risen significantly here in the states ever since McDonalds introduced their new Fried Filet of Solent Green. It's delicious! Yet something not right here....About a week after Bob's wedding I'm headed to Las Vegas so any bets on the Chiefs or any money you just wanna hand over to a good cause, just send it my way. |
| 6th August 2008 Jeni | Way to go joel - From: Engagements, Punching Llamas, and Wonders of the World Way to punch a gay Llama right infront of his old man owner. You need to be more aware of the rainbow ascot. It might come across as a hate crime. |
| 6th August 2008 Pfunk | halla - From: Engagements, Punching Llamas, and Wonders of the World Sweet moves with them kicks to the lamas. Scott and Adam however, well lemme just say this, I taught this one guy named Corky...I'll leave it there. Saw the new Batman movie. I heart it. Saw the Royals beat down the dirty White Sox. I heart that even more. There needs to be more bitter violence on our team. We sucked at hockey yet were still a crowd pleaser since we fought so much. If you're losing you should be a'fightin. That's what my Grandma tells me anyways. I heart the Chiefs, I heart the Royals, and am willing to sing drunken songs about them and get into fights for them all soccery like. |
| 8th July 2008 mark | stupid hostages and PFunk in a dress - From: Cool, unlying life will rush in, as will little thieving Ecuadoran children I told your creditors to stop calling me because you were taken hostage in Colombia. Not even two days after the Army's 'surprise victory' i get a call asking if you are back and how to get a hold of you. On top of that, my co-worker's 9 year old spanked Pfunk in MarioKart Wii. Shameful days in KC. |
| 1st July 2008 Jeni | hoping.. just hoping - From: Cool, unlying life will rush in, as will little thieving Ecuadoran children I can't say that i have ever really wanted to jump around on top of a volcano.. but it's official. I really want to jump around on top of a volcano |
| 1st July 2008 Pfunk | awesomeness comes at no charge - From: Cool, unlying life will rush in, as will little thieving Ecuadoran children All of these places sound a little made up. Quito? Ecuador? I am very well versed in the star wars/star trek universe my friend and it sounds like you're just pulling names from those books. What do I believe? I think you're living in the abandoned husk of Bannister Mall. Speaking of which, remember that time we crawled around in the sewers there for hours looking for a way in? Most would be lookin to get at cash registers. We were goin for B&D Booksellers. My little neice is so cute. I don't think her other set of grandparents appreciated the humor of me and my parents posing her asleep/passed out laying on the arm of a chair with a half empty bottle of jack cradled in her chubby little arms. Anywho, keep photoshoppin those pictures from your made up places and I'm gonna leave some blankets for you in the old Bennigans that closed down to become a strip joint that closed down due to lack of even semi attractive women or men that would pay to see them. I think that's a new level of urban blight called blightilogy. |
| 23rd June 2008 Andi | take me home or loose me forever - From: A ship in a harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for. negative ghost rider the pattern in full. I'm very impressed that you not only referenced the fly by in your blog but also gave a shout out to Mr. Skerrit. Bork sounds like a sexual reference. |
| 17th June 2008 Jeni | WOW - From: A ship in a harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for. I love boat captains names Jesus. I would think that it would me feel a little more safe. Also, Star Wars Lego is about the coolest game ever. I have hijacked Mark's X-Box and refuse to give it back. |
| 17th June 2008 carly | haven't even read your post yet - From: A ship in a harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for. i don't have time right now, and i think i'll have colin read it out loud to me later. but i just wanted to say that those boats better be at our disposal when we come to visit. |
| 17th June 2008 Pfunk | Bob's wedding. - From: A ship in a harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for. Wether he knows it or not, Bob has hired me to sing at his wedding. I'm gonna do a wicked rendition of N.W.A.'s 100 miles and runnin. I call pickin Joel up from the Airport. "You are so awesome...and attractive, thank you for saving us! What do we owe you?" "There is no charge for awesomness or attractiveness" |
