Rebirth, Walking, and God... A big day.

How to describe today?

*Rebirth*
Today was graduation day for the yoga leadership course that I have been a part of for over 10 months now. I spent a decent part of today laughing to myself about how interesting life is.

I, along with my classmates who were also graduating, crawled through a canal of white spandex that was lined on both sides by non-graduating and previously graduated members. They lifted the tunnel-like stretchy material; they twisted it to seal it off; they made the crawler fight their way through. It was the oddest, comfortable thing I have ever done. As I watched my classmates go before me, I was laughing and a panic alarm was going off in my head. I was seeing myself beginning, getting half way and then freaking out due of claustrophobia. Once I was inside the space it was actually comforting and I found myself patient every time I hit an obstacle. Instead of freaking out or pushing through with all of my might, I eased off and waited until I felt ready to keep going. All I could think about afterwards, was that I am experiencing so much here that some people never get to. I am taking the intense with the incredible with the overwhelming and crazy. I’m trying to let all of my experiences wash over me as something I do, not who I am.

We received our certificates and a long stem rose along with a big hug from the studio owner. It was funny because I missed the last graduation so I wasn’t sure how to go about the ritual, but I stumbled along and was embraced as rose petals were thrown over my head. It was beautiful.

We finished the celebration of rebirth with a feast. The studio owner made delicious spicy spaghetti, there were tons of cookies and cakes. We had fruit, meat, pizza, so much delicious food. The best part was the tofu scramble a friend of mine made with me in mind. She is a rock star and she is going to be opening a restaurant soon. I’m looking forward to her organic café.

*Walking*
Today I walked a lot. I walked for about 2 or 2 ½ hours. It felt good to use my body in this way. Walking is a great time to meditate. It is easy to fall into a rhythm.

*God*
A friend asked me if I believe in predestination or if I believe that life is chaos. That is such a massive question and I am not solid on my answer. I told her all that I knew was that I believed in energy (call it what you will Gaia, God, Thor, Allah…) and that this energy changes shape and interacts with everything around it. When things die their energy is broken apart and ends up going into lots of other things. We feel sentimentality when we interact with energy that was recently connected to energy that currently makes us up. I said that I have had moments where I feel like there are too many coincidences to be chaos, but then I’ll have moments were it seems like everything is just about everything doing its own thing and the causes and effects of said occurrence.

Recently I had thought about a woman who frequented the yoga studio. For a while she was attending every day- all day, but since I came back from vacation and little before that she had vanished. She had been ridic eccentric. I think I have blogged about her before. She would just start crying on Saturdays for no apparent reason. She was volatile and highly emotional. She was difficult for me to process. Tonight on the bus ride back from Home Mart she hopped on with a new do. We greeted each other and she told me she stopped doing yoga because she found God… She took my phone number…

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