Published: May 18th 2011May 18th 2011
I am sitting at my computer at work on my big red exercise ball, which has, as of recent, been deflating quicker than usual... Note to self: look into it...
Today, I have decided to work on my resume... I'm at my job until next March (I’m renewing my contract for an additional 6 months to help the students apply for university and then see graduation!~), but there is all of this buzz in the air and opportunity and it is spring, so I feel just alive and motivated. As I was searching the archives of my life (calendars, notebooks, etc) trying to find evidence as to when I did certain noteworthy endeavors, I stumbled upon this old blog... Instead of reminiscing, I decided to just jump back in today and see what comes out.
I’ve been biking more recently and think that I am finally healing more from my bike accident last year (collision with another biker that gave way to his back tire smacking me in the face and resulting in a broken nose… Of which I used gentle massage, yogic breath, and positive thinking to heal)… So anyway, I biked to the yoga studio last night and just enjoyed the sensations as they came. I will confess I did not enjoy the slightly nauseous and cold sweat sensations that came over me as I drove through the location of the accident.
The students recently have been awesome and I was put in charge of preparing students for essay exams that will soon be mandatory on some of the standardized tests the students take yearly… This has been an interesting task that I am learning so much from and it has made me appreciate our carefree conversation classes even more. In the coming weeks I am going to teach my kids how to make ice cream… Since it is a science high school, I figure a delicious science experiment will be appreciated : ) Here is the link: http://crafts.kaboose.com/ice-cream-in-a-bag.html (Thank you Jennifer!~) If you ever want to teach a lesson that the kids will go crazy for… In Korea rock salt can be a pain to find… But powdered vanilla can be bought at places like EMart and Home Plus (Thanks Nicole!~). For the rock salt you can use http://gmarket.co.kr or http://www.iherb.com (Thanks Kwon SungMi and Jessa!~)… Anyway, I’m excited about the lesson for sure…
I have decided to eventually sit down and get myself organized (perhaps post contract) and use said time to apply for the Yoga Alliance. I am qualified by their standards, but I haven't filled out the paper work and paid the decently hefty application fee/annual dues. I've been in continuous teacher training for the last 2.5 years and I am still learning so much... I sometimes think about my initial desire to go to India or a random country and take a month long course or what have you. I am astounded by how much ignorance I still possess being in the thick of things, studying and teaching daily. Papers, namely certificates/diplomas baffle me. A piece of paper is not sufficient in measuring someone’s knowledge base/experience (I say this as I mention that I am applying for the Yoga Alliance… I am a hypocrite and conformist, let it be said). I read something recently that made me feel a little belittled. That is probably why I used the language above about my actual experience verses what is valued by mainstream society, which I am stating from my current situation about myself and not about anyone else or their choices… The words above are written in an attempt to pacify my insecurities ;P But aside from that, the root of it is also written as my truth, that Ayurveda Yoga Academy (http://www.ayurvedayogasstudio.blogspot.com –or- Facebook search: “Ayurveda Yoga Academy, Daegu”) has given me an on-going opportunity to continuously grow, get hands on, and learn for over 2 and a half years. And the coolest thing is that they offer this opportunity to everyone who takes the Healing Alchemist Leadership Course.
An anecdote I once heard popped into my head a few days ago and I’ve just been milling it over:
A person can go to a monastery, shave their head, and by all means look like a monk. They can even go through the motions and talk like a monk, but still have the mind of a devil.
