Hue and Hoi An-dodging typhoons and wearing couture

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And down south we go...

After leaving Halong Bay bang on time to avoid Typhoon Lekima we had a night bus journey ahead of us to reach Hue, the ancient imperial capital of Vietnam. Having been deeply traumatised by the Chinese sleeper bus experience and beds that could only fit Chinese people and contortionists we were quite happy to be on a regular seat aircon coach. The 16 hour journey wasn't too bad, or perhaps we're just hardcore slummers at this point. Hard to tell. We had barely begun to descend the steps out of the bus when the touts arrived en masse like locusts. We were too tired to put up a fight and allowed ourselves to be led down an alley to a rather non-descript looking hotel. We weren't expecting much, but we managed to hit the jackpot. Spacious double room with aircon, fridge, ensuite satellite tv..and get this a PC with free internet. All for 8$!! I hope you're all wild with jealousy. Mind you the fridge didn't work. And the PC was pure nostalgia gold-14 inch beige screen, practically an antique.

We decided to spend only 2 nights in Hue. Halong Bay gave us a taste for the beach and we have lost the culture vulture instinct. We spent the first day in Hue exploring the ancient citadel which was quite nice. A more realistic version of Beijing's forbidden city. There was certainly a strong Chinese influence, not surprising since they ruled the place for the best part of a millenium. The second day we ventured into the non touristy parts of town, the house boat suburbs. That was a fascinating experience. We were followed by children shouting HELLOHELLOHELLOHELLO and laughing at how clever they were (and no doubt how strange we looked). We were barked at by some very unfriendly dogs. Overall Vietnamese dogs are not the friendliest, but I suppose it doesn't pay for them to form attachments..

HOI AN

Here is where we started to realise why An Phu Open Bus Tour Company only charge 25$ for 1600KM. Hoi An is approx 120KM from Hue. Want to know how long the bus journey takes? 5 hours! 5 fecking hours. The bus stops randomly for 15 minute periods, it alternates between driving 30KM an hour and 100KM. I was actually happier with the 30KM mode as it was the king of all rattletraps and it's reflexes were shot to hell. We had the obligatory stop at a overpriced beach resort so the company could earn their kickback for the overpriced coke we bought. Wonderful. However our mood lifted once we reached Hoi An. We were dropped off at the An Phu hotel-Quelle Surprise! But it was just fab, a real hotel with 3 whole stars and get this... a swimming pool!! We took the cheapest room in the house for 10$ and were very pleased with ourselves!

Hoi An is just one of the most beautiful places we have ever visited. Like Halong Bay it is a WHO site, and it is impeccably preserved to keep the old flair, style and history. The town is probably most famous for it's tailor shops, over 400 of them. You can get anything under the sun custom made for bargain prices. And how could we resist. I got a bikini, dress, top and silk trousers and the slightly more restrained Mathias got himself some new trews. They were beautifully made in less than 24 hours. We were very happy customers. As with Hue we decided on a stay of 2 nights/3 days still holding out for the big beach resorts! But we had a wonderful time here. The old town is beautiful with a row of fabulously cheap, french inspired cafes along a river front. It was here we tried the Vietnamese Dalat Wine, and yet again they took the best the French had to offer and they produce some pretty good wine for 1.50 a bottle. Draught Beer can be bought for 15cents a glass. Just what you need in scorching hot weather! The seafood here is just to divine and again cheaper than a McDonalds.

Hoi An also has a beach about 4km out of town, and on our second day Mathias and I (avec customized bikini) hired some bicycles and headed for a day of sunworship. The beach was gorgeous, not quite in white sand territory yet but it was a very pale golden colour :-). The water is a clear green colour, warm yet refreshing. The waves are very strong and we were in the company of surfers! The most entertaining aspect of the beach has to be the roving salespeople. Covered from head to toe for fear the sun may touch their skin they wander around selling everything from coffee makers to pineapples and Mentos. They approach you with a cheery "Hello Wanna buy something. It's Happy Hour" One thing we are learning is that it is always Happy Hour in Vietnam. They will never miss a chance to sell you "something...anything". But it really is so cheap here that you cannot complain.

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