| 17th June 2008 Pfunk | kids say the darndest things - From: A ship in a harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for. So here I am in the good old midwest, which according to the mormons is where good ol Joe and Mary lived back in biblical times. Silly old testament. It's been unbearably hot only a couple of times. In my karate summer camp one 10 year old told a 4 year old he was gonna "freakin kill you". Good times. Tomorrow me and the Mrs. are gonna get down with a bottle of Tennessee Jack, drop the little rugrats into a bit with a wild grizzley bear, a knife, and ladder that only one man can use. 10 children enter, maybe one leaves. Darwin would be proud I think. I find myself thinking more about the ol hockey days recently. I heart hockey. I told my wife that if I saw red helmet fuck walking an old lady across the street, I'd run him and the old lady down. She was mildly distrubed(read-restraining order and living at her mother's). If you haven't seen Kung Fu Panda, please do. Much like Muppet's in Space, I will go see this in a theater by myself. I am currently creating my own "self defense moves" for my 4th degree black belt. Like Al, I fully expect you all to refer to me by my official title at that time. Master McDaniel. You could use Master Kenobi if you like. My moves I like to view a little bit more like assualt rather than defense. I plan on testing them out at the next star trek convention. I'm planning on naming one "Joel of Doom". It's like I get 45 of my very own fatality moves. Lemme know if you want anything more than a swift kick to the ribs and name calling in "Joel of Doom". I heart Joel and everyone that hearts him as well. I also heart WAM, just though that would be a good one to let you know 10 years after we were roomies. |
| 2nd June 2008 Jeni | Dude Crush - From: This isn't Nam, this is bowling. There are rules I'm glad that you and Scott can comfortably embrace non-homosexual dude lovin. |
| 2nd June 2008 PFunk | I read them story books too - From: This isn't Nam, this is bowling. There are rules I just got done with a book that'll blow your mind man. Star Wars: Legacy of the Force: Invincible. It is the epic conclusion to this particular story arc (nerdy comic book term). I had a Star Wars boner from cover to cover. This comment is meant as both description of the novel and the length of what God gave me. I seem to have gotten this eye infection which precludes me to driving in sunlight. I also feel incredibly hungry for human blood. Our Kickboxing fights went swimmingly last friday night. 6 fights on the card and we won 5 of them! Let the world know....don't fuck with this part of Johnson County. Where my 913 dawgs at. Remember that time that Josh Vaughn set your brother on fire? Remember that time that Greg Hawkins shot a bottle rocket up Scott's pants. Equally awesome times. Well look forward to the next Star Wars novel out in December. It will follow the exploits of Han and Leia and their adopted daughter on a family vacation to find the place where the Millenium Falcon was built. |
| 22nd April 2008 rachel | goat fields - From: If the Heat Doesn't KIll the Elderly I Will why are there so many random goat fields in south america? i stumbled upon one in argentina one time, but the goats were walking through sand dunes. and there was a truck of sketchy-looking dudes who appeared to be negotiating in the middle of the sand dunes which were in the middle of nowhere, so i took off like oj simpson before i ended up kidnapped. |
| 21st April 2008 Kat | Lulo...yum - From: If the Heat Doesn't KIll the Elderly I Will Can you send me some lulo seeds? I'd like to try them in the garden. |
| 12th April 2008 Ty | Brown Chicken Brown Cow - From: My Eyes are Just a Little Sweaty Today Hey Tyrone, nice to see a blog entry this lunar cycle. Always hilariously entertaining, despite the liberal drivel. Por ejemplo: (For those of you who don't habla espanol, that means, "For ejemplo") The Charleston Heston comments sounded more like they came from Rosie Odonell, but male..... and less fat..... and repulsive. Outlawing guns leads to armed criminals roaming around with the absence of the fear of pesky law abiding citizens to retaliate. However, I don't disagree with everything on your entry: For ejemplo: " Someone recently asked me if I could only eat one type of nut for the rest of my life what would it be and to be totally honest I’m not comfortable answering that question." I totally agree with not answering that question. Almonds.....damn it...you tricked me in to saying that. |
| 12th April 2008 Smellin Coffee | ouch - From: My Eyes are Just a Little Sweaty Today I got the "no one visits me" bit. I don't even have a passport! Much less a couple thousand dollars. You were already here in Kansas and didn't even bother to visit the litter. several years in a row. Yeeeeaarrrrss! I like Charlton. Way to over-simplify his (and my) point of view. Between 3 colleges and life as a world changer in Columbia the ol' Doc has become quite a flaming liberal. : ) 2nd Ammendment Mr . Gore! That's why you lost to W. Shane, I'd let him keep the Hat. Don't know where that thing has been. Love those puppies. I just wanna squish em. |
| 10th April 2008 shane | hat - From: My Eyes are Just a Little Sweaty Today I couldnt help to notice you wearing my hat in the boat picture. |
