Thank God For Sex Hotels

This morning (or should I say last night?) I awoke at 4:00 am to the sound of somebody chopping. The host's wife was already awake (it was still pitch dark) chopping vegetables. Wow that's early. I went back to sleep, and Ryan and I woke up at 6:30, ready to get back on the road. Our host tried to convince us to at least join him for coffee, but we knew if we didn't right then we wouldn't ever get away, so we headed off. He charged us 200,000 dong for the tire replacement (about $13), and we tipped him 100,000 dong for the overnight and ricewine, which he tried to refuse.

A few kilometers later we stopped for some iced coffee - good stuff. Iced coffee with condensed milk seems to be universally good in Vietnam, and it's dirt cheap. It was 75 cents total for two coffees.

We then drove to the town we had planned to spend the night in. I pictured a quaint little town on the beach....but the town wasn't anywhere near the beach. I guess our map of the entirety of Vietnam isn't detailed enough to show when a town is directly on the water, and when it's several kilometers away. We grabbed a breakfast of fried egg with white rice and barbecued mystery meat (that seems to be the staple), and headed off to Moi Ne, where we planned to spend the night tonight.

Nothing really exciting happened on the ride to Moi Ne. I expected a scenic ride along the coast, but only sections of the road went along the coast. When we were near the ocean, however, stands selling coral lined the street. Hmmmm, I'm sure that coral was sustainably harvested.

About 120 kilometers outside of Moi Ne, Ryan felt his bike become less balanced, and we discovered the back axle had not been tightened sufficiently, causing the back wheel to wiggle a little bit. Greattttt. We also discovered a hole in my back tire - but the tube was unaffected. We decided to drive 30 kmh the rest of the way to Moi Ne - a painfully long and slow ride...and painful on the butt.

I had imagined Moi Ne a cute resort town with gorgeous white sand beaches and clear blue water - a great spot to spend an afternoon and a night. In reality it really wasn't very attractive. Hideous resorts lined the beach, which was so eroded that there was little sand left. The town didn't consist of anything really, except for a motorbike shop (a given) and an internet cafe. I got my back tire replaced for $6, and Ryan got his back axle tightened. In the mean time we checked our e-mail, and I learned that I was elected president of my fraternity for the summer. What? I didn't even know I was running for president!

Our disappointment with Moi Ne was so great that we decided not to spend the night, and instead keep traveling until it was either too dark or we were too tired.

Again, nothing interesting happened until we arrived in a little town about 80 kilometers outside of Saigon. By this point it was dark, and we were ready to get in some sleep, so we decided to ask around for a guesthouse. We found a couple our age on a motorbike, and they were kind enough to take us to what appeared to be the only guesthouse in the town - and out in the boonies.

This place was literally in the middle of nowhere - a 5 minute motorbike ride outside of town, and up a dirt road. It seemed a little odd to me that a guesthouse should be located in such a random spot, but it all made sense when I saw the room: purple walls - the signature color scheme of a sex motel. Well, at least it was clean, and I was tired. Ryan and I stashed our bags in our rooms and biked back into town to grab a dinner of street food. Then it was back to the sex motel. I immediately went to bed, but Ryan stayed up to hit on a cute Vietnamese girl that was the owner's daughter. She was married though. Bummer. The owner liked Ryan though, a lot, and offered herself to him that night. He politely declined. Haha.

Oh, I forgot to mention that last night, when sleeping in the locals' house, Ryan awoke in the middle of the night to a cockroach in the center of the cot. It didn't phase me...but I also didn't wake up. I guess that's normal when you live in a little bungalow that's open to nature.

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