I read "The Great Oom" by Robert Love recently and this captivating man, with an uncanny knowledge of traditional Indian texts had never been to India. People have and had tried to discredit him for it or call him a fraud. He may have been in some ways, but it came down to the fact that he had had an amazing teacher; his passion for yoga and tantra was endless, and he was a charismatic and magnetic teacher. I talked with a friend recently who was itching to head to India and find for herself that something that she has been questing after: the, as of now, nameless desire. So many people I know, myself included have been on this mission (though it can take different forms: spiritual, academic, physical, cultural…) We are all wandering seeds looking for a place to root down, be cared for, and blossom. But yoga challenges us to stop looking out and start looking in. In my recent conversation with my friend I challenged her to look inside and see what she didn’t want to face within herself. What was the thing that made her itch to move on? The generation that I find myself in and around, we are wanderers of the Earth (physically, mentally, spiritually…) I caught myself in this same bind a couple months ago. I have been working at my job now for over 2.5 years and suddenly I was overwhelmed with this desire to leave, feel something new, and be in a different environment. But then I started asking myself why and the emotions that started surfacing were illuminating. The ideas of: not settling down, impressing other people, giving up on my pursuits that are taking longer than desired, fear of aging, loneliness, and laziness among other things started presenting themselves. It is so easy to see other people’s situations and judge them without turning the microscope onto the self… I have started doing a sort of meditation, after I talk to someone, if I gave advice, to just sit with it and watch it… Where I feel it and where I deny it. It is amazing how challenging it is to stay connected to the advice we give. I feel this sensation of setting down the information once I disseminate it and it is actually a task to keep the advice with me long enough to work with it within myself. This tangent’s purpose is to remind myself that no matter where I run across the globe, it is inside where I face everything, where reality and truth lie. No matter where I am, I will face the same demons, they are inescapable. Also, I can learn the same lessons and connect with the good and the bad anywhere. The only addendum I will make is that, even though yoga is a path walked alone, being in places where support systems exist is a beautiful cushion… Maybe a distracting and limiting cushion (I’m thinking about Osho right now!~) But as I am just at the beginning of my journey inward, I am still trapped in the physical and enjoy physical and mental comforts… I enjoy the good people who make up my Maya laced life.
Hey! Now when the meditation between dams upon me,
I will abandon the host of distracting errors,
Focus, in extreme-free experience,
Without release or controlling,
And achieve stability in the creation and perfection stages!
Giving up business, now one-pointed in meditation,
I won’t surrender to the power of erroneous addictions!
(The Root Verses of Six Betweens, pg 115) --Liberation through Understanding in the Between
The best things, in order of occurrence:
1) Laura, my bff from my first year in Korea is coming out in 2.5 weeks to hang out and visit people. I am utterly stoked. Among other things, we are going to hike Jiri Mountain (2nd highest mountain in South Korea… 1st is Hala Mountain on Jeju) with a group of kind and entertaining teachers. I can’t believe it has been over 1.5 years since Laura has been in Korea… Time has sped so fast. I’m excited to see what has changed through Laura’s eyes. I’m also looking forward to intense fits of belly laughter, which might just be our greatest past time.
2) Home!!! I’m going home for August. It will be suuuuch a refreshing trip. 3 weeks of stress free play with all of the people I love back in my family’s house… I’m looking forward to family, friends, cats, dogs, Island’s pineapple teriyaki burger, my mom and dad’s cooking, vegetarian sushi, smoothies, bike rides around the American River, and swimming…
3) My mom, the best person in the whole world, will be spending two whole weeks with me in Korea. I am just beyond words. It is going to be incredible. I am still a little in disbelief, but I have already started compiling a massive list of must dos ;P I just keep having this flash back to when my mom and I headed to San Diego to watch Cher in concert. It was just the two of us and it was so awesome. Or the times that she was with me in Long Beach and San Francisco… And Los Angeles... I just always get to thinking about how there is nothing better than spending quality time with another person, especially once who has helped in your creating. It would be wonderful to have my dad here too, but I feel like in a few years that will happen… Maybe at a place that has an epic golf course… HAHA… That would be fun ; )
4) And last, but certainly not least, my bff Jenny will be living right next to me (literally) for 6 MONTHS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ummm, can you tell I’m excited?! Ummm, yes. So this is like the craziest, coolest situation I could imagine. Just sayin. I feel so lucky to have such a great soul coming to play in such an interesting and dynamic space… Ah, shenanigans.
And with that unnecessarily long entry, I will now go work on the resume…