| 9th April 2008 Jeni | Dad is going to be super happy - From: My Eyes are Just a Little Sweaty Today I just taught sam the KU chant. I'm trying to get her to start it with "hey Grandpa" I think he might tear up a little... or just hit her in the face with another tennis ball. His new nickname is John McEnroe. |
| 8th April 2008 Heavy equipment editor | editing prowess - From: My Eyes are Just a Little Sweaty Today A blog shout out? Fantastico. A "whom" would be good, but that sounds a little stuffy. Just caps the "do" and close the quote. And add some hyphens. A colon could work instead of the comma; I'd have to look it up. Really, it's fine. This is why I make the huge bucks. I also had a 6-year-old whom I was poking in the back turn around and ask me straight-faced, “Do you LIKE trouble?" Tough kid, by the way. I like his style. |
| 7th April 2008 Jeni | My you tube beats your youtube. - From: My Eyes are Just a Little Sweaty Today although.. the way the dude on your video says really.. is a slice of awesome, this is still better. WHEN they win tonight, I'm headed to mass.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlaUuwWdpJE |
| 7th April 2008 Pfunk | endangered species - From: My Eyes are Just a Little Sweaty Today Question to all you college nerds, has anyone ever done a study on body mass versus poop amount in mini-schnauzers? My cute little puppy keeps pooping in the house, apparently she does not enjoy her dainty whoha doing it's business outdoors which I fully understand, but everytime she goes indoors we throw it in the toilet. Well she has clogged the toilet. And I don't mean clogged like when Josh Vaughn gets into the chocolate has to sit there for 4 hours tryin to pass a 10 pounds of easter candy, but more like clogged in the old testament biblical sense as in society may crumble becuase of this. Good to see ol' Trav in a pic. Looks like he got into the chocolate a couple of times himself. I love the Office. I'm thinking of hiring someone just like Dwight. I'll be accepting applications even from those of you abroad. One of Michelle's psychotic criminal students in Raytown told her that he didn't need to go to school anymore because he is going to be a pornstar when he grows up. All I wanted was to run a karate school and look where I am. "I got hot love on a hot love freeway" -The Office UK Love, hugs, kisses PFUNK |
| 4th March 2008 Pfunk | Girl, your still my girl, girl - From: Come Along to Awesometown. What was funnier, the 0 degrees Celsius skit on SNL or Tyson driving around with a mouth full of chewin tobacy rockin out to 98 Degrees. He's so gay. Keeps tryin to prove he ain't a gay by makin babies, but his "Broadway in Prison" debut of "CATS" shows otherwise. He did raise alot of money for local charities but the cat costumes worn by the inmates he oversees were really kittens that the inmates had to wear over their genitals. Again, Tyson is gay. I actually know what and how to do the "Alabama Crab Dangle". All those years of some people looking offended and others looking interested I now know what it was about. I love Joel, and if that makes me gay...well....then fuck Joel he sucks. Love and Hugs PFUNK |
| 4th March 2008 G | - From: Come Along to Awesometown. Have you seen the Jenny video by Flight of the Conchords? AWESOME! It makes me laugh/cry uncontrollably. |
| 2nd February 2008 willie | locked door - From: The Last Time I Saw You, You Were On Stage. if i had a dollar for everytime you did the #2 in a dirty bar bathroom, well i would have about 11 dollars! And stop humping the Handley's Slender Mouse Opossum(Marmosops handleyi) i hear they are really endangered! |
| 1st February 2008 PFUNK | - From: The Last Time I Saw You, You Were On Stage. Remember that time we drove from Smithville to KC with me in the back of Garcia's truck? Ya that's how cold it is in my school in the morning time. It's kind of like walking into a dead fishes butt. Without the smell. I could get the smell effect by walking into the Korean grocery store across the street though. Where did the term "cold as a witches tit" come from? I have found in my many years of bedding down many, many women that most of their bodies are cold. Sometimes I come home to find Michelle laying on a giant "hotrock" in the middle of our living room. I think the Harry Potter book was very good. A better book for all of dorkdom is the newest Star Wars book. Jacen Solo you kooky kid. Stop tryin to take over the galaxy like your grand papa. Last night I had a dream where I was choking an apparently was displaying the actual physical motions of choking in the real world. Rather than shaking me awake to save me, my wife simply shook the bed and told me that I was being too loud. Good times. In Overland Park we are actually celebrating our own Carnivale. Pretty much I'm gonna get drunk, where a pink hat and streak down town OP until I get arrested. I think this year I'll grease myself up though. Got some Emerald Skye on CD now. I think I can send MP3's over email. Peace and love, PFUNK PS Goal #1 get out of credit card debt Goal #2 Go to Zimbobway and visit Joel |
| 31st December 2007 T | - From: I lost my lucky ball and chain I miss your crazy soulful self. |
| 4th November 2007 gloria marce | An English Quirk - From: Tricky Tricky Halloween! Though the english language is extremely accurate, we can notice how for some couples sometimes is hard to express their feelings without blowing what they have. In spanish there are two different words to express love, one of them more serious then the other. When we say "te amo" the correct translation would be "I love You", which is a serious thing to say. But when we want to express what we feel without scaring our couple away or going to a dead-end alley we juat say "te quiero". The literal translation would be "Iwant you", which would end up being something weird, or kinky, to say. It's more like showing your infatuation, more or less. |
| 17th October 2007 Alisha | Amazing - From: Paint a Picture of the Days Gone By You had me at Derrick.... |
| 5th October 2007 markybear | fiber...life's high-octane fuel - From: Paint a Picture of the Days Gone By I'm sure in 1822, the diet realy worked. After a box of graham crackers and a big bowl of grape nuts, the only thing I'd want is an outhouse and a large book with nice, soft pages. |
| 5th October 2007 al | Alcatraz, not that bad. - From: Paint a Picture of the Days Gone By As for swimming from Alcatraz to San Fran., each year about 3000 people take the 1.25 mile swim just for the hell of it. The water might be cold, but it keeps the man-eating sharks away. |
| 17th September 2007 Chris | Colombian Taxi - From: I’d be more worried about coyotes if I were you! Wicked good taxi photo. |
| 28th August 2007 PFUNK | foriegn calls - From: Oh Stewardess, I Speak Jive I think i got a phone call from the taxi driver that lifted your phone, unfortunatly since all they speak down there in Nigeria is whistles and clicks I couldn't make out a damn thing. Most disgusting place I've ever been in......either my Grandma McD's house (this is a person who chose to wear wigs not from lack of hair but from lack of want to clean her naturally God givin hair) or the dirty ass Korean market across from my school. Upon walking in it reminds one of what it may be like to walk into a butthole. Upon further introspection one realizes that it would be more like what it is to walk into a fishes butt hole. I think my hatred for whitey is growing by the day. I'm considering doin one of two things maybe both..... 1. REALLY gettin serious about becoming an alchoholic and/or 2. starting my own legion of child killers, not adults that kill children but children that can kill with anything from a shoestring to a F-17 Tomcat. |
| 26th June 2007 chelita | reading narnia - From: A song of myself i realy like the story , i have all the books in english ,portuguese and spanish. it would be awesome to get into a mythological world. ..have fun.... |
| 24th June 2007 samaria | talking about people from santa marta - From: A song of myself i wash my hair almost every day,i like different kinds of cereals and i call them by their name.and gringos should wear nice shoes. ladies from santa marta wear nice outfit. enjoy your vacation |
| 23rd May 2007 Kat | weather report - From: Dry land is not a myth; I've seen it. I remember . . . oh how I remember. |
| 23rd May 2007 Jeni | awesome - From: Dry land is not a myth; I've seen it. Don't think that I won't be using "This party´s to the dick" every chance i get... and i might throw it in even when it does't belong there to make people think i have tourettes. P.S. I clean my windows like that, but i prefer to have sam in a backpack on my shoulders. I'm trying to break her of her fear of heights. We're making progess everyday. |
| 2nd May 2007 David | Spelling Bee??? - From: If I Bring a Little Music I Can Fit Right In. So what do they actually call a spelling bee in Colombia? Also, is this really a difficult contest since each vowel in Spanish only has one sound? Or are they attempting to brave the perilous shwas of English spelling? I suggest demanding a bowl of brown M&M's in your classroom for the next contract period. |
| 2nd May 2007 Pfunk | lamp shade - From: If I Bring a Little Music I Can Fit Right In. My dog recently got fixed, cause mainly we see that little whoreish glint in her eyes and we don't want any puppies runnin around on welfare and stuff. So since she had the surgery, she has to run around with this cone/lampshade on her head so she can't get to the stitches. I never knew dogs could really feel shame. I mean REALLY feel shame. and it is soooo funny to see it. Funny thing about that mall shooting, before he did that he shot a cop at the gas station I frequent and was at about an hour before. South KC my kinda town! I think the new mayor is going to do some redecorating there. Replace the word "redecorating" with "napalming". In the Bannister mall parking lot they have a neat little eatery called "Golddiggers". It's seems to only do business late at night and have a largley male clientele. By the way, it used to be a Bennigans I think. Which happens to be Butters favorite place to eat. I have fell back in love with south park since I watch it on line all the time now. I'm thinking I need a Cartman in my life. Someone that will say horrible, yet funny, racist comments would be a good sidekick. I am near completion of my own Kill Bill style of female assasains. I have 5 gals getting ready to step into the ring and fight in November. So I got that goin for me, plus I'm layin the drywall down at the McDonald's in Vasquenez. Peace and love PFunk |
| 1st May 2007 Stephie G | - From: If I Bring a Little Music I Can Fit Right In. Did you just admit to liking Vallenato? I guess it's true that if you get enough of something, you will learn to like it. |
| 24th April 2007 pink mona | u didn`t like my city :((((..... - From: Everything was beautiful. Nothing hurt. well, there must be 2 reasons , either 1st, coz I wasn`t there :P, or coz you did not go to the right places. La Zona Rosa is a MUST , it`s where the people party night and day on the streets, it is absolutely fantastic!!!I used to go there during the week even, after classes, it`s always packed with people looking for a good time, if u get a chance to visit Medellin again, go there, Parque LLeras will impress you, honestly!!! Cheers!Mona. |
| 19th April 2007 Adam | - From: Everything was beautiful. Nothing hurt. I hope you'll be up for more road tripping when I get there buddy. Everything looks and sounds amazing. Who did you travel with? I must admit as well, your foto skills are impressive. The writing is shit though. HA. Just kidding...holla at me. |
| 19th April 2007 Pfunk | I rock and irocs - From: Everything was beautiful. Nothing hurt. So I recently either became way cooler and tougher or way more gay and gay. I just go done doin my first body building contsest and took a semi respectable 5th place. Semi respectable is what I say because one of the judges said he had a semi watchin me. If you think you were cool in your little speedo on the beach, you ain't got shit on me brotha. I was wearin a bandaid straped to a contact lens to cover my junk. Sadly and luckily, it was more than sufficient. I'll send a pic on your other email so you can tape my picture to whatever hot latino chick your doin. In a month I start my 4th degree black belt material. I get to make up 45 moves of my own. I'm seriously considering calling one of them "The Joel". It will consist of some serious eye gouging after shaking their hand under a flag of friendship and truce, getting to a safe distance and calling them names. It's so much fun not living in that hotel anymore with all those interesting strangers that came and went. By the preceeding comment replace "Hotel" with "mother-in-laws house" and replace "interesting strangers" with "14 year old girls". Michelle has managed to spend more money on the dogs clothing then ours in the last 6 months. Which is cool with me since I don't really want a pink hoodie with bunnies face on it. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was awesome. I had a huge karate boner the whole time. I can't wait until the Transformers and the Simpsons movies. Go Matt Go Peace and love my brotha PFUNK |
| 19th April 2007 Elizabeth | - From: Everything was beautiful. Nothing hurt. I am not sure what I enjoy more....your writing or your photography! Your skills were vastly under-utilized at the ol' PA office. I so enjoy hearing of your travels..........sounds marvelous! |
| 19th April 2007 Stephanie | - From: Everything was beautiful. Nothing hurt. Did you get a new shirt??? OH wait... |
| 10th April 2007 David | $8.00 will take you a long way in a taxi... - From: All The Useless Things My Hands Have Done. Hmmm...If I were calling the game I'd say something like "...del cinturón de pobreza!" In my gringo mind it seems like this would cover all of the necesssary entendres: equate the distance of the shooter from the rim with the distance to the outskirts of town, and possibly, if the scoring team were down, note their relative poverty on the scoreboard relative to the defending team. Why not bring a little class struggle into the whole thing? |
| 28th March 2007 Big Al | ..one step ahead - From: All The Useless Things My Hands Have Done. The big wigs in hollywood are way ahead of you. I actually saw "The Labyrinth" about two months ago, it's a great movie. I even suggested you go see it. It even won a couple academy awards. KU is out of the tourney, by the way. Damn third world blogs, always behind. |
| 28th March 2007 Stephie G | - From: All The Useless Things My Hands Have Done. That's the best combo I've seen since the free beer with the quart of rum (even though I'm sure the tuna is worth more than the soda whereas the beer was only about 30 cents)! |
| 5th March 2007 Stephie G | Butt crack - From: Carnaval: Git it on ‘till the early mooorn I wish I could spray espuma in someone's crack right now... that was a good time. I'm surprised no one has ever done that to me considering how many of my outfits feature the BC (Maha's new nickname for me from DC). |
| 14th December 2006 Ballsecki | Peeing - From: All of the Drunks dressed up like Santa Claus "I find it difficult to enjoy the present and not live for a better future when I really have to pee." Speaking the truth here Joel, I must say. Say hi to the Eugsters, Casper specifically, and Piero too I guess. btw, write me back you when/if you speak with boss woman about Adam jobby job. P.S. Don't let that 11 year old girl bring you down. You have talent. I say talent! |
| 2nd December 2006 pink mona | LA MULTI ANI!!! - From: Gentlemen, what we have here is a terrifying example of the reindeer effect. LA MULTI ANI!!! Wish I had been there for your birthday. I am heading to Bogota on the 15th of December , maybe we`ll meet up there! |
| 29th November 2006 shane | ive seen - From: Gentlemen, what we have here is a terrifying example of the reindeer effect. ive seen your hair line and trust me its running from your forehead kinda like mine. and also youre almost thirty! Scott said youre an old bastard! Heres to oversized heads, lisps and having three balls! oh scott and I are kinda drunk. gaybo! |
| 21st November 2006 pink mona | - From: We shed what was left of our summer skin. great to see you enjoy it back in Santa Marta, this Bermuda Triangle where things such as responsibility , common sense and reliability disappear and are forever gone! I know I wasn`t able to make it, but I guess you just have to ignore what you can`t stand and struggle to survive like Robinson on his little island. Colombian people on the coast are great to party with, but the rest of the time you just need your own Friday not to go insane. I guess the company of a cat will many times do ! Having a beer talking to her is probably more relaxing than listening to costeños rattle on about God knows what nonsense which you don`t get nor give a shit about. I guess I didn`t have a cat to keep me from going insane, that`s why I left. Love your entries! Miss you like hell. I know your birthday is in November, but don`t know exactly the date, so HAPPY BIRTHDAY, hugs and kisses! |
| 21st November 2006 willie | - From: We shed what was left of our summer skin. if hotdogs are wrong, then i dont want to be right. |
| 6th November 2006 PFunk | I heart Chiefs - From: If destiny’s kind, I’ve got the rest of my mind. Well big news is good gnews with gary gnu. The old truck is gone. Yes, after driving it for 6 years with no AC, working windshield wipers, gas gauge, or pride, it is finally gone. I took the spirit of the truck, (known as "Slick Willy"; side note-I named it after ol President Clinton but always knew I had heard the name elsewheres, turns out it was my grandpas nickname back in the Korean war) and transfered it to a kick ass-business bought- 2007 rav4. Now what am I doin with a family style car like that you say? Well a little PFunk may be on the way. However we have sadly ran into some problems, such as no heartbeat yet, but we are keeping our hopes up and would appreciate a little love and hope or prayer ( whatever you feel appropriate-do a voodoo dance if it's yo thang). Any who I'm gonna go back and keep rockin the free world and you keep rockin in the not as free back ass world of good fruit. Love Pfunk |
| 28th September 2006 PFUNK | watch me work now - From: Fluent in JavaScript as well as Klingon I am Spartacus. Joel, I feel that the gross attack on Josh Linn's character was a horrific injustice. Remember it was me that inadvertently destroyed his computer, aka 100 gig porn love house. In five days I become totally responsible for all the bills in the business. Today my phone service kicked in and I saw for the first time a beautiful thing. Caller ID, on my new phone. I talked with ol' Garcia today. He's doin somethin silly like electrician. Don't he know that them Mexicans is only good at roofin and tile'n? I think I'm gonna go to sleep now. And I mean the kick ass kind of sleep where you wake up a millionaire riding in a spaceship made of love and chocolate chips. peace brotha man PFUNK |
| 23rd September 2006 Capnt. Caveman | a penpal - From: It must be regarded in its essence, as fact. This is fun, it'll be just like grade school where we got pen pals. Except they were in prison and when they wrote back gave horrificly graphic descriptions of their crimes. My pen pal, Slasher-X, like to hang people in old oak trees using sheep entrails. Ahh, kindergarten. Lata wittle joey. PFunk |
